Sippin' with the Shannons
Sippin' with the Shannons
Power of the Pussior
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On this week’s episode, Bridget and Colleen finally stopped rotting and went out into the world again! Colleen is shooketh by Sean Kingston and prom proposals are getting completely out of hand. Then we get into the topic of the week... BAD ASS WOMEN FROM HISTORY! Or in this case, herstory. Hear the stories of the unsung heroes Frances Marion, Deborah Sampson, Dorothy Lawrence, Florence Nightingale and Sybil Ludington. You may not know them but you will LOVE them! They are definitely a slay.
Sources:
- 17 Women Who Made History - That You've Never Heard Of - Refinery29
- Deborah Sampson - National Women's History Museum
- Deborah Sampson Cross Dresses to Fight the British - Drunk History Episode
- Florence Nightingale - History.com
- Florence Nightingale Revolutionizes Nursing - Drunk History Episode
- Wikipedia
Review and subscribe! You can find us on Instagram @Sippinwiththeshannons or send us your stories at Sippinwiththeshannons@gmail.com. Love you, mean it.
Pour me a glass of rosé, I'll make it a Chardonnay, Come on, we're sippin with the Shannons. Oh, if it's Riesling Rainbow or a Pinot Grigio, You know we're sippin with the Shannons.
Speaker 2When did we transition into there always being a song at the beginning?
Speaker 3You've been doing it because of your severe ADHD.
Speaker 2I think I just didn't know how to make an intro and I get nervous. Well,
Speaker 3usually when we come in here and we start doing just like a quick mic check, you immediately burst into song like we are at CMA Fest and it's your time to shine.
Speaker 2I saw a rumor today. A rumor? That B. O. B. died. Colleen. But he didn't. It was just a rumor. So don't believe it. Oh, thank God.
Speaker 3I was gonna be very upset. Got one rolled up
Speaker 2in my head, bam. You know that song?
Speaker 3Of course I know. I know every word to that song. Okay, well. If they played that at karaoke, I would absolutely demolish
Speaker 2someone. So I played it in the car, like, in Tribute. He's not dead. He's not dead.
Speaker 4You
Speaker 2were like RIP. You a
Speaker 4real one. How about you? You sing
Speaker 2for us? Shout for
Speaker 5Got in my headband. Turn it in. The headband cushion. My lungs got catch in my sweat glands.
Speaker 4That should have all better than the next round, babe. I think he wrote that about us
Speaker 3Yeah. Again, we're having a pit bull. White girls singing on a bachelorette party moment. This is exactly what
Speaker 4I'm talking
Speaker 3about. Oh Anyway, hi everyone. Hey, welcome to this week's episode of sipping with the Shannon's We're cousins and each week we sit down we sip on some wine. We talk some shit. We have a good giggle I'm Bridget Shannon, and I'm Colleen
Speaker 2Shannon
Speaker 3It always dips down.
Speaker 4You're like, and going. And it's just like, and I'm here too. I am also here.
Speaker 2Against my
Speaker 4will.
Speaker 2I'm
Speaker 4chained underneath
Speaker 2this table.
Speaker 4Blink, blink twice if you're being held hostage. I'm just
Speaker 2kidding.
Speaker 4Let the people know.
Speaker 2I'm here willingly. I'm just kidding.
Speaker 3How was your weekend? You love this room. How dare you? I do. It's cozy central. How was my weekend? My weekend was great. I saw you. Yeah, you did. So Paul and I, my bestie Paul and I, are like, let's go to the seaport, let's bop around, let's find a good spot. I'm like, you know what I love is the legal harborside deck. It's not a rooftop, but it's a, it's a deck and it's a really nice open air, uh, open with the water in the back. It's just a vibe. And so we go and then we never left.
Speaker 2No, you didn't. No, you didn't.
Speaker 3And I want to be very clear about something. I got there at 3 p. m. And Colleen texts me at 4 30 because she's obviously tracking my location and she says, Hey, are you at legal harborside? And I'm like, yeah, I am. And she goes, great. See you there around five 30 ish. What time did you strut in Colleen? Probably like seven 30.
Speaker 2Yep. Well, so I mean, two hours. I don't, I can't control. I said, I was just in my brain was thinking, Oh, maybe that'd be great if I saw you in passing. Like I was just like, I didn't assume we were like,
Speaker 3you were like, I will see you there. Well, if you were still there. We'll be there around 5. 30. Yeah, that wasn't. And you said it at 4. 30, so I was like, oh, of course I'm going to stay an hour if I can see Colleen and her girlfriends. 7. 30. My bad, boys. 7 fucking 30. Now, mind you, I was chit chatting away.
Speaker 2Don't wait up, mom. Because my friend from
Speaker 3high school, Alyssa, walked in with her boyfriend, and I was like, oh my god, hello. And so we chatted with her for a while, but it was so funny. Also, we had a bartender. Who just looks like she's been working there for years. The busboy was new. I watched her ream this poor kid out 17 times but the thing was she's one of those bartenders you can tell is really good at her job Yeah, because she was getting food removed off of people's Receipts like their orders. She's like, let me take that off for you. That took forever. One of our drinks took forever. She gave me and Paula a free shot. Sly. So she's one of those people who's like, I got you. But behind the counter, everyone's nightmare. Good for the customer. You know what I mean? Not for the people. And I was just like, I feel like I know this woman. I feel like as someone who worked in the restaurant industry forever, I feared her. And I may have become her. We know her. We love her. We fear her.
Speaker 4We fear her.
Speaker 3Uh, but yeah. It was so much fun. I got to hang out with you and all your friends. Yeah. And then, because I had been there literally all day, when you guys were like, we're gonna go somewhere else now, I was like, I'm gonna go to bed. Which is the difference in our ages. I start earlier and
Speaker 2you go out later. Yeah, the walk in of me, like, dead sober to you not is, was, was different. It's a different vibe, for sure. Yeah. I did rip a couple shots before I left the house, so I, like, was a little bit buzzed, so I can't lie, but, like, I was not on level. No, I was four and a
Speaker 3half hours in and you were on hour one. Mm hmm. We had a grand old time.
Speaker 2Yeah. We did. Yeah. What were your thoughts on, what were your thoughts? We'd, I would feel like I always go out with your friends. Not always, but like if I was to go out, like I'd be like, Oh my God,
Speaker 3I love her friends. I've, well, I feel like I know them. Like it's not really a,
Speaker 2that's true. That's true. Do you know
Speaker 3what I mean? It's not this big game changer of like, Whoa, I was not, I expected everything that I got
Speaker 2because I don't shut the fuck up ever.
Speaker 3Well, no, I just, we talk about them all the time.
Speaker 2So you just felt like as though I was at peace. I was like, I feel like I,
Speaker 3I know everybody here. Right. Right.
Speaker 2That's fair. They probably feel the same way about you.
Speaker 3Yeah. One of them said it to me. I forget who it was. I was like, I feel like I know you. Well, Molly introduced, I was like, do not introduce yourself to me. Like I don't know exactly who you are and your entire family tree.
Speaker 2True. I don't think they know that, like how much I share. So they're probably like, what? I'm like, no, no, no, no. She knows your brother, your father, everything about you guys, where you work,
Speaker 3everything.
Speaker 2Personality
Speaker 3traits. For real. On Sunday, I went to a one year old's birthday party. Our
Speaker 4cousins.
Speaker 3Our cousins, Sean and Patty. Teddy turned one, and so they had a whole baseball themed birthday party. It was so cute. It was in this hall. Patty is just so, every detail was there, like every, they had baseballs, the food was baseball themed. She's so cute. Like she just had all the things there because she's just on top of it. There was this one big inflatable baseball that was the size of a human child. Take a five year old human child. And little Matt, our cousin's son, little Matt, is. Running around pushing this thing, right? No woman or child was safe. I saw little Matt take out at least seven kids.
Speaker 8Good
Speaker 3for him. And what was so funny about it, In aging from every range like they were barely standing up on their own to like six He was he was he was a bowling ball Like he was mowing people down and I could not stop laughing It was fucking hilarious and all the kids would like get up and giggle cuz it's an inflatable ball. It doesn't weigh anything He's he was in a bouncy house and everyone was on land. I'm like So he's running around and our cousin Tommy says to his daughter Aurora, she's getting upset. He's like, Aurora, use your words. What do you want kid? And she says something about little Matt with the ball. And he's like, are you saying you want it? Because all you have to say is Matt, can I have a turn? And then daddy's going to kick him in the shit and get the ball for you. So
Speaker 4he says like, daddy's going to steal it for you or something. So Matt, little Matt comes bowling
Speaker 3down the bend, like down a runway. Tommy waits at the end. And I just think he's going to step in front of him and like stop in his tracks. He wound up his foot, like Lyle Lomessy, kicked the ball
Speaker 4into little Matt. Little Matt goes down on the ground, starts dying, laughing, and he picked up the ball and handed it to Aurora. And I
Speaker 3fucking laughed. This is his uncle, by the way. And he was totally fine. We left my, just for clarification, my mother had her legs crossed. We were laughing so hard. Like he wound up
Speaker 8to a toddle.
Speaker 3I did. died. And then he threw little Matt over his shoulder and they were all giggling and it was hilarious. But like, it was like watching, I don't know if any of you remember the part of the hangover where the little kid finally has the taser and it's like slow motion. They're looking at each other as he walks up. It was so fucking funny. It kind of reminded me in four Christmases where she finally gets into the moon bounce and she's like ready to fuck some up. Like no one's getting hurt, but she's tossing people. Drop
Speaker 9it.
Speaker 3Yeah, it was fucking hilarious. Damn. Those are really all the updates I had.
Speaker 2I, I told a bold faced lie on the last episode.
Speaker 3What?
Speaker 2Because I said I would have so, like, so many, like, little stories. I was doing so much this week and I'd have such good tea. I have nothing to present.
Speaker 3Well, I think that's sometimes a good thing, it just means you went out without any problems like they're oh my god I was across the by a man on a bicycle with a helmet on the other day. What do you mean? Okay, so I was coming from my mother's house at the end of the street At the end of the hill is a really busy street, like a really, really busy street. And unless you are pulling out halfway into the street, you are not getting out. No one is allowing you to pass. Would you agree with that? Correct. During certain times of the day?
Speaker 10Yep.
Speaker 3Friday afternoon. I pull out so I'm over the crosswalk I'm not in the street, but I'm waiting for the moment I'll be able to turn and I'm gonna take it and he got mad that he couldn't just bike straight across and he had to go around my car and I couldn't hear him because I Was listening to musicals very loudly He was screaming at me.
