Sippin' with the Shannons

I Love Eight Toed Clyde

Bridget Shannon and Colleen Shannon Episode 79

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On this week's episode, we're recapping our St. Paddy's Day weekends, discussing the new books we're reading, wondering where Kate Middleton is and living for the comment section. Then we get into the topic of the week... BONNIE & CLYDE. The notorious outlaws and lovers have a story that will have you clutching onto your seatbelt for dear life. The Barrows gang crime spree spread to five states and over multiple years until they meet their untimely demise. Buckle up in the V8, Sippers!!  #ThisAintTexas #AintNoHoldEm

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Okay, we're ready. I don't think the they're I can't even talk. One, your hair looks ravishing today. Thank you. I just showered before you got here. Two, I think our hunchbacks are hunching. Like we Yeah. Did we did this table get shorter? No, we need new mics. We lean forward onto the table and I think we need those ones that swing around. I would agree. Because imagine being able to sit back and just have it right in front of our faces. That would make me So happy because sometimes when you're telling a story I lean back and then my audio is really low Yeah, because I just lean forward to say something to just look at you and listen to a story and talk that would be a dream Our ancestors would be so happy for our backs Yeah, cuz we're hunching mm hmm it's giving jumbo shrimp what's the guy from the movie That's not helpful. Pounch back. What's his name? Oh, Quasimodo? Quasimodo! That's not helpful. That's like the guy from that movie. That's how I feel in the morning. Uh, like Quasimodo? Yeah. Sanctuary! Now you understand the reference. I do. Before I would just smile and laugh. As I do most things. How you doing? I'm alive. Okay. I'm fine. I'm fine! I'm fine. Everything's fine. How are, how are ya? I'm good. Well, well, first of all, hi everyone. Hey. Welcome to this week's episode of Sippin with the Channins. We're cousins and each week we sit down, we sip on some wine, we talk some shit, and we have a good giggle. I am Bridget Channin. And I'm Colleen Channin. I'm well. Is that true? I'm well. Yeah. Are you lying? No. I'm, as you would say, alive. Okay, cool. We had some issues over the weekend in my apartment. No dead birds. No dead birds, no dead animals, just like maybe some leaks in some, some water where it shouldn't be. But it's figured out where we are. We got there. and we celebrated St. Patrick's Day together, which was nice and flirty and fun. Well, not the day on Friday. We, we did a cousin night. Yeah, we pussy popped. And we went to the Black Rose. We did so Colleen got there first, and I get a text message, the girl chat gets a text message. It's inhumane in here. And what I tell you, it was just a bar with people in it. No, you don't understand. Guys, listen to me. I know I'm dramatic. Inhumane, Colleen? No, when I got there, it was sardine city because the stools were all still up. So I texted you guys, I was in a panic because I was like, I cannot fit, therefore you five cannot fit. This is going to be a problem, so I was trying to find like a nook or a cranny that I was like, oh, I will bunker down here, pitch a tent, you know, be ready for the squad. It wasn't happening, so I was panicking, so therefore I texted, this is inhumane, but then the little lad behind me said, excuse me ma'am, we're taking away all the stools now, I'm going to have to have you move over, and then I was like, oh word. I do agree that the stools do take up a lot of room. I laughed out loud when I saw it inhumane. I was like, fucking Colleen, and it's not 10 p. m. It was like 6, 15 p. m. Like it wasn't at the level yet. Oh yeah, no. I also had this like mental vision because obviously I started to panic and I was like, Oh, I'm the first one here. I'm the only one here. I've never done this before in my life. You've never been to the bar first? No. Before a group of people? I don't go to the bar like alone, period. I've never like met one friend at one bar, like ever. Weird, what do you mean? Like I usually go out with Erin, so I'm always with Erin. I never like go somewhere alone. That's so strange to me. I know. No wonder why you have a complex. But you know what I mean? So I immediately was like, oh, what do I, what do I do with myself? So then I was like, oh, I guess I'll just sit at the bar by myself. But then when I got there, I was like, oh, there's nowhere I could go. I think I'm so used to living. I've only go places to meet people. People sometimes come here and then we go. But that's only really you guys. When I go out to meet my friends, I Uber or I drive or I'm solo. If I'm going by myself, it's if I'm late because I had work or something and I have to meet a group of people somewhere, but they're always there before me. That's so mean. And I rarely go anywhere by myself because I'm a cheap bitch and I don't take Ubers alone because I'm like, ugh, that sucks. Can you even imagine the horror? That sucks there and back. Mm, I'm driving. I will find a, I'll park in a back alley. Like, I will have these, I will contemplate these things myself. Like I drove myself to Black Rose. Yeah, that makes sense. Yeah, because I was like, oh, I'm not paying for any over there back So then I will say when we were there, it was quite fun We ended up getting a table which was we belong in the back corner We belonged in the table that we got which was the back corner fit us all perfectly. I did have this realization though when I was looking at Drink prices and the band was great, but they didn't play our, all of our favorites. Those were one to every, I would say five or six songs. Yeah, but I wanted some consistency, but also like, it's not all about us. No, it's not. And it's the environment, right? Like you're going out on St. Patrick's Day for the environment. But I did think to myself, I think I'm going to throw my own St. Patrick's Day party next year with the fam and do a cousin thing where we listen to the music we want because we all listen to the same things. And we have food and we bring our own drinks. Oh my god, no Magners in any bar. So was there like a shortage, question mark? So Magners cider from Ireland is a, it's a classic. I drink it all over the place, everywhere I go. They apparently stopped shipping to Boston until late, at the end of April or something. No Magners in the city. If you wanted Magners, you would not find it. Abhorrent. You should be ashamed of yourselves. How? Why? I need answers. May I tell you, I've never had a Magners before. Oh, for the love of Christ, Colleen. Cause I was really gonna piggyback on that and be like, that is so sacrilegious, but then it's like, that's just, I'm lying. It's my version of not having Guinness. Got it. Okay. Understood. Cause I don't drink beer, so I drink Magners. It's comparable. To me it is. I don't think in the general sense it is, but to me it is. Okay. So I was a little miffed. I think that's for this holy high holiday. I think that's a little sacrilege. So I agree. Yeah. Thank you for supporting me. I'll also, you have never, I'll grab the pitchfork too. I'll join the mob. Light the torch, lead the way. I'm right behind you. If there was ever a group of hate for something, I'm in, I'm in on it. Uh, yeah, no. So we had a good night. How was the rest of your weekend? I saw you. Well, so on Friday, Colleen says to us, I am not going to Southie on Sunday. I am not. I refuse. Did I say those words? Yep. The next time I saw your location, strutting down Broadway at about 9 a. m. in the morning. So, I don't remember saying that, so therefore, I, uh, It's null and void at that point. I can't even keep up with my own lies these days. I, first of all, I was so unwell on Saturday. Like, I woke up and I could not open my eyes. And that hasn't happened to me in a really long time. Which doesn't make any sense because it's not like I was hammered when I left. I was gonna say, you weren't drunk. No, I was sober enough to drive. Obviously, I drove the car. Like, I was not drunk, but, I literally could not open my eyes. I had to put on my, like, my cold cap Do you have one of those? You would really like it. What's a cold cap? It looks like, it's thick, and it wraps around your head. It looks like a cap. Sure. And it's, mine's bright pink, and you put it in the fridge. So when you're hungover, if you have a headache, I, yeah. Yes. But I, yeah. Had to literally crawl to the fridge to put it on and I just laid there and literally had to be like In through your nose up through your mouth Like it was the weirdest thing and I couldn't stop gagging and I don't know what that like I have not felt that way And I drink tequila sodas every weekend So, I don't know something something was not right. The math was not math and there was something going on inside, but it's fine I revived and I went to uncle Bob's birthday 70th birthday in the Cape. Oh, yeah Bobert Bobert's birthday. Yeah, was it it was a sleigh It was a slight, I was driving there at like 2 o'clock and I felt like it was 9am and I was like, something's wrong. Something's wrong. Something ain't right. Yeah, I went home, slathered on myself tanner like the good lord intended. Didn't shower, probably. No, of course not. No, of course not. No. and then I went to bed, felt like Christmas, couldn't sleep. Woke up at 6 and woke Fiona up with a little Irish jig in the morning. I will say, I love your snapchats. They're, they give me life, I'm like, look at her, pussy popping all over Boston. I don't need to see your ass waxing strips, though. If you could refrain from sending me the remnants of your wax strips, I, in the future, would greatly appreciate it. Gang, I've cracked the code. You've heard about the Ass Crack Chronicles. Yes. The, and I don't remember because I'm me, did I talk about how I bought these strips? Yeah. Okay, well, I did use them. I used them. No, and I saw photo evidence of you using them. And they do work. So I've cracked the code. I'm happy for you. I don't want evidence. Okay. I, I trust. It's not real unless I send a staff gentleman. Nope. Nope. Nope. I think it is. I think it is. Oh, good Lord. a couple things. My notes to ponder from Sunday are the key to success is, as an old person, who In her 