Working 9 to 5

On this week's episode, Colleen wasn't prepared for the bar and Bridget has a lisp (mind ya business). Then we get into the topic of the week... good golly! It's Miss DOLLY PARTON. We're working 9 to 5 and we're sick of it!! Imagine being such an icon you have your own amusement park and have never been on a single ride. May we all be more like Dolly and look as good as she does at nearly 80 years old!!

"I'm not offended by all the dumb blonde jokes because I know I'm not dumb.. and I also know that I'm not blonde." - Dolly Parton

Sources:

• Wikipedia

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Transcript

0:24

It was the song I was feeling. Well, there was two songs actually on my way. Just if I can sing it on my, no. A little backstory. Jesus Christ. Little backstory on my way to work today, two things came on. One is every day I am Hustling. Hustling. And I said, you know what? Yeah, that that tracks you Ain't wrong. And the other 1, 9, 2 5 Way to make Bailey. You know, the older we get, the more that attacks never give you credit. Digging in, no giving or some shit like that, I don't know. But lemme tell you, that shit hurt. Nine to five is I'm obsessed with Dolly Parton and I always have been. Nine to five is an excellent song. In combining that with everyday I am hustling. It makes complete sense to me. No mess. We should get a good mashup. Someone mash that up. Thank you. Wherever you are, mash that shit up and you're welcome. You're welcome. You are welcome. Awesome. I'm really glad you said that.'cause today's episode will be great then. See my You're welcome. Went to Moana. You are welcome. Yeah. That's where I went. Okay. But hi everybody. Hi. Welcome to this week's episode of Sipping with the Shannon's. We're cousins and every other week we sit down, we sip on some wine, we talk some shit, and we have a good giggle. I am Brit Shannon. And I'm Colleen Shannon. How the heck are ya? I'm good. I'm sipping on an nap. Ross Spritzy. A little, some no wet mouth. Wi Colleen did truly my favorite thing, which is she showed up. That's it with She came, she saw She got good. No, she came with a Greek, so I, no, a pasta salad, Greek salad, which is even better. Mm-hmm. Because there's pasta in it. Mm-hmm. Steak tips cooked by the man's On a grill? Yes. With barbecue chicken and garlic. Chicken. 10 outta motherfucking 10 man's. I don't, I haven't met you yet. Lots of brownie points for him tonight. Lots of'em. We haven't revealed the pod yet. Well, like he knows about it, but we don't talk about it. What the fuck do you mean? Okay. Background on this? I didn't say anything about it. Just'cause like, like he knows I come here and he knows we drink and we yap. But like, to the extent, I don't know. You're scared because you mentioned this before, that you're like scared. It's, it's not fear because I know that he doesn't judge me. That's not it. Gang don't think this is a red flag. It's a it's a personal problem. You know, I'm not, well, I just, I don't listen to the pod. Right. So therefore I can't Yes. Did say this. Can't I? It's an unknown to me that I don't know if I wanna make him susceptible to like, I, I just, I'm, I don't want listen, I don't want you to listen. I just don't Maybe, I mean, he likes to listen to you, which is why he's dating you, so. I know. But the first thing don't looking at it I'm gonna do is be like. I'm probably gonna be like, tell him not to listen. And because me telling, I know him, he is gonna wanna listen, which makes it even worse. Like it's gonna entice him more and then he's gonna listen and I just, I don't want to, I just want it to be like kinda like, oh, it's this casual thing that I do. And like, don't worry about it. What if you cherry picked episodes for him? What if you were like, based off of what you like, I think you would like this episode. This episode and this one. Okay. Maybe that's a good idea. But yeah, no, Aaron brought it up once and was like, did you know that Col is podcast? And he was like, no. And this is like literally first week. Like this was not like, shout out to your roomie, Aaron. Thank you Erin. I didn't for supporting the pod more than my cohost gang. It's like, just hear me out. You know? Like, you guys know me well enough at this point. Like you can't be surprised by this. You've talked about some, some things, as you would say, some Tings, some Tings and I on this podcast. It's not that he doesn't, it's not that I wouldn't want him to know or like keep things from him. I wouldn't keep them from him. I just, maybe not right now. Yeah, maybe like six months from now. It's just like we're good right now. Like just. I'm not trying to advertise. Okay. That's all. Yeah. And in six months you could be like, just listen to everything. After we started dating and then he has like months of or to listen to, or if we got married, like maybe after the wedding he can