Speaker 2The drama. Because he
Speaker 3had to go around my car because I was through the crosswalk.
Speaker 2Suburbia issues. On
Speaker 3one of the busiest intersections next to a highway. I'm like, my guy. But I was like, what is happening? My problems
Speaker 2are bigger than yours right now, brother.
Speaker 3Cyclists! Just keep to yourselves.
Speaker 2Every time you get on that
Speaker 8bike, you make yourself susceptible to these types of situations. So you know what? This is your fucking fault. Move it around.
Speaker 3It's just one of those crosswalks you, there's no way to turn into the street unless you're over it.
Speaker 2Yes, correct. There's literally no way. There's no way. You can't even
Speaker 3see. No, you can't even get, you can't even see who's coming from the left. If you're before it.
Speaker 2I have never in my life been like, Oh, am I on the crosswalk? Who does that? Who does that? Seriously?
Speaker 3Well, I would just. Go behind like I just don't care to just go behind the car
Speaker 2Just like what's the be
Speaker 3screaming at me?
Speaker 2Also if I'm walking I go around I go behind the car I don't go in front when
Speaker 3I walk I go behind all the time But I'm talking behind my car yelled Got to the side of my car yelled and yelled as he went away Like not just a one and done like while he circled the car to go around me.
Speaker 2He has a micropenis
Speaker 3for sure This is the new was he wearing a
Speaker 2helmet?
Speaker 3Yeah. Oh, yeah. And the corny glasses.
Speaker 2Oh, he's done for.
Speaker 3And it's giving the energy of somebody who revs their engine in like a hot red Lamborghini, but worse.
Speaker 2Yes. He's got a hard on for his bike for sure. Yeah.
Speaker 3Get a grip, my guy. So yeah, that's how I got accosted.
Speaker 2That's crazy.
Speaker 3And I've just been watching a lot of Abbott Elementary. And other than that.
Speaker 2Jail time. Jail time. The
Speaker 3man on the bike. Jail time. Yeah.
Speaker 2Yeah, not for watching Abbot Elementary.
Speaker 3What about you? How was your weekend?
Speaker 2Um, I did nothing other than see you at legals, and then I went to a, like a speakeasy type of thing. I don't really know. It's all very blurry after the eagles, to be honest with you. Oh. Okay. so I don't really have much to say after that. And then I worked, and I worked, and I worked my life away. I have two things to say. Okay. Well, actually, a couple more things. I just lied. Sure. I am in my audiobook era. Yeah, I love
Speaker 3audiobook.
Speaker 2I've never listened to one before.
Speaker 3Really?
Speaker 2It's like a podcast in your ears when you don't feel like reading and your eyes hurt.
Speaker 3That's how I solely listen to books.
Speaker 2I didn't know you could do that.
Speaker 3Colleen.
Speaker 2No, like, I listen to seven hours of a book in the past 24 hours.
Speaker 3What book?
Speaker 2Uh. And if it's not A Court of Thorns and Roses, why? It's not. This one I already had in my queue. So I just like, because I was just trying to test it out. I'm like, I don't know if I like it. And they're British voices. So I don't know. I feel like if I don't like the voice, I won't finish the book.
Speaker 3People have said if I don't like the voice, it is harder to read. I love when they're British. I actually find it an easier read, but please continue.
Speaker 2Yes, what Lies Between Us. It's a thriller. I'm not really sure what's happening yet. And I'm 43 percent through ze book.
Speaker 3Is it by John Mars? Yes. Yeah. That's the one. I'm surprised you're just doing this now because of how often you're in the car. Yeah, I don't know why. Because that's what I do on all of my
Speaker 2I've never thought of it. Ever. It's either a book or
Speaker 3podcast
Speaker 2but a book. It's even
Speaker 3better. Bitch.
Speaker 2It's even better.
Speaker 4No, like Welcome to the party fucking two decades late.
Speaker 2Like, I am Every minute of the day I have a plan. It's great. It's great! I'm gonna read so many books now! Read, quote unquote, read. I'm gonna listen to so many books. Except I did listen by accident. I, uh, sat outside at work today in my beach chair and I accidentally fell asleep. I fell asleep and were in a beach chair outside of my office. Like, on camera, while I woke up and my mouth was fuzzy. And I didn't know what day it was, what year it was, none of the above. And I listened to an hour of my book by accident. That I didn't
Speaker 3listen to because I was. So you slept for an hour. I believe so. Okay, well it is better than the time you fell asleep at your desk that people regularly come to visit. Do you know what I mean? Like I feel like outside in the sun makes sense.
Speaker 2And then my, my coworker heard me snoring. So like that wasn't cute. I've also fallen asleep in the bathroom, but that was on purpose.
Speaker 3You were hungover that time though, right?
Speaker 2No. But I've definitely fallen asleep hungover. That was under the desk. Yes. That's what I'm thinking. No one found me. No one found me for hours. I'm a five star employee. I belong in the payroll. Employee of
Speaker 3the month!
Speaker 2In fact, give me a raise. I'm also in my green bean era.
Speaker 3What the fuck does that even mean? I don't know, I've
Speaker 2just been eating green beans this weekend. A new
Speaker 3hyper fixation?
Speaker 2Maybe. Is it
Speaker 3the crunch?
Speaker 2Yeah.
Speaker 3That makes sense. I think that might be what it is.
Speaker 2I tried overnight oats. Not for me. Did you get my snap today?
Speaker 3I did. You didn't answer. I saw it one hour ago.
Speaker 2You didn't answer.
Speaker 3I didn't know every one of your snaps needed a response.
Speaker 2Yeah, you're, yes, that's what you, Oh, I don't,
Speaker 3I don't do that. You know,
Speaker 2and half the time when you answer my Snapchats, like, I don't even remember what I sent. Yeah. Because it's
Speaker 3been that
Speaker 2long. Well, it's
Speaker 3not my fault you have the brain of Dory from Finding Nemo. Do you have notifications on? No. I barely use Snapchat, if at all. That's
Speaker 2crazy. You're old.
Speaker 3Sometimes I find Snapchats you sent me three days ago, and I'm like
Speaker 2It's just like, then when you respond, I don't even know what I sent. I'm like, I'm That was a thousand snaps ago. That's
Speaker 3not my mode of communication. If you'd like to reach me, try other methods. Is this
Speaker 2a boundary?
Speaker 3No, it's factual. I just simply don't use it. So if you would
Speaker 4like me to respond, text it to me. You douche canoe.
Speaker 2Um, I watched a movie that I think you'd be proud of. Sure. I think it's like a classic, not classic, but like unlike me. Oh really? I don't know if it's classic. You'll probably be like unimpressed. Just tell
Speaker 3me what it the fuck is.
Speaker 2I just want to preset it, okay? Blended. I watched Blended.
Speaker 3Oh my god. Drew Barrymore. Yeah. In Adam.
Speaker 2Yeah.
Speaker 3It's so cute. It's so ridiculous.
Speaker 2Why do I need a husband that is a dick sporting goods manager? They go to Africa. They go to Africa, they're like riding the ostriches or whatever, the dodo birds. So
Speaker 3what'd you think?
Speaker 2It was cute. It gave the woman Buzzies Bella Thorn. I might have cried at the end a little bit and like, I just really don't like those feelings. I just don't like them. I only like them with books.
Speaker 3Bella Thorn.
Speaker 2Yeah. I hate her. I'd be hating. I'd be hating, but she's making a comeback. Have you seen her recently to the list? Oh yeah, she's on there. Why? She's just weird. Looks like she needs to be cleaned. This is a fact. You've never seen someone that you're like, I just, I feel like I wanna scrub you clean.
Speaker 3I could give a flying fuck, Colleen. I just don't think
Speaker 4that way. I just don't have a list of people I want to clean. Honestly, other than you. Your fucking fungus feet.
Speaker 2I don't have fungus feet. She was touching my toes
Speaker 3on the couch earlier. That's
Speaker 2a rumor that you started.
Speaker 3Colleen, you had something green on your toe. You were wiping everywhere.
Speaker 2That was from my shoe. My sandal. What's in your sandal? I dunno. A fungus, a gunk, a mystery gunk
Speaker 3touching my feet earlier.
Speaker 2Ugh. Did you ever read the Junie b Jones books when you were little?
Speaker 3It rings a bell. I don't remember off the top of my head though.
Speaker 2Well, as I get older, I just, I get her, you know, that's all you need to know. And
Speaker 3those who know no what that means. Okay. Well, I'm glad you watched Blended. I did watch blended. That's a, that's a good one.
Speaker 2I, it's a
Speaker 3silly one.
Speaker 2I am trying to be a rom-com girl. It's just not really working in my favor, not loving it. It's okay. I gotta get back to Spooky, but I guess Summer's okay for rom coms.
Speaker 3Have you ever watched Pretty Woman? Mmm. Mm hmm. Mm hmm, mm hmm, mm hmm.
Speaker 2Um, I also watched Derry Girls. I'm on, like, episode five.
Speaker 3Ugh. Tell me your thoughts. Tell me everything.
Speaker 2My thoughts are Nicola Coughlin is that bitch. Yep. Also, I didn't really notice until I watched a recent interview of how different all of her accents are on purpose. Between Bridgerton, her real voice, and also Nicola Coughlin because like obviously they have all different accents within Ireland and also like in England. In
Speaker 3England,
Speaker 2yeah. Um, I don't know what they're saying half the fucking time, but I still laugh. You have to put the
Speaker 3subtitles on.
Speaker 2But I still laugh. No, it doesn't matter, like I'm like, I don't get what you're saying.
Speaker 3It's so fucking funny.
Speaker 2So funny. Um,
Speaker 3Sister Michael. Sister Michael is the funniest part of Gary Girls.
Speaker 2That's fair. I, her family, um, Erin's family dynamic literally kills me. The last one I just watched. Well,
Speaker 3it's being at our grandparents house when we were kids. Yes,
Speaker 2100%. And then she's like, it's like, the equivalent of them going to like the, whatever the restaurant is to get like the fish and chips is like us going to Sammy's. Yeah. But someone being like, you think that'll be enough? I think you should get five pounds. Someone walks in and is like, you got to get six pounds. What are you talking about? Someone else comes in and is like, you think that'll be enough? And then the dad's like, what the fuck? Like, that is us. Also, the father,
Speaker 3the father hates the son in law. Yes. He's actually a comedian in real life, too. So he was actually yeah, it it is so fucking good. And it just keeps getting better.
Speaker 2I just love that Michelle's just like, fuck off, every two seconds. Oh, Michelle.