20s. Gross. As an old hag, is, if you don't have a pal that lives in the Southie area where it's like, vibes are high, like you're close enough, but you're not like, in it, because like, no one wants to hang out with the fucking grubby little teenagers on Broadway. Not I. If you get to the bar before and then you leave way after, you don't have to interact with any of these human beings. And it is fabulous. You find somewhere just to plop down for the day with the windows and you can just see everything from afar. The windows! With the windows you can see the people, you can people watch. I was ready to see people getting arrested, I was ready to see bodies, like I was ready for the drama. And I could just see it from the window. Let the bodies hit the floor. Let the bodies hit the floor. And that I did. Yeah. Did you see any genitalia, considering everyone just openly pees? No, because I was, I was able to avoid all of the cracks and crevices. you know what's so sacrilegious? Tell me. They get porta potties. They do. Well, of course they do. After all these years of people just pissing in the street. But why now? Is what I want to know. What, what made them deserve this? Us. What's disturbing? Your age group and my age group. That's disrespectful. Ruined it for everybody. That's disrespectful. Why do you want them to suffer? You want them peeing on the streets? Yeah, I do. I want them arrested. I want them to get a sex offender charge. I want them taken down. Oh, Colleen, too much. Why? That was too harsh. I don't know if anyone actually did. That was real. But isn't that true? Like public nudity? It's like sex offender. Yes. Okay. So we can at least threaten it. Suffer like we suffered. Make them fear for their lives. Make them sit in the jail cell without shoes or their barrette that they brought. Yes. Their hair elastic. Yes. They feel my pain. They must understand. So I thought you were going to say leave early. You said go early and leave late. Oh, at one point we were like, Oh, we can just go. And I looked to my left and I said, gang, I'm leaving. It's not a time. Plop down. They can't breathe out there. They are so sardine packed. It's between the fence to the parade and the wall to which the bar, uh, the bar is at. I went to the playwright, by the way, which they revamped. It was closed for a while and they redid it. It looks, it's chef's kiss. And music was great. Wasn't too overly packed either. We never had to wait in line. Like, it was, love it. Yeah, it was. and I was just watching from the window and it was, they were fucking people everywhere. I was like, we're not leaving. You can leave me here alone if you want. I will be, I will say, couldn't do it. Oh, that's what I had to tell you. Afterwards, Fiona and I left. And we were like, we need food right now. Where do we go? But Cagney's. So Fiona and I sat our asses at the bar girls. Yeah, we got, we got, uh, egg rolls. What a dream. And I was, the Mashed Potato Egg Rolls. Obviously it's St. Patrick's Day. Of course they're fucking out of it. we sat at the bar and got Diet Coke, I was like the people were definitely like, What the fuck? But I, we were done. We were done. Done so. Done so. Done. And I was like, do you think they're judging us? I was like, I don't care! Let me tell you, I think those egg rolls are still in my stomach, but that's besides the point. But yeah, that was, that was that. You woke, you woke Fiona up pretty violently. No, I didn't. I was just with a good jig. It was at 6. 45am and it was shipping up to Boston. Tell me more when I go home, the boys won't leave, the girls are long. The girl in my head is on my door, but that's alright, cause I'm home. She is handsome, she is pretty, she is the belle of Belfast City. Yeah, that's what I woke up to. She goes, turn it off. But in my defense, she told me the day before, like, even cause she went out the night before, not really late. Oh, I went to go pick her up and I was dying my hair, my gray hair. She's like, I was like, yeah, just let me know when you want me to get you later. And it was like nine o'clock. I didn't expect her to text me until at least 11. And so I was mid die. And she's like, yeah, come whenever, if you don't mind coming to pick me up at Publico. And I'm like, okay. Okay let me just rinse really quickly. So I legit rinsed and went with my, in a bathrobe with my hair in a towel to pick her up and I was at a red light and selfie and I look to my left and there's two coughs and a cough and they were just like, I went, saluted them. Full head wrap going on. Good sirs. How's your evening? How do you do? Preparing for tomorrow's festivities? Are you? Yeah, she was dying laughing because I didn't tell her. I was just like, yeah, I'm on my way. She's like, what the fuck have you done? In my bathrobe. Yeah, that was it. Yeah, I went to a cute little parade. I visited my sister. I feel like the parade's like slay. It was wicked cute. Yeah, it was cute. It was a good length, too. It wasn't, it didn't feel silly, even though we were in a small town. It didn't feel like, oh, this is. People love that parade. Yeah, it was great. The kids loved it. They threw candy everywhere. I swear to God, they got just about as much candy as you would on Halloween. so giving. So giving. I've been babysitting the kids, so seeing them and spending time with them is really great. Danny is in his Monopoly era. He loves Monopoly. He talks about buying property. We got a finance man. He loves it. thinks it's hilarious to go to jail, you know, he's in his, he's four and he's like, I'll buy it. It's like very, Claire's crazy. It's great. It's great being home and spending time with them. I love St. Patrick's day. And I just, I think next year we do it our own way. I think so too. I feel like we're never, we're never, And maybe this is just me, but fully satisfied. I am at moments, and then I'm like, oh, we could do this better. And I think, especially this year, this year it was beautiful out. That really helped. Like, I was outside in a t shirt and jeans, I'm perfectly comfortable. I was in a sweatsuit. You were in I look like a booger. No, you don't. You, there was a picture of you, smoking a cig, leaning up. It's so iconic. It's iconic. It's such a vibe. I said this to my mom. I said, this is why I don't have a boyfriend. Why? Because I just thought she would giggle. And? She said, stop smoking. Sorry, mom. Shall we? Shall we, mom? Love you. Anything else? Um,, yeah. I had three thoughts. One, I'm just so over people's tacky Instagrams on St. Patrick's Day. Like what? For example. Oh wow, she came ready with receipts. Shake your shamrocks? No, get the fuck out of here. Who says shake your shamrocks? Fucking losers, apparently. Sorry, I'm feeling hateful today. I can tell. Jesus. It's not like a dark cloud. Type of hatred. It's like, just like, uh, I'm, I'm good. We're good here. Everyone's Irish today. That's not true. That's simply not true. That doesn't mean you can't celebrate, but just know your role. So quick question. Do you celebrate Cinco de Mayo? No. Hmm. You don't? No. You're not a Cinco girlie? I've never been like to a party that was like Cinco or like gone out of my way to like go get a drink to celebrate. I feel like it's that. The opposite way. You know when girls go ham for Cinco de Mayo. I know my role. But I like a margarita, but I like it every other day of the year, so. Minus the heartburn. I could've used some Tums on Sunday, that's for sure. kiss me, I'm Irish. Mm hmm. Please. And stop wearing t shirts that say that. A lot of people do that one. I don't care. That one doesn't bother me. Mm. Okay. It's like, eh. I just think if you're my age and you're wearing a Kiss Me I'm Iris t shirt, get out, get out of here. Got it. But also, what age group is that okay for? I don't know. I think a little Nana would be cute in it. Sly. I knew you would like that one. So sly. luck of the Irish are just like things like, just like standard. I don't know why it bothers me. Just any Luck of the Irish, I contemplated writing that because I'm like, that's just like so like straightforward. You can't really hate on that, I guess. So anything having to do with St. Patrick's Day with people who aren't Irish is annoying to me. Okay. Luck of the Irish. Great. Yes. Yes. Yes. We are Irish, we are lucky. If you aren't, you are not. And that is that. Okay. Put it on my gravestone. Sure. What, what is it, If you're lucky enough to be Irish, you're lucky enough. Is that what it is? Yes, it is. Okay, cool. Just checking. I read a book. Okay. And by read a book, I mean it took me like a month and a half to read said book because I just am unwell. Yeah. It was on BookTalk, I was really excited about it, okay? It was called Behind Closed Doors. By B. A. Anderson. Sure. All over book talk, the girl is on book talk, will know what I'm talking about. Yep. Fucking terrible. Really? Yeah, I was so pissed. And I kept, I was reading it so slowly because I'm like, okay, something will happen. Like something crazy is about to happen, like very Frieda McFadden. Nope. The way that I went to go turn the page, and it was the last fucking page of the book and I didn't know. Oh, that's so disappointing, especially when it's blowing up and you're like, okay. I kept going back being like, oh, did I, I must've, no. Oh, I hate that. Nope. Not, not a slay. So if anybody has any books that will take me out of my book rut, I'm not, I can't trust book talk. So I do. Okay. So my bestie Hillary told me to read a book called A Court of Thorns and Roses. Uh, yeah, that's on my list. The way that this series has gripped my entire life. I have not only read the first one, I have finished the series and have started to reread them. It's been a week and a half. How many are there? Four? Five. Okay. Five. Okay. It is, so if I had to compare it to something, it starts off like Beauty and the Beast meets Hunger Games. Okay, we, we can fuck with that. It's fantasy, but it's also smut. It's wild. It has gripped me. The second book is a masterpiece and I can't get enough of it. I can't stop reading it. It's one of those series that when it was over, I had like a hangover from it. Like I, I didn't want to go back to real life. Like I didn't want to think about anything else. I was like, I want to keep living in this. Like when you drive in the car, it's what you think about. Oh, I literally listened to it in the car today. I started a podcast that I always listened to and was like, Nope, I'm. I need a moment. When I'm turning down Morbid in My Favorite Murder to listen to a book, that's when you know. Did you listen to Morbid today? not the one from today. What's today? I mean, I, I listen to everything. Maybe yesterday. the one about the whales? No, not yet. Okay. It was a good one. I listened to it. Oh, okay. I can, I'd say too, recently, they both, My Favorite Murder and Morbid, did a few same stories. Oh, did they? Yeah. Like a couple weeks apart, they both did. The same stories and they had to address it and I'm like, okay, imagine listening to a podcast and being so put out that your two favorite shows did the same story that you're sending so much hate to these podcasts that they have to acknowledge it while they're recording. It's insane. Because they were just like, it happens. We don't have time to listen to anybody else's either. Right. They're like, we run a whole ass business. We don't know what stories they're doing. They don't know what stories we're doing. Like, it's just not that big of a deal. Which one acknowledged? My favorite murder. Oh, okay. And they didn't even say morbid, but I listen to Morbid every week, so I know. But I'm like, okay. Everyone calm the fuck down. It's just, if that's, if that is your biggest problem in the week, is that your two favorite podcasts did the same story? I I'm jealous. I wish what a luxury, what a luxury it must be. If you're sending any form of hate or comments such as that, like, you need to look inward. And I will say, I am having this weird thing with the internet recently where I love it so much, but I also can't stand it. So, the other day I was dying laughing because the Love is Blind finale came out. Sarianne and Jeremy, I fucking can't with the two of them. Trevor was read for filth. I, I can't. And so, yeah. Sarah Ann came out with this stupid TikTok, and I was just like, ew. And every single comment was making me die laughing, and one girl called her Side Salad Sarah. And I Side Salad Sarah is fucking brilliant. Yeah, it is. But then you watch The Bachelor and it's like a girl who was a bitch on the show is now getting death threats And you're just like can we not it's a reality dating show who fucking cares? So sometimes I'm reading these comments like one guy posted a video and it's him strumming the guitar. It's an original song He wrote and he just has massive Pepperoni nipples. Like, just salami nips. I saw that! It keeps scrolling. And someone commented, holy moly areole. And I The internet is undefeated. The comment section is where I live. I love a comment section, but I also hate that crap. I'm like, get over yourself. I like it when it's like, on the fence of being okay. Like, for example, when the Sub. Went under. Oh, the submersible, yeah. The submersible. Well, that, like, the, the content was Oh my god, the Kate Middleton stuff. Horribly hilarious. Horrible situation, but the internet slays. It was so funny. The Kate Middleton stuff. Why do people think Kate Middleton is missing? I, I can't, because no one has seen her. She has not been seen. She was on a farm today. She's fine. So that was all set up. Oh, okay. I, I haven't seen it yet, but I'm sure that was set up because people, people are like, she's getting a BBL. She got bangs and she hates them and she's growing them out. She's getting lip injections. The Secret Service are back at it again. Yeah, like Or whoever the fuck they are over there. Well, people are saying now he's cheating and this is Yeah, it's just But again, the internet is fucking hilarious sometimes. Is he the bald one? Yes. You know what I learned today? Sure, what? That when someone gets hair plugs, it's hair from other forms of your body. That they implant. Sorry? So like men, they take like their ass hairs and put it on their head. Oh no. I swear to god I learned that today. Where did you learn that? A guy I work with. Wow. We have weird conversations sometimes. Yeah, I don't know how that came up in a normal conversation, but Jesus. Yeah, did you know that? So like, if I needed hair plugs, like, what are we going to do? Are we taking my pubes and putting them on my head? Well, like your leg hair maybe? I don't think it's If you grew it out? Well, that's what I said, and he was like, I don't think that's strong enough. It needs to be coarse? I don't know. You're just going to grow your armpit hair and your vagina? Well, he told me that they take it from my guy's ass cheeks. Or their legs? I, I, I don't know. And they plug it on your fuckin forehead? Do you know what is weird though? Hair is only considered gross when it's not attached to you anymore. It's on a certain place in your body. Yeah. Technically it's hair, right? Uh huh. And it, if it didn't, If it's washed, I don't know. I don't know, I'm feeling it. How is it that we're like, oh yeah, my lash just locks, but then you grow one pube and you're like bleh. That's what I mean. It's like, it's hair. Hair is hair. Yeah. So if it's placed in another different part of your body and it's washed, then like, does it really matter that you're touching ass hair? I don't know. Like if you were to rub your hands through your hair and you're just like, this came from my ass. I don't know, ask someone that's like all natural. They could probably answer that question. Yeah, if someone who just doesn't like to shave. They would have a different perspective. No shame. No shame whatsoever. I'm just curious. Yes. What your thought process is. Yeah, I'm interested. I agree. So, anyway, why do people think Kate Middleton is missing? Question mark. It's what I wrote today. Someone posted that they're doing this whole big thing on Easter. I don't know. They said she got Surgery, but sus, sus, sus, sus, sus. So they think it's like her stunt double or something? Well, yeah, and then she posted the picture that is obviously really badly edited. It's just bad. It's all bad. And the monarchy just seems to be a complete hot mess at this point. Like, Harry's gone, the queen died, you've got a king who has cancer, Kate is missing, You know William might be cheating. It's just all over the motherfucking place. The world is bored. The world is so bored Yeah, do you know what it is? Trash like everything is a trash fire. So we are clinging on to stupid bullshit to Occupy our times. I'm fine with it Colleen's like I thrive keep it rolling. Oh, she was seen I'm pissed. Let's keep it going. Let's keep this mystery up. Aliens have taken her. Oh, Lord. Aboard the mother ship. Well, I'll tell you what. I've been nonstop watching Love Island, the All Star season because I haven't seen it yet. And my good Lord, it is so good. I will say the only thing that's different that I don't like as much as everyone has history with each other. Just like Bachelor in Paradise, they've all met, chatted, DM'd, where when you're watching a true season, usually they don't know each other. Sometimes they send in an ex to like shake shit up. Yeah. But everybody almost knows everybody. So you have to know the background on it. Oh my god, they just did the PDA awards. Colleen was there. I am shook. Georgia Steele. You sketchy as fuck, girl. You sketchy as fuck. Team Molly, forever. Big victim energy. Big victim energy on this hoe. Well, anytime it just stares towards her, she deflects and tries to push it back on someone else. It's crazy. She is stunning, though. Yeah, she is. Stunnin Stunnin It's hard to pull off bangs. Lucky bitch. Ha ha ha ha ha ha. But Molly. I love Molly. Unreal. Unreal. And it's hard to find someone that looks like that and acts like that. She's just not a real life human. Like, when I look at her, I just think we don't have the same organs. Whatever genetics that made her up, I don't have one iota of them. Correct. God has favorites. We're not one of them. And I said to Colleen, just look at her, and she goes, no, I refuse. It honestly makes me upset. And like, she's prettier without makeup. Like, what the fuck? And she's funny and smart, and she holds herself well in the way she is. Yeah, she's just a baddie. Big, big Molly girl. It's upsetting. Love, Chris. I'm excited. We'll see how the season goes. Okay. Are you ready for the topic of the day? That was a lot. So yeah. Yeah. Okay. So today we're going to be talking about Bonnie and Clyde. Okay. Do you know anything about them? Not really. Isn't there a Justin Bieber song with Bonnie and Clyde in it? Bonnie and Clyde. Like it's on the tip of my tongue, you know? Of course. That's what you said. Okay. So we're just going to trigger warning this right out of the gates. Sexual abuse, domestic violence, murder, gore, all of the things. And so Bonnie and Clyde are a famous couple from the 1930s, and I picked them because I thought you would love the topic of outlaws. Are they the baddies that like had a certain car that was like notorious? Mm hmm. Okay. Well, yeah. Not baddies in a good way. Baddies as in mean. Well, you be the judge by the end. Okay. Fueled by a passionate love, the desire to escape poverty, and utter contempt for authority, Bonnie and Clyde would go on a crime spree that would shock the nation. Their notorious gang would go on a bloody crime wave that would stretch across five states multiple years. cops hated them and the nation loved them at first. So let's get into it. So Clyde Barrow was born in Texas in 1909. Long ass time ago. Holy shit. Yeah. When you say 30 years ago, I think 2000. I mean, I think like 1970. Yeah. And it's like 2000. Yeah. That's crazy. Uh huh. I totally agree with you. He was the sixth child of all boys. They had a super loving family, but I cannot express to you how poor they were. They did not have two pennies to rub together. They had so much trouble making ends meet that they lived under a wagon and they were constantly covered in mud, the whole family. And they barely had enough food to avoid malnutrition. They were never full. He never knew what it was like to be full when he was a kid. So, I don't understand. I mean, it's obviously the times. Right, contraception is not Why are you still Easy. Okay, you can still pull out in the 19, early 1900s. I'm just saying. I don't know. Clyde Senior needs to Figure some shit out. Figure it out. So, they, they end up moving to Dallas and this felt like