Speaker 3And they hate James, but they also love James.
Speaker 2That, I just watched one where the priest called him an asshole. He's like, you're an asshole. Because he's English. Oh, the poor kid.
Speaker 3Yeah, it's so good.
Speaker 2I watched the idea of you. What'd you, what'd you think? I didn't love the ending. Like I just didn't love. Really? I don't know. Something was off. Something was off. I can't pinpoint it with words. I did cry at the end, so I shouldn't say I didn't like the ending. I did cry when she like sees him and just like that feeling of like, when you just like find home again and like, Oh, you know,
Speaker 4it made you feel too many things. It made me feel
Speaker 2too many things. Like I could see that happening in a book, like, which I know it was a book. Right. Wasn't it a book? Yeah, it was
Speaker 4a
Speaker 11book.
Speaker 2Um, Yeah, I wish I'd read it first. That's all.
Speaker 11But I
Speaker 2love Anne Hathaway. Like, she could just, she is timeless. She does not age. Her collarbones are insane. I did not find him attractive. Aaron found him very attractive. I just can't get over, like, he is a person. I, all I would see was like his pop star moves. Like they kept giving me the ick and I just was like, I was a direction and I am, you know, I'm getting Ed out. So what does that, what does that tell you? Yeah,
Speaker 3there were a few things. I was like,
Speaker 2August the moon. Also like, tell your fucking daughter also like, kind of selfish of you to just like be bopping around in a different land. Like, and then you're like, oh, I loved
Speaker 3it. I was like, fucking get it girl. She's at camp. I know. Why can't she live a little? But
Speaker 2then she's like all upset when she comes back. When people find out what the fuck did you expect? What'd you expect? But no, I
Speaker 3hate when the, when her daughter starts getting. Bullied at school. I'm like this is and she's like I have to end things with him. Oh, it's so sad
Speaker 2Yeah, and then she just lays on the couch and like watches him.
Speaker 3Yeah, that hurts hurts
Speaker 2sidebar. Sean Kingston was arrested with his mother. What are the updates about these
Speaker 3random humans?
Speaker 2Because I saw it, uh, TikTok about it and I was like, holy shit, we must unpack this. Sean Kingston and his mother stole more than a million dollars through fraud. Imagine that Sean Kingston. I was gonna say those, those royalties haven't held him over. Uh, him, 34, and his 61 year old mother, Janice, have been charged with conducting an organized scheme to defraud, grand theft, identity theft, and all other related crimes. Holy
Speaker 3shit. That's like an operation. That's not even like a No, yeah,
Speaker 2he also rents his Florida mansion. He doesn't even own anything. He's out here scamming people.
Speaker 3Wait, what the fuck?
Speaker 2Yeah, isn't that crazy? I had to, I had to bring this up. It's actually quite, quite insane. Yeah, they stole like 50, 000, 500, 000 in jewelry, 200, 000 from Bank of America. 160, 000 from an Escalade dealer because he's promising all these things like at one point I saw that he like promised Justin Bieber like cameo He's like
Speaker 3I'll get you the money later Like pay me and I'll get you the cameo or whatever and then just never does it. Yes, cuz
Speaker 2he was on No, I remember the song. Yeah Eeny, meeny, miny, moe, fraud! Um, yeah. He induces them into giving him really expensive things. Like, yeah, no shit. That's crazy. The company's attorney says Bieber has no involvement. Kingston has been using his name falsely.
Speaker 3Holy shit. Yep. That's even his mom's isn't on it. Yeah. His mom's in on
Speaker 2it. She was in jail before, like for a year and a half. Oh, okay. They're not doing well. And he's out here renting a mansion. It sounds like you need to get your priorities straight, Mr. Sean, Mr. Kingston, Mr. Kingston. Can we talk about prom reveals? Have you seen them on Tik TOK?
Speaker 3There is nobody who does prom reveals better than the black community. Everyone is out here. Just walking out a front door. They have choreo. They have speakers. They have every family member filming. It's like, everyone is iconic.
Speaker 2Did you see the Cinderella one the other day? Did I send you?
Speaker 3No.
Speaker 2Oh, I'll show you it right now because it's that funny. and the first, the first comment is literally like, does Fast Food know that they are doing this? What? Isn't that fucked up? Every day I wake up and I find a crazier one, and I'm like, holy shit, these people must, they're out here wildin
Speaker 3One release doves into the sky.
Speaker 2I did see that. Oh, here we go. Found it.
Speaker 3Are headlining the concert, who have less theatrics than that video just had.
Speaker 2I know, it's crazy.
Speaker 3I love it. Have your moment. Be a princess for a day, who cares? Who cares? Who cares? I think it's insane. Well, no, it is insane, but also, like, who cares? I guess. You're right. I mean, I'm also not a big gender reveal girly. I think those have gotten completely out of hand.
Speaker 8Please. I can't. I saw
Speaker 3a guy doing it with dumbbells the other day and when he released the dumbbell it fell and I was just like,
Speaker 8jail time,
Speaker 3gang, what are we doing here? Or I just hate seeing when the dads are pissed it's another girl. Do you know what I mean when people get like pissed about the gender? Yeah.
Speaker 2Hate.
Speaker 3Hate, hate, hate, hate, hate, hate.
Speaker 2No. I just, it's too much. While you're
Speaker 3at a party in front of all of your loved ones being recorded as you stab balloons because you're mad about the gender of your child.
Speaker 2No. I can't imagine gathering people to be like, does the thing growing inside of me have a penis or vagina? Like, I just can't imagine gathering for everybody.
Speaker 3Yeah. I think for your first friend or your first sibling or whoever it might be who has one, it's a big deal. Yeah. After that, it's just like, just tell me what the fuck it is.
Speaker 2Yeah. Like, I don't, I don't care.
Speaker 3Yeah.
Speaker 2That's all.
Speaker 3Alrighty.
Speaker 2Anything else? Uh, no. I think after, you know, Sean Kingston, I think I'm good there.
Speaker 3Oh, okay. Sean Kingston and proms.
Speaker 2Yep. That's all I wanted to touch base about today.
Speaker 3Great. So the topic of the day is badass women from history.
Speaker 2Oh, damn. We're two for two on our historical. Cool.
Speaker 3Yes. Look at us go. Look at us being all historical.
Speaker 2We're such historical baddies.
Speaker 3Historians.
Speaker 5Some would say. We're rewriting history. Herstory. No, that makes me sick. No, we
Speaker 3all say that, especially RuPaul. Oh, we do? Yeah. Oh. They say it in six all the time, the musical. Oh. It's herstory. Oh, you're right,
Speaker 2they do say herstory in six. Yeah, fuck
Speaker 3off.
Speaker 2Sorry. I, I retract my statement. Yeah, good. I thought you just like said that to like B, and I was like, don't. No. Okay, then it's fine.
Speaker 3Fetch has already happened. I'm not trying to make it happen. Good.
Speaker 2I want to talk about three baddies today. Ooh. Power to the Poussoir. Mm hmm. Mm
Speaker 7hmm. Mm hmm. Mm hmm. That's the
Speaker 2theme of this. Power to the Poussoir. Um, the first bitch I'm about to talk about, first baddie, her name is Frances Marion. Okay, great. Do you know Miss Girl? No, I don't. No, you don't? Okay, cool. Miss Marion was born Marion Benson Owens. I have no idea where Frances came from, says nothing about that, but that was her, her out of the womb name. Okay? Okay. She was born in San Francisco in November of 1888. Like a time that I can't even grasp. She's a bright young gal. She's awesome. Different from all the rest of the gals in her class, she dropped out of school at age 12 because she was caught drawing a cartoon strip of her teacher. Um, an article wrote about her, an article I believe is from Refinery, said, quote, She was suspended from elementary school when she was 12 for drawing satiric, is it satiric? Satiric pictures of her teacher and was sent to St. Margaret's Hall, a private boarding school in San Mateo. So like, was sent away for being silly.
Speaker 3Yeah, how dare you be creative. Yes.
Speaker 2But in like the 1880s, it was like, no, you breed and like, I don't know. So yeah, that's
Speaker 3when they beat left handed people. So yeah, adds up tracks.
Speaker 2Another thing about dairy girls that I appreciated was she's like, Oh, I don't want to wear this mom. And she's like, get the wooden spoon. I'm like, bring it back. Honestly. I mean, like, don't beat your children, but like get the wooden spoon back. People would be, some people need to be disciplined. Yeah. Um, at 16, she was transferred to Mark Hopkins art Institute in San Francisco, Where her skills were better suited, where she could happily make fun of teachers with, in cartoons, if she wished. Sure. she attended this school until 1904, but the school was destroyed by a fire. It was a whole thing. It was after the big San Francisco earthquake, which I looked up was an 8. 3 on the scale, which is like literally the highest.
Speaker 3It's high.
Speaker 2Yeah. Real high. It's like mass destruction and shit.
Speaker 3Yeah.
Speaker 2So her school went, bye bye. Oh. Yeah. another quote from that same article, in 1906, she married her 19 year old instructor from the Art Institute, this guy named Wesley de la Pa, I don't know, I don't know if that's how you say it, but la Pa. In article, another article wrote, following the advice of a family friend and acclaimed writer, this guy Jack London, to go forth and live so that she could capture the human spirit in her art. She undertook a series of odd jobs such as a telephone operator and a fruit cannery worker. Whatever that means. Are you just like packing? The fruits? Fruit into cans? Like, I don't know. But, she was slaying, slaying the day away. Telephone operator, she's really artistic, she's shoving fruit in cans. Oh, and she's married, and she's 16. So, a lot of things happening for Miss Girl. Yikes. circa 1907 to 1914, she worked in a bunch of different roles that are unrelated to fruit cannery and telephone operation. Um, more of what she was passionate about, which was the screenwriting and film of films. and it's obviously the times that gals weren't doing shit. We talk about this all the time. They like, weren't allowed to like leave the house. So this was cray cray, obviously in the summer of 1914, she was hired as a writing assistant for, uh, Lois Weber Productions, which was a film company that was operated by this like, batty female director, Lois Weber. At the time, she was like, an icon in the industry. We obviously weren't live at this time, so I have no fucking idea, like, what to compare her to. But she was that bitch. Everyone knew who she was. That's all you need to know. Got it. So she is learning everything from her, and she says that everything she knows about screenwriting and film and all that stuff is all from this woman. So, when Lois, This goes to work for Universal. Yes, Universal. She offered to bring Miss Girl with her. And she decided, no, I'm, I'm good. I'm not going to take you up on the offer. Because, sidebar, she was besties with this lady, Mary Pickford. And she was an icon in films at the time. So she's in like all of the OG films, the silent films. When it like really started popping off in the early 1900s, she's like in every single one.