an upgrade because they lived on a campground in a tent in the slums. So very, very, very poor. And by 16, Clyde has quit school, and he was a pretty small kid. He was about 5'7 at his, you know, when he was fully grown. And he was, I'm making up, uh, weight here, but like 120 pounds so I can wet. He was really slim, like he was a, Colleen just looked at me like goal weight. Jealous. yeah, he was a mama's boy. People said he was really innocent. He loved to joke around. He loved to dance. He was super friendly, like he was just a really lovely kid. And his older brother Buck was actually a career criminal at this point. And Clyde would see him buying nice clothes and driving nice cars around. So eventually he's like, what are you doing? to get in. Like, how can I get in on the action? He really wanted to never be hungry again and who could fucking blame him, honestly. So it started off with small stuff like stealing cars, scamming people, stuff like that. Clyde quickly becomes well known at the police station. He eventually gets bolder and at one point he was on the run from the police for a bunch of robberies he did and he was actually hiding out from the cops and this is where he meets his soulmate, Bonnie Parker. Bonnie was born in 1910. She's a middle child. Her family had a little bit more money than Clyde's, but not by much. Her dad died when she was only four years old, and her mother moved them to a suburb of Dallas, known as Cement City, where there's a ton of poverty. They managed to get through high school, she got through, and she was working as a waitress. She was an amateur photographer. She loved writing poems, and she loved movies. All of those things come up later. Okay, so, just. Yep. She would write stories, starring herself. Just keep that in mind for later. She gets married at fifteen. To him? No. Oh, to another man. To another guy. Oh. Who is also a criminal. I'm pretty sure I saw somewhere he had already been to prison for murder at this point. Ain't got no. Don't quote me on that. I didn't look into him, but I think I heard that somewhere. That's okay. a few days before her 16th birthday because she was looking to have a normal life with someone who could provide for her, unfortunately, he was a drinker and he beat her regularly. He would disappear at weeks at a time and when he did come back, she would fight with him. Was she? She's a fiery lady. We love that. She's 4'11 Love that even more. She's a spitfire. She did not take anyone's shit. And they say that she never divorced him. Some even say she was wearing his wedding ring till the day she died. But they were not together. Okay. She leaves him. And That's so early 1900s to not go through a formal divorce. I know. She just bounces and he ends up getting convicted of bank robbery and sent to prison. So they're separated. See ya. So he's out of the picture. So in January 1930, she meets Clyde. He's 20. She's 19. she meets him through a friend of a friend. Blind date set up, am I right? Goals! They fall in love immediately. They spend every waking moment together for two weeks until the police finally catch up with him and arrest him. He's convicted of five car thefts and sent to prison. He immediately plans his escape with Bonnie. She's absolutely head over heels with him and is more than happy to help. So she somehow smuggles a gun into him, into prison. I'm not even gonna ask how that Ah, listen. He manages to escape and he leaves the state with Bonnie. And they just fuck right off. Okay. Within a couple weeks, they recapture him. He's retried, and he receives a 14 year sentence. No! Not for Clyde! Yeah. And so, in prison, he becomes best friends with this man named Ralph Fultz. And they form an alliance. the guards were beating everyone regularly. So you know how prisons right now are horrible, are awful? Can they stop abusing their power? For sure, I would love that. So now they've, some, I won't say all because it's really not pretty, the entire prison system, but some work towards some form of rehabilitation. Prisons back in these days are horrific. They are meant to break you. They are not meant to rehabilitate. They are meant to make you suffer every waking moment of every single day. To the point where they had to do such hard labor that some people died from it. They were known to shoot prisoners to keep everyone else in line. Like, there was just no they were popping off. So his second stint is worse than he could have ever imagined and The apparently one time his bestie Fultz has escaped prison I guess people were doing that like left right and center back in the day He gets recaptured and he's a target now and one day two guards cornered him Held him down and beat him to the point where he was almost unconscious in Clyde watching this whole thing just had Anger in his eyes and his fists were clenched and they turn around they notice him and they're like what do you want boy? Do you want some of this? Yeah Clyde doesn't say anything but it took the attention off of Foltz and the guard stopped and Foltz would say that it saved his life So after this incident, they are besties and they Say that they're gonna get revenge and that one day they're gonna escape. They're gonna get a gang They're gonna go back to the prison. They're gonna turn every prisoner loose and kill all the guards okay. Put a pin in that. I'm like, I'm getting reared up with them too. So Clyde doesn't know this, but his mother and sister are working really hard on a petition to get him released. Oh, that's nice. And Bonnie and Clyde's relationship only intensifies with their written correspondence. I love that. Love notes for days. I saw a few of them. They were really gushing. A lot of baby, honey, sugar. Imagine receiving a letter, like a handwritten letter. No! Oh my god, I would kill myself. He says this, quote, If I could just spend a week with you, I'd be ready to die. Bye. No. And some of us can't get a text back. I'd be left unopened. Left on read. Yeah. So they're in love. And when I say they worked outside the farm, like I said, hard labor all day long. So really the only thing keeping him alive is these letters to Bonnie and back to him. Trigger warning for sexual abuse, so just skip ahead really quick. So like I said, Clyde was not that big of a guy. He had a regular tormentor in prison who was six feet and two hundred plus pounds. He got sexually abused so bad all of the time that one day he hit a pipe. He somehow got his hands on a pipe. He invited his abuser to meet him at the open parts of the toilets. And when the guy got there, the phrase used was, quote, he swung so hard he nearly took the guy's head off. Damn. So he beats the shit out of this guy, and the abuse stopped, but one of Clyde's friends said that basically the damage was done. Quote, I watched my friend turn from a schoolboy into a rattlesnake. Yikes. Those words have some depth there. Because it's a perfect description of this, like, young, jovial boy into this, you know, I mean, he's been abused every day for, right. So, to say he's getting impatient to get out of prison isn't the understatement of the century. He, again, does not know what his mother and his sister are doing. So, if you haven't skipped ahead already, skip ahead one more time if you get grossed out easily, because Clyde asks another inmate, to help him cut off his toes so that he would have an excuse to not do the hard labor and they did. They cut off two. But two weeks later he gets pardoned and there was no reason he should have done that because he didn't know. Right. Smart thinking though. So he'd walk with a limp for the rest of his life because of it. Oh, you would do that from losing two toes? Yeah, bitch. How do you think you balance? Damn. Yeah. That's crazy. So he walks out of prison with crutches, and he goes home to Dallas in February 1932. He's a completely different person. Like I said, once a jovial, fun loving, love to dance boy was a hardened, beaten down, grown man. Okay, but stop stealing cars, like, come on. I also think, well, hold that thought, because I think your opinion may change a little bit. No, I still love him. I love A toad Clyde. A toad Clyde. sidebar, how we're talking about, like, they're getting handwritten letters, but I'm getting messages, like, what I got from, what's his name this weekend, on Hinge, that I sent you guys. Oh my God, she sent us a message that was like, promise me you'll ride my mustache. Okay, gang, gang, listen to me. I don't use Hinge. I really don't. I, like, barely. I have one as most used. I don't know what to do. But I am so fearful of strangers. And this is exactly fucking why, okay? I think he like, likes something of mine and then I like something back of like, something about his mustache. And I think I like, put like a hundred percent or something like on one of his mustache prompts or whatever. Cause like, mustache. Hello. Yeah. Only if you promise you'll ride my mustache, is the response I got. And wasn't it at like 9am in the morning? It was at Monday morning, 11am. This man was at work, just saying to a perfect stranger, as long as you'll ride my mustache. But of course, I'm like, so I can't ignore this. I just responded on real response. Like, I can't let that one go. No, that's crazy. That's all. Continue. Oh, Lord. The men are not okay. Meanwhile, Clyde's over here like, I just need a week with you and then I can die a happy man. Please ride my mustache. Are you persimilar? Super similar. Oh, how times have changed. So Clyde's home. He struggles a lot because he got out during the Great Depression. So, he's trying to get a job, which are already pretty bad. Scarce to begin with, and every time he locks down a job, anytime something happens in the town, the cops immediately go to the usual suspects. So all these cops keep showing up to all of his jobs, being like, where were you? What were you up to? His bosses are noticing and fire him, every time. So he's trying to stay Clean. Literally hard. And he cannot keep a job and it happens over and over and over again at so many different jobs that he's just like fed up with it. There is a letter Bonnie wrote to Clyde that said this, quote, I know you can't ever live in Dallas because you can't live down the awful name you got here, but sugar, you can go somewhere else and get a job and work. I want you to be a man, honey, and not a thug. I know you are good and I know you can make good. I love them. Yeah. Yeah. So Clyde's on the straight and narrow for a couple of weeks, he has a half hearted attempt, and then he's an ex con. No! Come on, Clyde! He didn't want to go back to prison, but he can't keep a job. A life of crime is really his only option. To him, is his only option. Listen to Bonnie! I know. So, let's set the scene here, by the way. The Great Depression, an awful time in this country. Desperate people are doing very desperate things. A quarter of the population is unemployed. People are homeless. Families don't have food. There were a lot of people jumping trains. farmers losing their farms during the dust storms. There's a huge disparity between the rich and the poor. The poor has nothing. They have nothing. There's a huge uptick in crime. There was a lot of anger and resentment towards the big establishments like the banks, the government, big businesses, the rich, the powerful, the people who are struggling to live feel completely helpless. And Bonnie and Clyde are no different. They are a byproduct of the desperate times that everyone's in it. And so the depression created a new breed of criminal that everyone loves. the outlaw. They operate under a Robin Hood mentality. They attack these big businesses and they give back to the poverty stricken people. And that's all they want. They just want to thrive. They just want to live. They want to have a roof over their head. And so they love that law. Americans are obsessed with that laws. So this is people like John Dillinger, Ma Barker and her sons, Babyface Nelson, Machine Gun Kelly, Pretty Boy Floyd, to name a few. So this sparks a fascination in real life, but also in movies. So movies are starting to come out about outlaws, and like I said, Bonnie loves movies and wants to be a star. Right? So she's along for the ride. Yeah, and gangster films become so popular, the government becomes alarmed. Like, even the government was like, damn, we're gonna have an uprising. The government can shut up. The. Government. She put it in quotes. She put it in quotes. Whoever you are, we're talking to you, government. Whatever branch. No, please don't come for me. I just pay my taxes. Don't come for me. I have not. You know what? Fuck you guys. I owe you so much money. Leave me alone. So back to Bonnie and Clyde. As notorious as they are, they weren't exactly well thought out thieves. They basically travel around, they do whatever the fuck they want until they run out of money, and then they just rob the next bank they see. Okay. Slay. But sometimes they're, I mean, it's exactly what you would expect from 20 something year olds. They rob banks and they sometimes only get 10 to 20 bucks, but, and they like put their lives on the line for it. So they're not, it's not really about the money. It's more about the rush and the notoriety. At first, Clyde tries to avoid killing people if he can. Oh, thank God. He, on a few occasions, like would capture an officer, drive around for a bit and then let him go. That's cool. In 1932, Bonnie and Clyde traveling in a stolen car, they're with Ralph Fultz, their buddy from prison, and they do their first robbery as a group. It doesn't go well, and in the escape, Bonnie and Ralph are captured by police, Clyde escapes, Ralph is sent back to prison, and Bonnie waits in a jail cell. And Clyde kept busy while she was away. He teams up with another prisoner pal, Raymond Hamilton, and they rob a shopkeeper. I don't know. Clyde murders him by shooting him in the back and he continued to shoot him as he laid on the floor. So now we have taken a turn into a murderer. Overkill. And the shopkeeper's wife was able to identify both men. Come on, Clyde! And they decide to keep on thieving and because if you were convicted of murder in Texas during these times, you get the electric chair. And Clyde is like, no thank you, thieves be thieving. Yep. So Bonnie's acquitted due to lack of evidence and she's released from jail in 1930, June of 1932. She quickly rejoins Clyde. Clyde is now a wanted man with a price on his head. The governor of Texas was offering 250, which now is a little over, it's like 5, 600 bucks, which like isn't that much money for a murderer? No, if he's, especially if he's like your number one. Yeah, I don't really get that, but it's for his capture and he's depression now. Yeah. Oh, yeah, that's true. Let's feed the people. Yeah, that's true So he's on the front page. They keep on moving. They're hiding out in Oklahoma after a robbing a packing plant They're at a country dance Everyone's dancing now Everyone's just having a grand old time. This is Prohibition. It's also illegal to drink. They all show up shit faced. And a deputy and a sheriff walk up to them and they're like, we don't allow that here, talking about the alcohol. And they kill the deputy and seriously wound the sheriff. They leave in a blaze, driving down the road, emptying their guns out. They abandon three different cars and escape on foot. This would not be the last time cops watch as a armed car, to the teeth, drive away with the barrow gang inside of it. There are a few reasons for this. Number one, they stole guns from the National Guard armories. They are stacked with fucking weapons. We're not talking like, two Colt revolvers. We're talking like, machine gun ridiculousness. Like, twelve of them. Ridiculous. They also drive a Ford V8 as their getaway car, which has more horsepower than a police car. So they have more guns and they drive faster. And Clyde is a driver. He is like F1 racing before it was a thing. With three toes on one foot. I wonder if they did one from each or two, I don't know. But he drives really fast and crazy and he thinks absolutely nothing about sitting behind the wheel of a car for multiple hours and just driving straight through the night. They're also smart enough to know that they need to cross state lines to not be tracked. So, you'll hear me mention five different states throughout this story, because they're just like, ping, ping, ping, ping, ping. Also, I feel like over there in that realm of the country, they're just like really, it's easy to do that. Yeah, it's all flat. Yeah. They call it the flyover states. It's just like flat, southern land. Land. Land. So now they're on the run full time. They would go on to do this for 22 months straight. They weren't living lavishly though. It was not cute. They weren't like throwing massive parties and drinking champagne. They had their love. They bribed. They robbed. They camped out. They lived on scraps. They're parents and families. You will die. They were really worried about them and they did their best to stay in touch. Clyde was known to write a note, put it in a Coke bottle and drive past where his father worked and throw the bottle to where. He worked, and they would also set up different locations to meet them, and they would turn their lights on and off, and Clyde's mom and Bonnie's family would cook them meals and bring them fresh clothes. I love them. I know. I know he's murdering, but like, we love the support. Yeah, the families are out here just trying to, I can't even imagine. So Raymond Hamilton was also close to his family and during a family visit, he's arrested and he's sentenced to 200 plus years in prison. Yeah, so that's the kind of trouble they're all in. Oh, so they're like, we cannot be found. Yeah. So Clyde vowed to get Ray out. Like I said, from the jump with. His other friend Foltz, he had already decided he was going to go back to the prison and kill all the guards and let all the prisoners out. But by this time, the Barrow Gang was well known in the Southwest. They were making headlines all the time, and they all have prices on their heads now, not just Clyde. All of them. Great. Even if they wanted to get out, there's no way at this point. I guess Bonnie could have to some degree, but Clyde is fucked. So he not only doesn't want to go back to prison, but not as a cop killer either. He said once that if he was ever captured by police, he'd take his own life because he has, Zero intentions of going back to the hellhole of prison. No. So, everyone in the Southwest knows them, but they make national fame in March of 1933. Buck Barrow, his big brother, is released from prison. Buck and Bonnie and Clyde arrange a rendezvous with Buck and his wife Blanche, okay? Buck and Blanche. Buck and Blanche. Bring these fuckin names back. Buck Barrow. Buck, Barrow, and Blanche. Yeah. I'll die. Bonnie and Clyde. It's pretty good. I'll die. So it says in the documentary that I watched that Buck was actually going to try to talk Clyde into coming home and going straight. They meet up. They hang out for a couple weeks. They live in an apartment in Missouri. They have this friend, W. D. Jones, living with them too. So it's the four of them, Bonnie, Clyde. WD, Buck, and Blanche. All in this apartment in Missouri. Oh, so he's fifth wheeling. Yeah, hard. For these two weeks, they played cards, they smoke a fuck ton, they drink a fuck ton, and they party non stop. All hours of the day. To the point where the neighbors are like, who the fuck is causing all of this ruckus? They, they don't know how to lay low? They do not. And after, like I said, those two weeks, the Barrow Gang, the money's running low. And so one of the men heads out to case a joint. They're trying to figure out where their next hit will be, burglary is going to be. And when Buck goes to the garage door to come in, as he's closing the garage door, the police pull up. And turns out the neighbors had called the police saying that they thought bootleggers were next door because prohibition. They had no idea that it was the Barrow Gang. And they were ratted out by nosy neighbors. Also keep it the fuck down. You can't lay low. You can't just like drink and be cool about it. You have to be obnoxious. No, I mean, they are in their twenties. I guess, but yeah, I mean, but you're also not on the run from the I was on the run and hiding on the fuck. What are we doing? Right. Exactly. I would be slaying the day away quietly. Watching Vanderpump. Obviously. No, it sucks this season. Don't watch it. Okay. I won't. When the cops go to the front door, they have absolutely no idea who they're about to confront. Clyde and W. T. Jones go to the front door with shotguns and immediately