Speaker 3Got it.
Speaker 2Cool. So she's in every film at the time and they were kind of like a team. So Miss Girl starts writing scripts specifically for her and then she would sell them and then Miss Mary would be in the movie. Make sense? People were obsessed with her movies, with Mary, all of the above. So they are like, Dream team. Cool. Got it. So she writes this movie, The Poor Little Rich Girl, which I honestly, like, and I'm, you know, I don't watch movies ever. When I looked it up, I was like, why does it look kind of familiar? I feel like it was like the, a very iconic movie of the time, which I keep saying about all these people, but like, it made it seem like it was so popular that it like put her on the map that like everyone knew about it and the, how it's referenced in articles is like, Oh, I should know what that is kind of thing. You
Speaker 10know what I mean? Yeah.
Speaker 2And so it was written by her and it was super successful. And this company called Famous Players Lasky, they signed her a contract that was worth 50, 000 a year. So she could be Mary's official scenarioist, which is an actual word. So they basically are paying her 50, 000 a year to create screen plays for Mary. Okay. Which in the early 1900s, 50, 000. Do you want a lot of shit? How much do you think?
Speaker 350, 000. Like 120, 000 a year?
Speaker 2Uh, over a million. Wait, what? Yeah, so she is getting, she is a woman in the early 1900s getting paid over a million dollars a year in today's money. Holy
Speaker 9shit.
Speaker 2That's how good she was. So it actually, if you want me to be specific, it's a million, 224, 796 a year.
Speaker 3Nuts.
Speaker 2Slay. Um, she was reported to be at the time, the highest paid script writer in the business. And this is 1917.
Speaker 3Good for her.
Speaker 2Even more baddie of her. She was married four times.
Speaker 3Love it. Keep them guessing. Keep them on their toes.
Speaker 2That's what I'm saying. The first one was our man's Wesley. That first guy I talked about, and then she married this guy, Robert Pike. He's irrelevant. And then in 1919. She wed this guy, Fred Thompson, who was the co star to Mary in The Love Light in 1920. So her bestie, Mary. They, I actually read that they went on double, honeymoons. Like they were besties. Okay. Living the dream. Yeah. so that was in 1919. So they lived in a mansion. She is living that life. You know, in Beverly Hills, they were living lavish. And it's early 1928 and her husband steps on a nail while working in a stable on their very large property. And he contracts. Tetanus! Yikes. And he dies on Christmas day in 1928. Oh my god.
Speaker 9A
Speaker 2wuff. What a way to go
Speaker 3out. Imagine
Speaker 2dying, like dying from tetanus. Like that's crazy. From a
Speaker 3rusty nail? No!
Speaker 2I'd probably step on a rusty nail in this room.
Speaker 3Hey.
Speaker 2I'm just, no offense. We find birds, rusty nails, all the tings, all After he dies, she marries this guy. She moved on real quick, actually. She married George Hill. I think he was a director or an actor. I forget. But that marriage ended in divorce in 1933. So quick short years. She does have two sons. One's adopted. One is birthed of, I forget which one. I think it's, I don't know. The husband that died. one of them is like a U. S. Navy captain, Batty, and the other one follows, like, in her film footsteps. So she does have some form of legacy. But yeah, she dies. She dies a lonely baddie. She does not have a husband when she goes. She published a memoir called off with their heads, a serial comic tale of Hollywood, which is just like, wow, that she published that in 1972 and she dies in 1973 of an fucking aneurysm. Like why do people die from aneurysms? That's so really
Speaker 3scary though. So
Speaker 2crazy. Yeah. So she dies of a, just an average Joe aneurysm and she dies a single baddie, but also. Cited as one of the most renowned female screenwriters in the 20th century and she wrote over 325 scripts that were all hits in the course of her entire career.
Speaker 3Damn.
Speaker 2In a time where women didn't leave their houses So she's a baddie.
Speaker 3Definitely a baddie.
Speaker 2Didn't know about her. I'll show you a picture of her. She's cute This is her and her little, look at her. She's so cute.
Speaker 3Her little bonnet. Yeah, she's wearing a bonnet And we're in one
Speaker 2of like the director's chairs Also, not for nothing, when you looked up her name, a man kept coming up, and I was like, No. No.
Speaker 3Disrespectful.
Speaker 2Get the fuck out of here. So yeah, that's that.
Speaker 3Very good.
Speaker 2My source for that one was in fact an episode called Women's History Month Most Famous Females from Refinery29.
Speaker 3So I have two for you. First up is Deborah Sampson, the first woman to ever take a bullet for the U. S. A. K. A. the O. G. Mulan. Of America.
Speaker 8That's crazy.
Speaker 3Mm hmm. So Debra Sampson is born December 17, 1760 in Plimpton, Mass. Ooh! She's one of seven children.
Speaker 5How do people do that?
Speaker 3And her parents are descendants of pilgrims. And they struggle financially. They are very, very, very poor. And her dad goes off on a voyage at sea and he just never comes back.
Speaker 8Could that be happening?
Speaker 3And they're like, he's dead. Sorry, it's not funny. But they're like, he's dead. And her poor mother, who didn't have any money before. Obviously doesn't have anything to take care of them now. So, this was common at the time. You put your kids in different homes so that they could be fed. And so, Debra is five years old when this happens, and she goes to live with family, uh, for the next five years. Quick sidebar. According to Wikipedia, he didn't die. Her dad. He was just fully all set with having a wife and seven children.
Speaker 2I mean. That's one way to do it. So,
Speaker 3Samson's family was told that her father died in a shipwreck, but evidence indicates that he actually abandoned the family, migrated to Lincoln County, Maine. He had a common law wife named Martha, with whom he had at least two other children with, and he came back to Plimpton in 1794 to attend a property transaction. Imagine being one of these seven children and being like, Daddy? Daddy? You don't come home for us, but you know we'll get you here is a property transaction. That will, that will bring him back.
Speaker 2Also, what's a common law wife?
Speaker 3Uh, well in Massachusetts, I don't know how long it is in Maine. If you are with someone for 10 years, you are technically common law married.
Speaker 2Oh, okay. Have you ever
Speaker 3seen Legally Blonde? Yeah. When she gets the dog. He has the dog, but they've been dating. Oh, right,
Speaker 2right, yes.
Speaker 3And they've been dating over 10 years. And Emmett's like, Elle. And Elle's like,
Speaker 2we're taking the dog. Yeah. Good.
Speaker 3That's why. Okay, so she's sent to live with family, like I said, when she's five. She stays there till she's ten, and then she's forced to become an indentured servant to the Thomas family. They are a wealthier family, big, big, tons of kids. They live on a farm and they live in Middleborough. So, she is to remain a servant until she becomes of age, which is 18, and in exchange for her being their servant, she gets a roof over her head, clothing, and food. So, she's out there, she has the Thomas kids share their homework with her so that she can learn. Because she can't go to school. That's how she learned to read and write. She's completely self taught with everything. And once she's 18, she earned a living. Uh, in the winter she was a weaver, and in the summer she taught summer school. And the families that hired her would also, you know, do room and board. Jeremiah Thomas, the dad of the households, taught her how to shoot guns, apparently, and do like all sorts of shit on the farm so she could, she was like a carpenter, and she had like woodworking skills. So she's not only super smart in this jack of all trades, but she's a fucking hustler. She's out here slaying the day away. Well, hold that thought calling because she's about to slay in a different way. In early 1782, the Revolutionary War is in full swing, and she's like, you know what? I want to serve my fucking country. Period.
Speaker 2Woke up today and said, sure.
Speaker 3I'm feeling super patriotic and it's time for me to shine. But women are not soldiers in this day and age. She doesn't care. She wraps her boobs in gauze. Straps those bitches down. She sews herself a uniform and she tries to enlist. She does get caught. She gets recognized right away. And they're like, no ma'am, no thank you. They don't punish her in any way. But her church withdrew its fellowship, meaning no one would talk to her or associate with her unless she begged for forgiveness. And she's like,
Speaker 2okay, penance
Speaker 3don't want to anyway. Don't worry about it. I'm on to the next. So she's not easily deterred because Debra Sampson ain't no bitch in May of the same year. So a couple months later, she tries again and she enlists in a different town in this time under the name of Robert Shurtleff. And she joins the light infantry company of the 4th Massachusetts Regiment and they were elite troops and they were picked because they were taller and stronger than like the average male because I guess she was like 5'7, 5'8, which is my height and the average height for that day and age, I think it was 5'5.
Speaker 2Jesus. When did we start? I
Speaker 3don't know. Listen, I don't know.
Speaker 2Someone's been eating their Wheaties over time.
Speaker 3So because she's tall, it made her seem like more of a man. So they put her in this, like, elite group. How does that make
Speaker 4you feel?
Speaker 3Because they've
Speaker 4Oh no,
Speaker 3I would be demolished now it is. I'm just kidding. But she's given this dangerous task of scouting neutral territory to assess the British. So she literally works for George Washington. General George Washington. And he's like, Hey, I'm thinking about contemplating maybe attacking this area. Go scout it out. She's
Speaker 2like, Okay, cool. You don't know I have a pussy.
Speaker 3You have no idea of the power of Puswa. And I will. I have been an FBI agent from the day that I was born. So in June of 1782, Samson and two sergeants. led about 30 infantrymen on an expedition that ended up with a big confrontation with the Tories. So just a quick refresher, a Tory is an American who sides with the British. Okay? Okay. So the other team, they get into a fight with the other team, essentially. Got
Speaker 5it.
Speaker 3She leads a raid of a home that results in the capture of 15 men, but she gets shot in the leg and she also gets a bad sword cut. Right to the forehead. And she begs her men not to take her to the hospital because she's trying not to tell everyone that she has ta tas. I
Speaker 8was going to say, she's trying to hide her titties. She's
Speaker 3trying to hide them titties and she can't for so long and they're like, we have to take you. And she's like, no, no, no, please don't. Please don't. One guy slinks her over his horse and just brings her to the hospital is like, Robert, we got to take you man. Also
Speaker 8like, what was these hospitals back in the day? Let me tell you. For real.
Speaker 3So a doctor treats her head wound and trigger warning here. really quick. It's kind of gruesome. She leaves the hospital before they can treat her leg and she uses a knife, cuts open her leg, digs out the bullet herself, and then uses her weaver and sewing skills to sew herself back up. She's like, I'm not getting found out, bitches. Her leg never fully heals after this. I
Speaker 2mean, I wonder why.