murder the cop. And once that happens, the, uh, there was another cop that was seriously injured and then died a few days later. All fucking hell breaks loose. Bonnie grabs an automatic rifle, starts firing out of the kitchen window. The cops are shooting. They're shooting out of different windows, different doors. Neighbors are losing it. W. D. Jones gets shot in the shoulder and the bullet goes right through him. Clyde gets hit, but it ricochets off his button on his jacket. What are the fucking odds? of all the places to hit on a human body. Uh, Buck gets grazed, Bonnie's running down the stairs, Buck's wife Blanche is running outside chasing her dog Snowball down the street. All of this is happening at the same time. Okay, Blanche, I would do the same thing. So, somehow Buck rallies everyone into the car, they collide driving, pull out of the garage at full speed, they fling all of the doors open and open fire on the cops, and they get away. Snowball is long gone, Unfortunately, Snowball does run away, but Blanche, realizing that Snowball is long gone, jumps in the car. All of them get away. No injuries. My, my question is. Sure. In this moment, why would we have our number one guy, uh, Clyde, answer the door? Why would it peacefully, W. D., whatever the fuck his name is, unknown me unknown man, Why? Why? Just open the door and be like, hi, what's going on? I live here. Like, would they really fucking know and figure it out? No. And then they would have left and then they could have just left right after. I mean, there's the complaint was bootleggers, plural. So they know there's not one man sitting alone in the house. Yeah, that's true. So my guess is. They knew the jig was up, they knew it was too late to hide, and so they Get the automatic weapons out? Get the automatic weapons out. Don't love that. Yeah, don't love that. It's just, it's not the right next step, but we're also not talking about rational humans. We're talking about people on the run, tensions are high, they obviously don't trust cops, prices on their head, and the poor cops have no idea what they're about to walk into. So this goes from, okay, everyone knows them in the Southwest, to major news across the whole country. And this is why. Because, remember how I told you Bonnie loved photography and writing poems? So they find a poem written by Bonnie about two lovers who are on the run and heading for an early demise. They also find a camera with pictures Bonnie has taken. In one picture of Bonnie, it's her holding a gun against Clyde's stomach. Great. And they're clearly posing for it. He's like, obviously not in danger. Then there's a picture of Bonnie and Clyde hugging and looking all lovey dovey on the car. And then there's one of Bonnie leaning on the car, smoking a cigar with the gun. And apparently, she didn't even smoke cigars. She did it She did it for the photo op. Iconic. But all of the pictures in the poem are published in the newspaper. And so the public loses their shit. They're obsessed with the young couple on the run, the outlaws. You know, women at this point are seen very differently and this badass woman leading on this powerful car with a gun and a cigar is a badass. It's not really carrying well. No, you're right. So again, two young, attractive lovebirds who came from nothing who are sticking it to the man. Americans are loving it. Let me show you the pictures. Bonnet. That's Bonnie and Clyde. Okay. Sleigh. This is her. Love that. Love it. That's not how I pictured her. Oh, really? Yeah, I pictured her in a little bit of a racier outfit. Even for the 30s. Oh, really? Yeah. No. The pose. Yeah. The hips. Yeah, she's, she's hangin So, the beginning of the end takes place in Wellington, Texas on the night of June 10th, 1933. Bonnie and Clyde and W. D. are racing to meet up with Buck and Blanche in Oklahoma. Okay. Okay. Clyde is driving too fast. Okay. Okay. Okay. And he doesn't notice that there's a detour sign over the bridge he's about to go on. And WD said, quote, suddenly the road disappeared. Oh my god. And the car sails into the air, turns over as it goes and crashes into a dry riverbed, rolling several times. It comes to rest on its side. I will not go into how awful Bonnie's injuries were. But she burnt her leg very, very badly. Like, from ankle to hip. Oof. The boys are okay, there's a farm family that comes to help them, but they recognize them, and then they call the cops, and they're fleeing, but they're holding her because she can't walk, and it's a shit show. So they go to Arkansas, and they end up meeting up with Buck and Blanche, and they're trying to tend to Bonnie, and they're panicking, and they have no idea what to do, so the gang does a really clumsy grocery store robbery, like, 50 miles away. They just like drive to the nearest one and rob them. And on the way back, they crash into a slow moving car. Like it's a shit show. Sir. I know Clyde driving. And because it's the fucking eight toes so they crash, the driver gets out of the car, comes eye to eye with the barrel gang, fully armed. As that happens, a cop car drives by because they're on their way to investigate a grocery store robbery. They get involved, they kill one of the cops. Ugh, come on. So they're just leaving carnage everywhere they go. I didn't see anything about the man they crashed into being harmed. And the other cop ends up living, but it's a shitshow, right? So they know they need to keep on the move, though. And Bonnie's just burning? And Bonnie is in an apartment, just really struggling. It was so bad, they were like, we don't know if she'll live. They keep moving, the gang settles down in Platte City in Missouri, and they're staying at an inn. They have some beers, they have some food, and they're trying to get Bonnie medication for her wounds. The inn is suspicious. They're like, What the fuck is going on? Also, they go to a drugstore. Who is also suspicious. Both the inn and the drugstore call the cops. Because, hashtag suspish. So, taking no risks this time. The cops show up with machine guns and armored cars ready to rumble. So do they have any idea who it is? They know now. Okay. They know now. So before long, the Barrows gang is completely surrounded in this inn. Sorry, pausing for two seconds. Thinking of the thirties, like It's not like we could like call to be like, Hey, are we, are we sending pigeons? Like how are we getting? Oh no, they have phones. They have like really old school, old school phones. I'm like so confused how they're getting pigeons. Hey, there was a robbery here. It must be your guy. Like how do you call one department to the next? I think a 1930s phone is the one with the dial where it swings and you put it up to your ear and talk into it. I think it's one of those. Okay, cool. So at 1am on July 20th. Sheriff Coffey leading the posse. Bulletproof shields knocks on one of the two cabin doors. There's two cabin doors next to each other. He's like, hey, it's law enforcement. I need to speak to you. Blanche says, like, just a minute. I think she says something about needing to get changed. Like, I'm not decent. I need to get changed. That is actually a prearranged code which alerted Clyde. So she sees that it's the cops, she says this one phrase, Clyde now knows what's happening, he goes into the garage, where Coffey, the police officer, can't see him, and through a glass panel in the door, Clyde whips out his automatic rifle. It's a military grade automatic rifle. Great. Uh, he dives out of the way, the cop, and it's just chaos. Immediately chaos. Good lord. Good lord. Because people quite literally woke up at Joe's violence every day. Yeah, every day. Clyde also is firing rounds at the armored police sedan parked across the street from the garage doors because it's blocking their cars in. So he forces that car to back up. They all get into the car and fucking escape. They get out of it. Where's Bonnie? the cabin that Clyde's in has a door that goes right into the garage. Blanche and Buck do not have that door. So they have to leave out the front to get to the garage. So they're completely exposed. And they obviously are targeted by the gunfire. Buck falls. He gets shot in the head. He lives. He lives. And Blanche is like dragging him. Bonnie and Clyde stopped while under fire helping Blanche drag Buck into the car during all of this. It shatters the car window. Skip ahead. Just really quick, if you get grossed out, the glass splinters in blinds blanch in one eye like it hits her in the eyes so They drive for 200 miles straight. So they get away, but they're in fucking rough shape. Bonnie's wounds look like child's play compared to Bucknow, who was shot in the head. I'm just picturing Bonnie with one leg. She does, she has a, she has two legs, but they're not working. This man doesn't have part of his head. Like, this man is not well. And now, Blanche is blind in one eye and can't see out of the other. Dude. I, no, it's a shitshow. So they end up in Dexter, Iowa, and they set up shop outside of an abandoned amusement park. Which I can't tell us if it's I just think, they just need to put in a little bit more effort. Like, it's just, no, it's chaos. There is no logic. It is run, murder, run, murder, run, murder, rob. Like, there's just no What's happened to Mr. W. B. Mason? W. D. Jones is still there. W. B. Mason. But I can't tell if setting up shop at an abandoned amusement park is, like, the creepiest thing or the smartest thing ever. Think of how creepy that is. Well, it would be if one person caught you. That would be immediate suspicious, but if not, then you're golden. However, as they were driving, they threw their clothes out the window that were covered in blood, uh, because Buck was obviously bleeding everywhere because he had a head wound. Within four days, the cops tracked them down. They got nearly 100 men to come capture these people. A mix of cops, local men who had guns, and National Guardsmen sneak up on the Barrows gang in the middle of the night. A shootout begins. Okay? Obviously unable to run, Buck is in such bad shape they buried a grave for him. They were like, he's gonna die at any second. He can't run. He gets shot a bunch. Blanche surrenders immediately because she can't fucking see. And she actually refused to leave Buck's side. They like tried to grab her. There's actually a really sad picture of her getting torn away from him. And she's scream crying. It's actually quite sad. So, WD half carries, half drags Bonnie through the bushes and hides. And Bonnie told her sister later that they heard gunfire and then just a long silence. And then she began to cry. she said something along the lines of, I wish I had a gun to die with Clyde. Or something like that. He fucking pops out of the bushes. He escapes. Dude. The three of them get away. No. I'm not kidding you. WD, Bonnie, and Clyde all live. A hundred, a hundred men. A hundred men. So Blanche and the near dead Buck at this point are with authorities. They're immediately hospitalized. Apparently they asked Buck. Where you wanted and he said, quote, everywhere I've been. Excellent response. I will say his mother was able to see him. She rushed to the hospital and he died a few days later. So he dies on July 30th, 1933. Blanche is sentenced to prison. She spends six years there. Like I said, she was blinded in that one eye for the rest of her life from that injury. So, W. D., Bonnie and Clyde are left. Things are not great. W. D. is starting to realize he wants out. He doesn't want to follow them into death or more pain or more running. He's just not about it. Throughout August, they go through all these back roads, they go to Nebraska, Minnesota, Mississippi. They pause in only the smallest of towns to steal fresh cars, money, gas, food, like the basics. They sleep in cars, they park in remote fields, woods, ravines. Could we get a disguise? How about this? I saw that that winter, Clyde realized he had not changed his clothes since his brother died. That is what they're living with. They also do another armory rob, so they have plenty of weapons again. They're fully stocked again. Great. However, W. D. does leave them. He said, quote, I left Clyde and Bonnie after they was healed up enough to get by without me. I'd had enough blood and hell. Good man, honestly. So he was like, I'm bouncing. He basically waited one night, They had just stolen a car and Clyde gave him money to go and get gas and come back and then he just didn't come back. That kind of thing. He like shut his lights off and hightailed it. Okay. So he went quietly into the good night? He does get arrested by police. He ends up going home to his mother. He stays on her farm for a bit. They arrest him and in order to receive a shorter sentence, No. WD renounces his fellow outlaws and claimed he was an unwilling participant. So there's a video of this and I tried to write it down, there were not subtitles. Come on, man. He gave this statement, quote, I have been indicted along with Clyde and Bonnie for the murder of Malcolm Davis, Fort Worth Deputy Sheriff. I was forced along a threat of death with Clyde Barrows in many of his gun battles and I saw him kill five men. Clyde Barrows never seemed to care for anyone, all he thought of was himself. That's the reason I tried to escape so he wouldn't kill me. So, he was really hard to understand, but that was the gist of it. What difference does it make at that point? You're already going to face some sort of consequence. Might as well be loyal. I think he knows that's not gonna end well. Okay. Got it. So Bonnie and Clyde are the only two left. They're making headlines. They're doing their thing. And on January 16th, 1934, Clyde makes good on his promise three years later. and tries to get Ray out of prison. So he has this mastermind of the breakout of the prison that he was at. Okay. And Clyde gets Hamilton's brother, Floyd, and some other guy to get guns. The guns are placed on a wood pile where the convicts could Easily get to them. Clyde parks nearby, he gets out, he leaves Bonnie behind the wheel, and he's like, when all of the shit goes down, lean on the horn so they know which direction to run in. You Because it's going to get ugly. So Clyde goes into a gully near the workers they wait for him to get set up and at 7 a. m. the gunfire begins. One guard and a local mayor are killed. Bonnie honks the horn so they know where to run and as she's sitting there, they're On the horn, Hamilton and four other prisoners escape to the car. One of the escapees was Henry Methvin. This ends up being a critical mistake for Bonnie and Clyde. He should have really let this one go, but he had this promise to his friend. He made this pact years ago. He was dead set on it. I don't think it was the time. I think we may have bigger problems. But, that's what they do. So they go to Texas and they're hanging out with Methvin when two state highway patrol officers on their motorcycles spot them. And now everybody fucking knows who they are. Get a disguise. Get a disguise. They murder them. Okay. Cool. Great. To make sure, because at this point the public still loves them, but the cops have had a fucking enough. And they want to turn the public against the couple. So that, so they say in the newspaper that Bonnie laughed maniacally as the patrolmen were shot and laid helplessly on the ground before she killed them. Apparently Bonnie was asleep in the back of the car and Methvin actually was the one who did it. But, even though this is false, it works, and the public perception of them is very, very bad. They also end up killing an old man named William Cal Campbell, and he was a constable, and a constable are police officers who are responsible for keeping the peace. So they're like Peacekeepers. Yeah. So they kill him. So now the American people are over it. Full bloodless for getting their two heads on a spike, right? And like I said, nail in the coffin, the cops have been out for blood this whole time. They put together a task force of the hardest law enforcement officers the state could find and start a full blown manhunt. The most famous was former Texas Ranger Frank Hamer. I think is how you say his name, Hamer. Frank wasn't known for tolerance. He had a kill streak, that's what he called it, of 53 people and he had injured 17 plus. If you have to keep track, I don't think you should be in that position. If you call it a kill streak, I don't love it. I don't love that energy. Uh, he set out alone to learn more about them, their habits, what they do, And he just wanted to learn as much about the two of them as he could. It took him a hundred and two days to track them down single handedly. And Bonnie and Clyde are continuing their spree, but what they don't know is Henry Methvin's family is working with police. And it has been argued how much they were involved, but it is said that for Bonnie and Clyde, they would give Henry full immunity. Like, we will hand them to you if you give our son immunity. Is Henry aware? I don't know. Okay, cool. Frank correctly suspected that the couple whose group had fallen to shit over the last few months would want to seek shelter on some sort of home ground, somewhere they felt comfortable with people they knew. They can't return to Dallas, but they can go to Methvin's farm as a, like, as a refuge. So, the Texas Rangers lay in wait for three days. Waiting for Bonnie and Clyde to show up at the Methvin farm. And on the morning of May 23rd, 1934, in unsuspecting, Bonnie and Clyde, driving down a country road, the cops have taken Methvin's truck and made it look broken down on the side of the road. Some reports say his father was actually standing next to the truck. Some say he wasn't there. Either way, there is a car there, police are everywhere surrounding it, hiding in the bushes. There's only one road to, so there's no way to, like, take a left and look around. He, he can't drive out of this one. They know Clyde drives like a lunatic, so they're hoping that the broken down truck or seeing the dad would slow him down a little bit. And so the moment the car slows down, cops open fire into the vehicle, spraying it with bullets. When officers were done emptying each of them, emptying their automatic weapons, they switched to pistols, multiple, to just make sure. There was absolutely no chance of survival in both Bonnie and Clyde die, Bonnie slumping over and leaning on Clyde in death. So, I'd skip ahead a bit if you get queasy, like I said, people, I don't understand people this time in this day and age. They hear what happened, they show up to the scene, people try to get souvenirs by stealing parts of the car, trying to cut off Bonnie's clothes, chunks of her hair, one guy tried to cut off one of Clyde's ears, and one tried to cut off his trigger finger. Leaning into the car, trying to cut actual things off of their body. Like, sell it on eBay? Legitimate phalanges, trying to be cut. I just don't fucking understand how that was ever acceptable. No. Ever. no wonder why there's fucking caution tape nowadays, Jesus, but the scene was Described as a bloody circus with the public acting like fucking wildebeests and in the car. They found this seven Colt 45 pistols one 32 caliber pistol one sawed off shotgun three Automatic rifles one double action Colt revolver one sawed off shot another different type of shotgun in one 380 caliber cold automatic pistol. I don't know if I read any of that, right? I don't know anything about guns, but that's what they found just in their car pews the pew pews You know them Dallas deputies who were at the ambush spoke about it later saying quote we wanted to take them alive But that was impossible. Oh, oh, did you? First of all, no, you fucking did it. There's a second of all your plan of attacks that otherwise you emptied the After emptying, there was a bunch of them, after emptying all of them, they're automatic, they switched to pistols. Like, on what planet? Anyway, so, something the two had always dreamed of. Even early on was that they would be buried side by side one day. Also, can we find new dreams at 19 and 20? Maybe, like, getting married, owning a home together, maybe having bebes. Getting a, like, get a dog. Yeah. Like, can we get jobs? I mean, I can't judge, but can we get a job? So how old were they when they died? That doesn't sound like a sprawling life. 1934 is when they died. 24 and 23? 