Speaker 3But no one finds out she's a woman after this incident. She's reassigned. She now reports this guy, General John Patterson, and she continues to serve. She serves for a year and a half with no one knowing anything. George Washington is ordered to send a bunch of soldiers to Philly. They're having some trouble with some rebels and the uprising and all that crap. So Deborah, aka Robert, gets sent with a big group to over to Philly.
Speaker 10Take your titties and go.
Speaker 3Take your titties and get your ass to Philly. They need you.
Speaker 2Deb. Deb.
Speaker 3Deb. Fine gritty. And get your ass to Philly. In Philly, she gets really sick and she falls unconscious. And the doctor, Dr. Biney, I think is how you say his name. I mean, he's long
Speaker 2gone. He's
Speaker 3long gone. Dr. Biney removes her clothes to treat her to figure out because he's like, I don't know what's wrong. She's unconscious. So he removes her clothes to figure out what's wrong. And what does he find, ladies and gentlemen, but the Poussois. He finds the tatas and he finds the Poussois. In this lovely man, he doesn't say anything. He ends up, he doesn't say anything about her gender to the hospital, to the military, nothing. He has them bring her to his own home and his wife, his daughters, and a nurse take care of her and nurse her back to health.
Speaker 2Oh, that's kind. Good people.
Speaker 3So that fall, a couple months go by, she's on the mend. We sign Do
Speaker 2we just not know what this illness is? Yeah, I think What's good with people back then? Just like falling under.
Speaker 3To Burke. You know what I mean? Like, I fucking know. Scurvy. Bring back Scurvy.
Speaker 8Just a little touch of the plague.
Speaker 3Just a rusty nail. So we sign the Treaty of Paris. It ends the Revolutionary War. Dr. Biney asked Deb for a favor. He's like, hey, can you do me a favor? I wrote this letter to your general. And can you like pass it on to him? And she's like, after all you've done for me, of course I will. So she leaves and she goes to deliver the letter, but she's delivering it as a woman. Like she's dressed as a woman and he opens it right there and he looks at her and he says, Robert. And he says, Are you Robert Shurtleff? And she comes clean. And in other cases, women who pretended to be men and served would be minimally reprimanded. God only knows how much worse that got. He gives her an honorary discharge. He gives her some note with like words of advice and enough money to travel home. And he's like, You, you did your part for this country and that's that on that. And so she's honorably discharged at West Point, New York by General Henry Knox. She returns to mass. She marries a man, has three kids. She lives in Sharon and it seems like her life after the war was very simple, simple, typical farmer's wife. In 1802, she began a year long lecture tour about her experiences. The first woman in America to do so, sometimes dressing in full military regalia.
Speaker 2She's a whole ass public speaker. Before public speakers were public speakers. Yes!
Speaker 3She also, the military tried to keep her pension from her.
Speaker 2No. But
Speaker 3she petitioned against it and Paul Revere actually wrote on her behalf to a U. S. Representative and said all these nice things about her. It was accepted and your girl got her pension that she deserved. Shout out Paulie! And she passed away at 66 of yellow fever. What was
Speaker 4yellow fever? This is why we have vaccinations, Colleen. This is why
Speaker 3we have survived as long as
Speaker 2we have. I don't know
Speaker 3if I'm vaccinated. Colleen, I don't have the strength for this.
Speaker 2Yellow fever is a virus. Oh my god, your eyes turn yellow. Bites of infected mosquitoes. That makes sense. Prevented by vaccines. Ah! Winding it up.
Speaker 3She is buried in Sharon, Mass. Right down the street from you. Right
Speaker 2down yonder.
Speaker 3Her husband petitioned Congress as well to pay as the spouse of a soldier. And although the couple was not married at the time of her service, in 1837, the committee concluded that the history of the revolution, quote, furnished no other similar example of female heroism, fidelity, and courage. And he was awarded the money. He passed away before he was able to see it, but the fact that they awarded it to him because of her bravery, It says a lot. And that is the story of Deborah Samson, aka the American Mulan. And I used Wikipedia. There is a very funny drunk history episode on this with Padget Brewster. Oh, you do be loving those. In an article from the National Woman's History Museum, which I will post.
Speaker 2I have a similar one that's giving Mulan as well, but it's not here. It's over, over the pond. Cool. Let's do it. Slay. Her name is Dorothy Lawrence. There's really nothing about her prior to like when she became relevant, like midlife. I think By midlife at this point, it's probably like early 20s for these people, but you know what I mean? Like, there's nothing like, she was, she was born and her, her dad was a carpenter. Like, there's none of that shit out there. I have no fucking idea. All I know is that her name is Dorothy Lawrence and she was born in the UK. And that's all I know. And the current time that the story is relevant is 1915. Great. And it's peak, peak world one. Yeah. World. I'm going to catch up. Peak world war one. No one is safe. No one is safe. Nope. No one is safe. It's, it's giving war. It's giving trenches. It's giving war in the trenches. It's getting warzone. War is like not cool, honestly. Colleen, I
Speaker 4simply don't have the strength for the Gen Z version of
Speaker 3war. I don't have it.
Speaker 2War is like just a buzzword to me.
Speaker 3Do you know what? War isn't cool, Colleen. You're right. That's correct.
Speaker 2There's so many different ones I can't keep up and we're in one right now. It's crazy. It's crazy. Um, anyways, but Miss Dorothy Lawrence, she wants to be a journalist. That's all she wants to do. It's her passion. So she has some articles published here, there, and like the times and a bunch of other random ass newspaper places. Okay. And the war has started. So she writes to a number of different newspapers offering her services as a war correspondent because it was her passion. And she was like, what? Like that's giving, that's the most current times you could possibly be in to write about. Like it is. We're getting, we're getting after it, and they're like, yeah, no, not allowed, sorry. They're a woman. Yeah. And she thought this would be the best way to gain recognition for all of her talents, because right now she's just like writing about fucking cats and trees and stuff, like nothing exciting. Mm hmm. And, but no paper obviously would send a woman to the front lines, but also, they wouldn't even, like, experienced male correspondents weren't allowed either. Like, that's how cray cray it was.
Speaker 6Got it.
Speaker 2Again, no one was safe. so she travels, she's like, okay, bye, whatever. She travels to France in 1915 and she tries to join the voluntary aid detachment, but it was also rejected there for having a Poussoir. And she attempts to enter the war zone via the French sector as a freelancer. I
Speaker 3mean, listen, she wants what she wants. She's like, no, I'm going to try here
Speaker 2too. No, she will not give up. She's just throwing shit at a wall and just seeing what sticks. but she gets arrested by the French police. Um, I think she's only about two miles at the time of the front line, but like, she still gets caught. So she's like making her way. She's like, I'm going to the front line. And she's like, they're like, get the fuck out of here. We're not fucking around. It is We're in the trenches. Get out. This isn't the time. We don't have the time for you right now. But it is
Speaker 3the time. That's the thing.
Speaker 2I know. Um, so she spends the night sleeping on a haystack in a forest. As one does. Just minding her business. And then she's like, uh, I'll just return to Paris, whatever. And when she gets back to Paris, she tells herself, you know what? The only way that I can see myself proceeding is if I disguise myself as a man. She said, I'll see what an ordinary English girl without credentials or money can accomplish.
Speaker 3Listen, cross dress your heart out if it gets you the job you want.
Speaker 2I'm just an ordinary girl.
Speaker 3That's my unpopular opinion. Go full fucking drag on their asses. I mean. Whip out the mustache.
Speaker 2I'm halfway there.
Speaker 3Glue that bitch on. Shave your head. Do what you gotta do.
Speaker 2Oh, don't do that.
Speaker 3Well, if you're going to go for it. Yeah, I
Speaker 2guess right. But I
Speaker 3guess in that day, maybe shaving your head, you didn't have to do it.
Speaker 2Bob, Bob has a shaved head. Bob the drag queen.
Speaker 3No, I don't mean shave it bald. I just mean like cut it.
Speaker 2Give her a little trim.
Speaker 3Yeah. I just meant like a trim. Bob the drag queen is bald. Yeah. Same thing as Trixie. It's easier for them to put their legs on.
Speaker 2Oh yeah. That's true. More room for playing.
Speaker 3They usually take their eyebrows off too, because those are hard to mat down.
Speaker 2That's true. Drama on. So yeah, a mission and she persuades two British army soldiers that she met in Paris. And also along her whole story, she always has people helping her. So it's like she must have had some redeeming qualities. Yeah, she
Speaker 3must be charming in some way.
Speaker 2Yeah. So she meets a It's these two guys at a Paris cafe and she convinces them to smuggle her a whole ass khaki uniform piece by piece within their washing. So like instead of just being like, here you go, they like tried to hide it and like with every like piece of their laundry, they would like throw one in. So all the way until she gets a full ass uniform. So she's acquired one, she's good. And she starts practicing transforming herself into A male soldier. She flattens down her titties with a corset and she uses sacking and cotton wool to bulk out her shoulders. Imagine how hot that would be.
Speaker 3So warm. So warm.
Speaker 2And she persuades two, two different Scottish military policemen to cut her hair.
Speaker 3Okay, so she did. Short military style.
Speaker 2She's like, you know military style? Fuck me now. So that's
Speaker 3what I meant, Collin. What? When we got the trim. Oh,
Speaker 2like boy hair? Yeah. Like very She's the Man.
Speaker 3Yes.
Speaker 2Sebastian Hastings. I'm a cool dude. My favorite's Gouda. Someone, a guy said something to me about cheese. And I was like, have you ever seen She's the Man? And the person was like, no. And I was like, my
Speaker 9favorite's
Speaker 2Gouda! And I kept saying it and it didn't correlate. And that's why I don't have a boyfriend, so.
Speaker 4I'm a badass hunk of dude.
Speaker 2Um, so she's, she's packing and she has a nice Sebastian Hastings hairstyle. Love it. Um, she darkens her complexion with this stuff called Kool Aid. Condi's fluid, which is a disinfectant, which like simply can't be safe. We're out here with yellow fever, the plague. I know
Speaker 3that's the least of their fucking worries.
Speaker 2Tuberculosis, whatever.
Speaker 3Tubercula. Oh Lord. And
Speaker 2scurvy. and she also, which I hate, she scraped the pale skin of her cheeks. So that way she'd have like a shaved rash. Like how, and that's, but yeah. And she added a fake tan using a shoe polish, which like, oh, Your poor pores. Your poor
Speaker 3She must have immaculate skin. Because if I did that, the way in which no one would ever be able to look at me again.
Speaker 2Should we bring that back as Tanner? No.