23? Yeah, I think 24 and 23. Crazy. They were not buried side by side though. Bonnie's family did not want it that way. And thousands of thousands of people showed up to both funerals to see that the couple that they loved so much and also hated. Blanche and W. D. Jones both did their time. They came out, they lived, you know, semi normal lives. They would also both live long enough to see the 1967 movie, the now cult classic, Blanche Bonnie and Clyde for themselves and Blanche actually worked with writers and lead actor Warren Beatty to talk about what role she played and what her character was like. However, they changed her character and she went from like bravely devoted wife in her early 20s who wouldn't leave her husband's side and they changed it to whoever Raymond Hamilton's girlfriend was at the time and she won an Oscar for it. The woman. Her name's Estelle Parsons, and so she won Best Supporting Actress in 1968. And she said, Blanche said, quote, That movie made me look like a screaming horse's ass. So she was not thrilled. Clearly. WD was taken to a local drive in movie theater to see it with reporters. They took him. And when the movie ended, journalists were there to ask him how he felt about it, and he said, quote, It made it all look sort of glamorous, but like I told them teenagers sitting next to me at the drive in showing, take it from an old man who was there, it was hell, end quote. Before their death, Bonnie wrote a poem accurately predicting how the couple would die. It goes like this. They don't think they're too smart or desperate. They know that the law always wins. They've been shot at before, but they do not ignore it. The death is the wages of sin. Someday they'll go down together. They'll bury them side by side. To few it will be a grief. To the law, a relief. But it's death for Bonnie and Clyde. And that is the life and death of Bonnie and Clyde. Chills. Chills! And so I love them. My sources for today, Bonnie and Clyde, The Story of Love and Death, it's from Biography on YouTube. It's a great documentary. And The Most Evil Crime Couple in American History, The Infographics Show, also on YouTube. Loved it. So, yeah, I mean it's, how do you feel now that you've heard the whole story? I just, I think they could have gone about it a little bit differently. love their passion though. Love that for them. Looking for my Clyde. With ten toes. And, I just can't get over that. I know. But yeah, they're fucked. For sure. They definitely could have been a little bit more thought into that, but maybe if they weren't like 20. I mean, we don't have to kill people. We don't have to kill cops. We don't have to kill. I think it must have been incredibly hard. to grow up with nothing, the only thing that you know works is crime, so you do the thing that you know that works, then you're thrown in prison, then you get out, then you're a convict in the depression, and the only way you have ever made money is crime, then you pair it with other confli convicts. I mean, it's just They were set up to fail. They were set up to fail. I obviously don't condone murder. I can understand why someone in the Great Depression goes towards crime. Not murder, but crime in general to just not be fucking hungry all the time. Kill or be killed. Yeah, they just, they really felt like they had no other choice. And he tried. There were aspects where he was like, I want to be on the straight and narrow. I don't want to go back to prison. I want to live a normal life. But yeah, once, once the first couple murders happened, it was all fucking downhill from there. Yeah. That was crazy. Yeah. Isn't that wild? That is wild. I knew that they were a couple in love and outlaws who died brutally, but I didn't know anything about his background or her background. Or the fact that they escaped like literally six times. Yeah, or how often, and I don't even, I didn't even go over every single one. Yeah. Imagine how pissed the cops must have been. They'd be like this, oh, they're at it again. Yeah, like they fucking escaped us again. They've murdered more cops, like what in the ever loving fuck. So yeah, that's Bonnie and Clyde. I love that poem though. Yeah, chills. Chills. To have a love so strong, to kill for. I have some sillies. I'm ready for some positive stories. They're not actually sillies, but positive stories. Hold on one second. Let me just pull them up real quick. Also, how do you feel about Hinge? Voice prompts. Uh, they disgust me. I was so curious because I just saw you close the app. I thought you would like them because you love a voice memo, but I can also understand why they would give you the ick. Oh, absolutely not. Yeah. Absolutely not. Okay. I have, a few little, little baby stories, quick and easy, from 20 bite sized stories of humanity that will make you think, smile, and cry. Oh, wow. It's from this, uh, markandangel. com. I think it's like a blog. Sure. Okay. Cool. I have four of them. So, bear with me. Love it. It's been exactly ten years since my controlling, abusive ex fiance sold my favorite guitar, which cost almost 2, 000. Oh my god! That took me ages to save for. He sold it on the day I broke up with him. When I went to pick up my belongings, he was proud that he had sold it to a local pawn shop. Luckily, I managed to track down the guy who had bought it from the pawn shop. The guy was really sweet, and he gave it back to me for free, on the condition that I join him on his front porch for an hour and play guitar with him. He grabbed a second guitar, and we ended up sitting there on his porch for the rest of the afternoon playing music, talking, and laughing. He's been my husband for almost nine years now. Stop. Stop it right now. So cute. Oh my god, I love it so much. The world works in mysterious ways. That's so beautiful. Oh, I love it. Another one. Today on my 47th birthday, I re read the death note I wrote on my 27th birthday about two minutes before my girlfriend showed up at my apartment and told me I'm pregnant. Oh my god. She was honestly the only reason I didn't follow through with it. Suddenly I felt I had something to live for. Today, she's my wife, and we've been happily married for 19 years. And my daughter, who is now a 19 year old college student, has two younger brothers as well. I reread my death note every year on my birthday as a reminder to be thankful, and I am thankful. I got a second chance at life. Oh my god. I love that one. I know. That's a really good one. This is just four of the 20 of them. They made me so sad, but also happy. Like warm and fuzzies. Yeah, for real. Oh God. I love positive stories. Today after my daughter's funeral and several hours of of tearful soul searching, I started going through my phone and deleting two weeks worth of condolence messages. There were so many of them that I eventually deleted, hit delete. All but one message didn't delete it was one of the last messages. My daughter left me before she died, and it was still marked as new. Sometimes my voicemail forces me to listen to old messages before I can delete them, so I played it even though I didn't want to at that moment. My daughter said, Hey dad, I just wanted to let you know I'm okay and I'm home now. What are the odds? Oh, wow. Isn't that creepy? Oh, I really like it though. Yeah. That must have been, I mean, that's probably, So comforting. So heart wrenching, but very comforting. Ugh. I mean, so relatable. The condolences. Ugh, brutal. Copy paste. Like, cause you're just, cause you're just scrolling, no, when someone dies in your family and you're just getting so many of them, and you just go to scroll to find someone, and the last 50 are like, I'm so sorry, I'm like, oh my god, send me, please send me a meme after so the last time I look it's not the last thing you wrote. Send me a chicken finger. Just kidding. My last one is, It's been five years since my mom, my best friend in the world, was in a car accident that resulted in her losing all of her long term memory from before the crash. Oh my god. I can't even fucking imagine. The brain is so wild. Yeah, it really is. It really creeps me out, honestly. Yeah. Yeah, fair. When I was little my mom and I used to quote a Winnie the Pooh book as an inside joke. One of us would ask, Have you ever seen a dragonfly? And the other would reply, I have, I have seen a dragonfly. This evening I was sitting with her while we were watching TV, and I randomly out of the blue asked, have you ever seen a dragonfly? And she responded with, I have, I have seen a dragonfly. We stared at each other for a prolonged moment and she just jumped out of her seat and exclaimed, oh my god, I remember, and cried. Oh my god. I'm so upset! Oh my god. Those are all my lots of stories. Oh my god. Making me fail all sorts of ways. The Tingleys. Very well done, Colleen. Hey, thanks. Ma'am. You well done. I gotta look up the Bonnie and Clyde song after this. I can't remember what it is. Stuck in the moment? Oh, yeah. This song came out so fucking long ago. It's in the lyrics. That's all you need to know. Stuck in the moment. He's a bebe in this. Justin Bieber comparing something to Bonnie and Clyde. Like, please. Oh man. I mean, Beyonce and Jay Z did it. That's true. That is true. Anyway, I hope you have a wonderful, oh wait, what? In case you want to giggle. Yeah, always. I knew a girl in high school that like made a reference to like her and her boyfriend at the time to be like Beyonce and Jay Z and then she made a Bonnie and Clyde reference too. Nice. Just like, I hate people. I, in middle school, was dating a boy, I have many nicknames, one of them being B. The letter B. And at the beginning of the song, he goes, You ready, B? Let's go get them. And I used to have like a 12 year old boyfriend who would say that to me. And I was like, Okay, cute. Let's bring it back. All I need in this life of sin is me and my girlfriend. I also love Beyonce's Texas Hold'em song. I fuckin love it. The thing is, I don't love it, but it's so catchy that I god, it's so catchy. It's so fun. I can't wait for the rest of it. In Texas, they hold'em. That's all I got. Alright, everybody. Well, we hope you have a wonderful week. Yeah, we do. We hope you, uh, don't seek out a life of crime, and you don't murder anyone. Bare minimum. Slay the day away. And if you do, I hope you drive fast, and I hope you're armed to the teeth, because that's the only way it's working out. Okay, everyone, have a wonderful week. Love you, mean it. Love you, mean it. Bye. Bye.

Bridget:

This podcast was produced by me. Bridget, Shannon. Music is written and performed by Matt You can find his band super Stoker anywhere you listen to music.

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