Speaker 3Nope, Colleen, no, nope, you get your shit at Walmart and you need to stay in the Walmart store.
Speaker 2I guess. You know what? They've been locking that shit up lately. I don't love that. I don't love having to ask for help. Can you please unlock this? Come on. It doesn't really make I get razors, but what, are people huffing it? People must be down bad.
Speaker 3That's, I
Speaker 4mean, are people legit huffing?
Speaker 2People are like, that's not feral
Speaker 4for the fucking tanner.
Speaker 2Like, where are we at? Someone there, like, pressing the button, please press for help. Inside of Walmart? Like, I'm humbled.
Speaker 3Immediately humbled.
Speaker 2Whatever, but it's fine, I'm tan, so it's all that matters. So she's out here using shoe polish on her, her face. Damn. As a exfoliant, um, and I've literally wrote, it's giving Mulan. She wears a blanket coat with no underwear, so that way no one would discover her abandoned petticoats and undergarments. Hope
Speaker 3no gust of wind comes, girlfriend. I don't want anyone
Speaker 2to see, they'll know, that I have a Poussoir hiding under here in my undercarriage. She gets a whole ass fake identity as, now she is Private Dennis Smith of the 1st Battalion Regiment. I don't know what that means. And she's, she's headed for the front lines. Just easy as that. I get by with a little help from my friends. A lot of male friends. You know what I mean? Something tells me she's up to something. You think she was sucking dick? Maybe, who knows? Packing beans? How are all these random men being like, yeah I'll cut your hair and give you a uniform, the fuck? No one's that nice. I don't know, maybe she's No one is that nice to women during these times. Let's get real. Let's think high level.
Speaker 3Don't make her out to be something that you don't have proof on. No, that's true, but I would, I would appreciate it if she did that. I would love that. I'd be like, you're a bad
Speaker 8bitch for that. That's not a hit down, that's a hit up, if anything.
Speaker 4Why does it always come back to this topic? Why do you always have to bring up something like, she had to have get it by sucking a dick? Like, that's the only way forward.
Speaker 12It's the key to anything. Is to wank.
Speaker 4Like, everything is just
Speaker 12To wank or not to wank?
Speaker 4That is the question.
Speaker 12That is the age old question.
Speaker 4The answer is no.
Speaker 12She's just a good person. And
Speaker 4she literally might just be like charming and kind. And you're
Speaker 12like,
Speaker 4she's blowing everyone in sight.
Speaker 2The Scottish, the British, everyone in the military. She's like
Speaker 4You need to be studied. You need to submit your body to science after you need
Speaker 2a lobotomy. Like, I'm being dead serious. Shutter Island style. I think a lobotomy would do me justice. Picture me after a little zap. I would be in tip top shape. It's not a zap. They're awful, Colleen. I would be in top tier shape.
Speaker 3I think you think that will solve all your problems, and I think you should just go get Adderall. Can't. I'm too old. But there, there has to be a medication. I'm sorry.
Speaker 2Will you call my doctor for me? No,
Speaker 3fuck off.
Speaker 2Come on. We can just message her. We have an app. Her girlie's like that. Then you do it. Okay, fine. I'll think about it. Anyways, back to the story. She is headed for the front lines because she is that bitch. And on her way, she meets another guy. Funny. So she meets this guy on her way. His name is Tom Dunn, who offered to assist her with getting where she needs to be, like, on the front line, whatever. But he was like, I'm a little nervous that you're like a lone lady with around, like, a bunch of starved soldiers. Also, it's like super legal and I just like don't see this going well for you. And so he finds her an abandoned cottage to sleep in all by herself. So during her time when she was on the front line, she would return there every single night and she had like a damp mattress to sleep on and then he would just like feed her food. For a while. Cause he felt bad for her and was like, look at you slaying. I don't want to get in trouble though. And also like the men aren't well. So just like stay here in this little cottage on this rotting mattress. So
Speaker 4you don't have to sock my
Speaker 2dick. Maybe that's what rationed for dick. I don't know. You don't know. You got to read between the lines. And I think I am.
Speaker 3Or he was just like, hey, I want you to not be messed with and here's a nice place to lay your head.
Speaker 2Yeah, I guess. I guess. That sounds boring though. So that sounds all great, but she was actually quite literally in the trenches, in the trench of the front lines, which like front lines is like such a Like, I truly picture, like, Twilight when they're running towards Colleen.
Speaker 3Colleen. You cannot take war, the front lines of war, where people are actually dying, and compare it to the fourth fucking Twilight series. But
Speaker 2like the running, you know, like, and everyone's like, heads are flying. Like, that's what I picture. And like, that's the front line in my brain, right?
Speaker 3Carlisle said, which is all fake because she sees it in a premonition before it fucking happens. Right. So it's not real. Right.
Speaker 8Because her baby, that one's upgrowing, imprinting
Speaker 3on a werewolf. That's a fully whole ass grown man. Duh. He shines in the sun. Duh. Not sure why you have questions.
Speaker 2What don't you get about that? I'm just not understanding. We've
Speaker 3talked about this
Speaker 4right where I do this to Liam and I'm like I don't get what you are missing. He left, and now the Italian vampires want to kill him. A. K. A. Dakota Fanning. And she jumps off of a cliff, and he thinks she's dead, so they fly to Italy to save his
Speaker 3life. Like, it's so straightforward. So he has to reveal his shiny skin. Cause he wants to die. But she saves him by running through a fountain and trying to tackle him. But they have a bebe. Yeah. I mean, it's very simple. I don't know why I have to keep explaining it to you. He can't
Speaker 2stop laughing.
Speaker 3Werewolves smell bad to vampires and vampires smell bad to werewolves, it's so clear. We've all, we all know this. God, I just have to keep saying it, like it's our common knowledge.
Speaker 8Can't breathe.
Speaker 2My God. So, again, she's in the trenches, right? She becomes a sapper in the war. A sapper. She's not out here, she's not getting maple syrup out of trees. She's like, quite literally building the trees. Like, she's digging the holes. I mean, that's amazing. And then she's in them. Yeah. She's in the 179th Tunneling Company, 51st Division of Royal Engineers. So she's a specialist mine laying company. Okay? Like that's what she's, she's in there. Yeah. Digging tunnels and shit. But it's a very stressful situation. So due to that, she develops constant chills and rheumatism, which I don't know what that is. And then she just keeps fainting. Like just left and right. She's having fainting fits. She's not doing well. And after 10 days of service. In the trenches to protect the men who helped her so they are not revealed. She decides to say, Hey, it's me. I have a pussy and tits and I'm lying to you. And she does that. And the sergeants are all like,
Speaker 6and
Speaker 2they arrest her instead of being like, Hey, thanks for your help. Miss Sapper. Why
Speaker 3would she come clean?
Speaker 2Because she, she knew it wasn't going to end up well. She was not well. She couldn't even get back to the cabin at night.
Speaker 3Oh, okay. So she's like, they're going to find out eventually. And they're also going to be like,
Speaker 2you obviously knew who knew. And then it would become a whole like, right. To save them. Got it. Got it. Got it. Yeah. Um, so she returns to England and they declare her a prisoner of war. Oh, so aggressive. Yeah. They're so dramatic. And so she's like, okay, I'll just forget about this. So she moves. I'll just put this JK, LOL. I'll just put the trenches behind me. And. She writes a book, she moves again, new identity, and she writes a book called Sapper. A sapper, Dorothy Lawrence, the only English woman soldier. And although it was very well received in England and also in America and a little bit in Australia, it was so censored by the War Office, they were like, absolutely fucking not, we are not publishing that shit, you're crazy. Then by, this is in 1919, so by 1925 her erratic behavior was brought to the attention of the authorities and she confides in a doctor that she had been raped as a teenager, which is really shitty, by her church guardian, which is fucked up. Um, she had no other family to really look after so she was taken into care and deemed insane, insane, sorry, um, and she was committed to a mental hospital in March of 1925 and she did not have any visitors. And she died of cerebral thrombosis. But she lived to 76, which is good. Um Was she in a mental
Speaker 3hospital for the rest of her life? Yes.
Speaker 2Colleen, you
Speaker 3specifically told me you had no bumper ones.
Speaker 2No, there's a good ending, I guess, after she dies. In 2003, her story was rediscovered. Her book was reprinted in the Imperial War Museum, included her experiences in an exhibition on women at war. And since 2015, several plays and films have been produced based off of her story. And I read that the only reason that it was brought back up is because the grandson, the great great great grandson of the person that helped her, Dunn, found the book. Her autobiography that she had written that was like anti they were not loving that in his stuff when he died. So he read it and was like, Oh my God, what is this? And then this is incredible. Yeah. And he was the one that like led the rediscovery of her story.
Speaker 3Well, I'm glad that she rewrote history a little bit and finally got her due.
Speaker 2Yeah. Her, the latter part of her life was not great, but at least she has a legacy now.
Speaker 3She does have a good legacy. In early 2000
Speaker 2she started slaying the day away again. Yeah. Yeah, but fuck them.
Speaker 3But fuck them. Fuck them
Speaker 5all. Fuck em. Fuck em all. Fuck em all. Fuck em all. Same website as before, so, it's a lie.
Speaker 3Okay, I have another baddie for us next. Her name is Florence Nightingale. Have you ever heard of her?
Speaker 2Yes. Is that not the
Speaker 3most beautiful name you've ever heard? Why do I know that name? Florence Nightingale. She's the mother of modern nursing.
Speaker 2Oh, okay. Okay, Miss Girl.
Speaker 3So Florence, who is actually named after the city she was born in, Florence, Italy, was born into a very wealthy and very well connected British family. They have multiple estates in England that make any home look like a shack. They're very wealthy. Her sister, I forget her sister's name, is a city in Greece. Because she was also born there. So they just like travel all over.
Speaker 2Oh. Stay at
Speaker 3multiple estates.
Speaker 2It's giving four Christmases when they're all named after the ones they were conceived in.
Speaker 3Yeah. Except if four Christmases was British millionaires,
Speaker 2it's not
Speaker 3like Orlando, Dallas, Denver. So a BBC documentary reported that, quote, Florence and her older sister, they had a benefited from their father's advanced ideas about women's education. They studied history, mathematics, Italian, classic literature, and philosophy. And from an early age, Florence, who was the more academic of the two girls, displayed an extraordinary ability for collecting and analyzing data, which she would use to great effect in later life. End quote.
Speaker 2Okay, Ms. Flo. Very
Speaker 3smart. Florence's mother loved being a social climber. She loved hosting a party. She thought that's what women do. They do. have estates, they pop out a bunch of babies, and they host the social elite, period, right? And at the time the expectations for Florence was exactly that. Marry well, have kids, host parties. Florence actually didn't like the party. She was a little socially awkward. She didn't like being in the spotlight. She wanted nothing to do with parties, but she was very headstrong and stubborn. And at the age of 16 she tells her family she wants to be a nurse. It's her calling in life, and she was made for something more than popping out babies. She's like, this isn't for me. At the time, nursing is not a respected job. It's considered beneath them. It's considered like daily labor for them. They're like, ew, why would you do something so blue collar? What's happening? It's below their social standing. But she doesn't care. She turns down a marriage proposal from a very suitable man when she's 17. And in 1844, she She goes to Germany and she studies at a hospital there. She's like, bye. She does that for a few years and when she comes back to London to work at a hospital for ailing governesses, which like,
Speaker 2like princesses, I'm
Speaker 3assuming just high ranking
Speaker 2royale. Yeah.
Speaker 3So she becomes an advocate for nurses and public health and within a year. at this hospital, they promote her to superintendent of the entire hospital. Because she's just a fucking bad bitch. She is a get shit done. I want to point out that hospitals in this time are fucking grotesque. I was just gonna say. Not a single person is washing their hands or the instruments they're using. Nothing is sanitized. No, no, you just wait. During the Crimean War, which is a war in Europe that you have never learned about and you will not learn about and that's okay Because I can't do a breakdown of Constantinople right now Have you ever heard that word before? Constantinople. Constantinople. Greece? Istanbul, even all New York. Turkey! Close to Greece. Maybe that's what I'm thinking. Neighbors? Great. News came around about a ton of wounded soldiers being in Turkey and Conditions are very very bad and they need help and the Secretary of War Writes a letter directly to Florence and is like hey girl need you and your team to hop on a boat and sail here So that's what they do In October of 1854, Florence and 30 plus nurses and some nuns. Gotta get the nuns on them. You gotta have them. You gotta bring their habits. They have to pray over someone. You gotta have the nuns. You ever heard of last rites? They get on a boat. They sail to this military hospital and they're like, how can we help? When they get there is a shit show. Literally. What do you mean? They're shitting on each other? The hospital was in a large cesspool. On top of, and all of the water was contaminated, and everyone is sitting in their own excrement. Medicine is in short supply. The ventilation system is broken. There are flies and insects everywhere.
Speaker 2Wait, so they're just like sitting in a pile of shit? Yes. What does that mean? Like, just get up and move? They
Speaker 3have no, no, there are thousands and thousands and thousands of soldiers. They don't have the supplies, they don't have Just all
Speaker 2shitting themselves?
Speaker 3There's no bathrooms, like there's nowhere to go, Colleen. They don't even have clean linen or fresh bandages, like they have nothing. Mass infection was so common, at that point soldiers were dying more from infection than their war wounds. Oh, great. So our girl is like, That's dysentery. That is dysentery way to happen, which people died of. I'm dead serious. I looked up why people were dying in this hospital. One of them is dysentery. So our girl gets right to work. She's like, fuck this noise. She writes to the times and begs for the government to help out with the poor facilities in the conditions. She gets the nickname. The nickname, she gets the nickname, the lady with the lamp and the angel of Crimea. And this is because she would walk around from soldier to soldier with a lamp above her head. And they saw it as like their angel coming to visit them because she worked tirelessly every day, every night, every waking moment, she was checking in on these soldiers. And they were like, wow, this woman is like actually taking care of us. And we've never been cared for. One man said this. Quote, she is a ministering angel without any exaggeration in these hospitals and as her slender form glides quietly along each quarter, every poor fellow's face softens with gratitude at the sight of her. When all the medical officers have retired for the night and silence and darkness have settled down upon those miles of prostates sick, she may be observed alone with a little lamp in her hand making her solitary rounds. End quote. Wholesome. So, she was actually originally nicknamed the Lady with the Hammer because troops watched her hammer and break into a storage unit. to access more medicine. She's like, break that bitch open. And so she was actually the lady of the hammer. But the guy that I just quoted William Russell felt that that was unladylike. And so he used the alternative, the lady with the lamp, which is how that came about. The hospital does get the help because of Florence, and they do improve their conditions. Dictionary of National Biography says that. She reduced the death rate from 42 percent to 2%. Oh shit.
Speaker 10That's crazy.
Speaker 3She made improvements to hygiene. She called the Sanitary Commission. She implemented washing your hands.
Speaker 2Sorry, they have a commission? Yep, apparently. This is what we're living in? Apparently. Okay, cool. She
Speaker 3established a laundry system so that patients could actually get more clean linens regularly. She protected the food. Like, if anyone had a dietary restriction, she, like, went into the kitchen and made sure no one else touched it to make sure everyone was eating properly. She created a classroom so patients who were there for a long time could. Learn and also partly for entertainment because there was nothing fucking else to do. She was on it anyway to make this place better. She did it. She was there for a year and a half.
Speaker 8That's it. In my head. This is like a decade worth of work.
Speaker 3No, she did. Oh, I was like, is that not enough for you? Did you see my face? I was like, I
Speaker 2was like, is that rude to say? No, no. She did
Speaker 3all of this in a year and a half. I'm
Speaker 2saying it sounds like 10 years of work.
Speaker 3Yes. So. The war finally comes to an end. She writes an 800 plus page paper based on her observation and sends it to the government. And it's like, you are welcome. You are welcome. Imagine writing 800 pages about anything. No. Mmm. You're wicked. My first thought was maybe my love of musical theater. Oh god, I'm such a nerd. Okay, when she returns to England, She receives a hero's welcome, and she doesn't like it. She does not like being the center of attention. She's like, what is this? She receives a medal from Queen Victoria, an engraved brooch that has come to known as the Nightingale Jewel. Ooh! And she is given 250, 000 by the British government. Which is? A shit ton of money. So
Speaker 2much money. A
Speaker 3shit ton of money. So with the support of Queen Victoria, her and Queen Victoria become buddies. Oh, Nightingale helps create a royal commission into the health of the Army. It employed leading statisticians of the day to analyze army mortality data and what they found was horrifying. 16, 000 of the 18, 000 deaths were from preventable disease, not battle.
Speaker 6Yikes.
Speaker 3So because her ability to translate data into a new visual format, it's now called the Nightingale Rose Diagram, and it basically showed how the sanitary commission's work decreased the, the death rate. But she made it applicable because she created this beautiful diagram to show people so that they could understand. It inspired all sorts of standards for sanitation for the army, but beyond, like in the government. And she became the first female member of the Royal. Statistical Society and was named an honorary member of the American Statistical Association as well.
Speaker 10Damn.
Speaker 3Like, she is a bad bitch. She establishes the Nightingale Fund. She gets a fuck ton of donations. She uses it to open a hospital called the St. Thomas Hospital. Within it is the very first nursing school called the Nightingale Training School for Nurses. She inspires an entire generation of women to become nurses because they're like, look at how much of a badass this woman is and now we can get proper training. And because of all that she's done in her heroism in the reception that it got, this is no longer a job to look down upon, but this is a noble occupation. Like if you have this job, people are like, damn, look at you go saving people's lives. Like it is now. She writes a book called Quote Notes on Nursing. It's sold to the public and it helps people all over the world. They still use it in schools and hospitals today. And I think what's really cool too is she would have people come over and personally train them in a hospital and then they would go back to their motherland and then spread all of the knowledge that they have. She has probably saved billions of people just with her basic knowledge and being able to make it accessible to everybody. It's just incredible. She's incredible. The ripple effect is insane. She does get sick, and she gets bedridden. She got sick in Crimea, and it follows her home, and she's bedridden for many, many, many years. She uses this time. Oh, yeah. She uses this time to study, create more of her graphs in her diagrams, and she never stops. She hosts politicians. She hosts people from different countries. She's like, she hosted them from her bed. She would like point to the diagram she made and be like, this is what we're doing here. This is what we're doing here. That's
Speaker 10crazy.
Speaker 3In 1907, when she was 88 years old, she received the Order of Merit, which is one of the highest honors you can receive. And she received it from Queen Victoria, who's still queen. Oh, that's nice. So it was like, Hey, old bestie. Remember me? We back. She died peacefully in her sleep at 90 years old.
Speaker 298?
Speaker 390.
Speaker 2Oh, either way, 90s. 90s still for that time. Yeah.
Speaker 3But the reason why nursing is the respected profession now is because in part of all the work that Florence Nightingale did for the soldiers during the war. And that's how she did it. And she affected change for the rest of time. And that's Florence Nightingale, the mother of modern nursing.
Speaker 2Okay, Ms. Flo.
Speaker 3Yeah, crushing it. And my sources for that. Also a Drunk History episode. Also, it's Paget Brewster again. Minka Kelly plays Florence Nightingale. I think I forgot how beautiful Minka Kelly is. She
Speaker 2is stunning. It's
Speaker 3like actually insane how pretty of a person she is. Yes. I was like, how? What are your cheekbones doing there? I used a History. com article and I used Wikipedia, of course, which we will post.
Speaker 2For my last Little Bebe, I have Miss Girl, Sybil Luddington. She is, basically, the female.
Speaker 3Last but certainly not least.
Speaker 2But she does it better, don't worry. there's not much similar to Dorothy. There's not much on Miss Sibyl because We obviously get everything from like a third, second source of like some crusty old manuscript written by a man who hates women and it's on a feather quill and it's like in a different, it's basically like a dead language however they were speaking back in the day. So yeah, that's where we all have our information from. So there's really not much going on like the background of her other than like word of mouth and also even like the spelling of her name is different in every story and even on her gravestone it's different. So it's just whatever, not the point. She was just your average 16 year old gal living life in New York, but it was during the revolutionary war time. So like add that in the mix, not really a sleigh time to be living there or to be alive, but you know, she's just living, trying to live her 16 year old life. She somehow comes across the information that the British were planning to attack her nearby town of Danbury, Connecticut. And that is where They were hiding a lot of their like shit for the army on their side. So like a lot of their like weapons or whatever it is that they used cannons. I don't fucking know, but it was like a hub spot for them. I don't know. So she somehow acquires this information and she's like, Oh my God, daddy. Her dad was a Colonel in the militia and he had over like 400 men underneath him. She's like, Oh, I should probably let him know. Let a guy know.
Speaker 3Yeah,
Speaker 2I mean,
Speaker 3that's
Speaker 2fair. That they're coming for our necks. Gonna burn us down. Gotta let dad know. She's
Speaker 3holding out peace signs while she says that for anyone who's curious.
Speaker 2So she's like, fuck, I can't call him. I can't like smoke signal him. I can't write him a letter. So she grabs her horse named Star and she's like prodding him with a stick and she's like, off we go. So from New York On April 26th, 1777, during a rainstorm, she travels 40 miles bareback on her horse on the way to Goddamn. Overnight, on the way to find her dad, and she lets him know and is like, Hey, heads up, they're coming in hot, blah blah blah, and, uh, Although the British were successful in their raid on Danbury, because of the fact that she got to them first, they were still able to encounter them in Ridgefield, Connecticut instead, which would become this whole like Battle of Ridgefield situation. So like that is the reason why I was in Ridgefield, it's literally because of her. And it was successful. They got to drive them back to Long Island Sound and they didn't really like fuck it up too much. But yeah, she was basically died off in history until 1961 when the daughters of the American revolution commissioned a sculpture in her honor in bronze, and it's in Carmel, New York still to this day. And that's really all she got. Whereas Paul Revere got a whole fucking poem and like a lifetime worth of notoriety and she gets a little, a little. Oh, you know what else she got? She got a stamp. A stamp! She did, yeah. In 1975, she was honored with a Bicentennial stamp.
Speaker 3Trust us for Sybil.
Speaker 2Yeah, but she is the reason that, um, they didn't burn down Danbury. And she got to them first.
Speaker 3I wonder if there's anything in Danbury that's named after her. I don't know. There should be.
Speaker 2There should be. There should be a statue. There is. I think, um, Carmel is like closer to her hometown. I think that's why. Because she rode a lot of miles. She rode a lot of miles. 40 miles bareback
Speaker 3overnight. In a rainstorm. In a rainstorm. In the 1700s. With a stick. Imagine if she woke up and she was like, what do you mean there's texting? Like I didn't have to do any
Speaker 2of that. Are you shitting me? It could have, this could have been an email.
Speaker 3This easily could have been an email.
Speaker 2With an eye, with a high importance. Yeah.
Speaker 3Easily
Speaker 2could have been.
Speaker 3Hey, you up? Guess what?
Speaker 5They coming. They coming. The redcoats are coming.
Speaker 2Daddy! Gotta let him know.
Speaker 3Okay, so we don't have a game. But I started to make a list of the TikToks that made me cry to use as positive stories. And then I was like, wouldn't it be funny if I just list off what made me happy cry from TikTok? Are you ready to roll your eyes at me?
Speaker 2I guess. I mean, they already were rolled.
Speaker 3A woman gets a hearing implant. Okay. She's in the office. She's hearing for the first time. She's crying, right? She turns to her mother. Her mother immediately says, I love you. So I'm already a wreck. Okay. The boyfriend is in there too. And she turns to him and he's like, I wanted the first thing for you to hear is my proposal to you and gets down on one knee and proposes right there as she weeps because she can finally hear him.
Speaker 2I was a mess. That sounds like a lot for one day.
Speaker 3Imagine. Yeah.
Speaker 2That's crazy. Yes. I mean, you don't even need to hear it to get a boyfriend. Heart overload. That's a lot. That's a lot. That's like in
Speaker 3a book. Yes. A hundred percent. At a hockey game. These two parents come out, their son is stationed in Afghanistan. He's been there for well over a year. Come on, man. They come out to do the puck drop at the hockey game, right? You go up and it's the two players, right? They shake the hands of the two players and then they turn around and they realize that neither of them have the puck and the announcer brings out the son in his full military uniform and he's holding the puck in the dad runs in, tackles him onto the ice in the mother sobs while they do a big group hug. And everyone is going absolutely apeshit and giving him a standing ovation. I'm upset. There was another one of those where the husband came out because his wife was stationed and they had her In the goalie full uniform and she was in the net and when he turned around, she took the helmet off and they ran into the middle and cried and I cried. We all cried. watching a little girl, I think it was in Portugal, get the hat at a Taylor Swift concert because you know how she's singing, I don't know about you, but I'm feeling 22 and she's walking up that massive stage. Yeah, this little girl is having. a meltdown. Like there's
Speaker 2simply
Speaker 3no other way. She's probably six and you can see Taylor getting close to her and she's full body shaking. She's screaming every word. She absolutely sobs. Taylor hugs her. It is so nice and it is so sweet and it made me cry. Remember that forever a little kid saying at his graduation that when he wants to grow up. So have you seen this trend? There's this new trend that at kindergarten graduation, they say this little kid wants to grow up and be whatever. Some of them have been wicked, fucking funny. Like one little girl went up there and she spoke for herself and she was like, I want to be pregnant. I think she meant to say like, I want to be a mom. She said, I want to be pregnant. Everyone started dying laughing. One kid said, work at McDonald's, like dream big kids. I love this. I love this. But one kid gets up his whole family there and his grandfather. And he says that when he grows up, he wants to be a firefighter because his grandpa, Jesus Christ, his grandpa was a firefighter and he's the best grandpa ever. And the grandpa is just trying not to cry. Cause he's like a big manly man and is weeping as his wife holds his hand. Kill me. A woman loses her dad and she has a boyfriend and they're watching TV one night and they're sitting in the living room and he puts on a video and it's the video of him asking the dad's permission before he died. And when she turns around, he's on one knee and he's like, I got his permission cause I know it was important to you. And she starts sobbing and says, yes, like I'm, I am not kidding you little kids, old people, heart felt proposals. Not every proposal is heartfelt, heartfelt proposals in military homecomings. Turn me into a puddle. And those are just some of the tech talks that have made me cry in the last couple of days.
Speaker 2Well, that's upsetting.
Speaker 3Is it upsetting? So it's so funny cause me and Paula have this debate all the time because she loves scary movies and I love happy crying. And to her, very similar to you, to her, she's like, crying is crying. It's like a bad thing. Like I don't want to cry. But to me, when I'm so happy I'm crying, it's because like, I feel so much joy.
Speaker 2No.
Speaker 3What does that mean to you?
Speaker 2I don't cry when I'm not happy. So when you watch a video of an old person? I'm sad. I'm so sad. Why? Because they're so old and they were just such, like, they were, they were not that before. Like, when I see a video of But you don't
Speaker 3mind being scared? Like, that's where you lose like, when you watch a scary movie, cause you love scary movies and so does Paula. I think I think about what
Speaker 2they were before. Like before, like when they were younger and now they're just like old and wise and like, but why not feel
Speaker 3I don't I don't know That's weird. That's wild to me. Like when I'm watching I'm like, oh my god. I'm so happy that my heart could burst I'm not crying sad. I'm not like, oh my god poor them I don't know. You're just like, this bums me out because I'm picturing them as young people?
Speaker 2I don't know. It depends on the context of the video, of the old people.
Speaker 3But why, like, scary stuff? Like, being scared is way more frightening to me than crying. I don't know. Like, people who pay to go to the movies to be scared, to go see a scary movie, are crazy to me. Read the news. Is that not scary enough? Like, are we, do we not live in a day and age where the news I hate
Speaker 2going to get my nails done and the news is on. Can we not? Yeah,
Speaker 3it's, yeah.
Speaker 2Put on Friends or something.
Speaker 3Put on Something else.
Speaker 2I don't want to see that house burn to the ground and all the people and it's belongings are gone. Yeah,
Speaker 3I also, I love like a family feud moment when it's on at the nail salon. Like I love a game show where you can pay attention, but not really, but still be kind of invested. Yeah. And still get a giggle from time to time, a talk show, but no, no news. But you know what I mean? Like, I just don't think when I cry like that, I just don't think that way.
Speaker 2Yeah, I need to further assess that.
Speaker 3Oh, okay.
Speaker 2Because like I definitely weep when I read books, but it's not like I'm weeping because I'm so happy for them at the end. It's like, really? Yeah, I'm so upset because I don't think that is real. Like maybe I don't think it's real and like I just want that to be real. I don't know. I don't know what it is. It's like a hollow feeling. It's not like I'm so happy for them, so I'm crying. It's like, ugh, that just like upsets me.
Speaker 3Okay. I don't know how to explain it. I think I need to assess it. But why, what's with the spooky stuff?
Speaker 2I just love spooky stuff. I like the feeling it gives me. Like it's like invigorating.
Speaker 3Oh. Bray needs to be studied.
Speaker 2Couldn't be more excited for the new Beetlejuice movie also.
Speaker 3Yeah.
Speaker 2I'm very excited for that. Very excited. I
Speaker 3love when they bring back the entire cast. If you, if any, even one of them drops out, specifically Catherine O'Hara, because let's be serious and also Beetlejuice. But if any one of them drops out, it's not as good, but all of them are back.
Speaker 2It's going to give them warm and fuzzies when you see them.
Speaker 3Yeah.
Speaker 2Yeah.
Speaker 3All right, everybody. Well, those are our baddies of the week.
Speaker 2Bad bitches only.
Speaker 3Our bad bitches from Herstory.
Speaker 2Bad bitches. Power to the Poussoir.
Speaker 5Power to the Poussoir. What? Just go
Speaker 3country immediately. Power to the Poussoir. All right, everyone. We hope you have a wonderful week.
Speaker 8You just sounded like a flight attendant when you said that. Did I? Yes, that was crazy. All right,
Speaker 3everybody, attention. It's like,
Speaker 8smile, smile.
Speaker 3Yeah, when they put the buckle, and they like, show you how to tighten the buckle and unclip it.
Speaker 2And they're like, also, we're headed straight for the ocean. Okay, thank you. Goodbye. Did I get phone
Speaker 3voice on you?
Speaker 2Yep.
Speaker 3Hearing your phone voice is wild.
Speaker 2Mine?
Speaker 3Yeah, you picked up a work call once and you were like, oh my god, that's crazy. It's totally fine. It's no problem at all. And I was like, who the fuck that be?
Speaker 2Oh yeah, really be fraudulent. It's, I'm out here performing. I'm performing and then snoring in a beach chair on camera. You
Speaker 3have to have both. You can't have one and not the other gang.
Speaker 2That's fair. We can't have it all. That sounds, that's just, it's too tiring. It's too much. It's too tiring.
Speaker 3All right, everyone. I hope you nap in a beach chair this week.
Speaker 2Yeah, me too.
Speaker 3Love you, mean it.
Speaker 2Love you, mean it.
Speaker 3Bye.
SpeakerSippin
Speaker 2with
Speakerthe Shannon's. for sippin with the Shannon's. This
Speaker 9podcast was produced by me, Bridget Shannon. Music is written and performed by Matt Derosiers. You can find his band, Super Stoker, anywhere you listen to music.