listen, it's too late. Then it's too solidified. Isn't Tuesday now? Say also someone helped Justin Bieber. What is happening with him? I have associated from Justin Bieber like years ago. It's so bad. I never even like Hailey Bieber either. When people are like, she's like iconic. I'm like, she's wearing business casual outfits. I'm not. No, I totally disagree. I do not think she's iconic at all. Thank you. I Okay, cool. Yeah, no, we're on the same page enough with the Hailey Bieber smoothie or whatever it is. Get airmont outta my face. Yeah, in road or whatever her. Oh, I have, I've had a couple, two tree road. Not impressed. I'm not impressed by road at all. Her makeup routine. I'm like, why are we all. Pretending like this is it. You have good jeans. Be grateful. That's what you have. You don't have good makeup. Makeup, you have good jeans. Shut up. You have great skin and good jeans. And Monday, shut your mouth. They not like us. They not like us. And husband that hates you. Sorry. He does. Yeah. He, I guess, recently put on an Instagram post like, oh yeah. I told her she'd never be on the cover of Vogue because she is right now or going to be. And he was like, yeah, flashback to when we got into a huge fight.'cause I was like, you'll never do that. Love you. Glad you did it. And people were like so you're telling me she sees that, sorry, my, like, she's been stalking him for years as it turns out, she wants to skid him and wear him as a coat. I'm convinced. I mean, I respect the hustle. Yeah. I mean, she got what she wanted, so I just, it's giving a true manifestation. It's giving, it's giving voodoo, it's giving mama juju. No, I'd get me on Etsy to those witches. I'll pay someone. Push bail. No, she's, she paid, she had her father because she could, she had the Baldwins pay a buffalo load of money. She, we had money. We'd be married to who? I still think I'd be single. Oh, I'm not single because I don't have money. I'm single.'cause men are trash, you know what I mean? I don't think it's a money situation. Oh, it's probably, it could be a money situation for me. I'm just kidding. That's fair. That's totally fair. I'm just kidding. You can't even say that anymore. You went No, we had the finance conversation. I was like, to be clear there, you ain't gonna find nothing here. I need you to know. Early days. I'm gonna just let you know. Day die. I'm mentally unwell. There's medication in my drawer and also she pour and we are in financial ruin. The government, we got a not well family, not well bank account and not well me. So do it that way. You will. Take it or leave it, you know? You know what, Colleen? No. He, he responded well. The honesty is key. The honesty is key Here. You have to be yourself. You can't hide and then pop out like three years from now. When you're engaged, it's, it's good. To be honest, it. Day dot, I mean, it took me like four drinks to be like me. What's in your bank account? But it was on par with, like, Mike says, negative 20. I'm like, so that debt we have back there, he knows about the IRS. Oh. He'd be knowing, I told him. Okay, good. Is he, you don't have to like give me too many of his private details. No. Is he? Well, like he's fine. Chilling. He's cruising. He has a weird situation.'cause his, it's family owned business, right? He works so flexibility there. He's blue collar man. Works for family owned business. Yeah. So like every cousin we have. So there's flexibility so that the, the conversation started.'cause I had asked like, how does that work? Yeah. Because it's not like your standard, you're not union, you're not going for an hourly. It's just very, it's, it's weird. So off book. Yeah. It's, no, it's extremely off book. So I was asking you about it, so it spiraled into that convo and I was like, cool. Is laundering questionable? Is it, oh no. Is it front? No, it's smart. It's smart. It's, they're doing it in school. Yeah. Yeah. Very old. Old school legal. Do they write in a book of when customer, no, they have a apparel system. They have a payroll system? No, no, I mean about their customers. Oh, is it like saw this customer at X date? No, they have like a system. Oh, okay. That's good. Yeah, that's good. They're like on the. On the internets, they're on the web. Yeah, they're on the web. They're on the worldwide. They like, I think they have Google reviews, like I think it's, I think we're good website. I don't think so. They have merch. That's You're legit. Oh. Oh my God. I want merch. Me too. When it gets more official between you and him.'cause I'll burn it. Yeah. If, if it does work out. I am a hundred percent buying merch. Yeah. He actually was like, you can take the one in my clo, like the ones in my closet. I'm like, so you have five things to your name and that's one of them. You can keep it. You, you know what, sir? I'll let you have this one, but you holler at me when you order more. How about that hall at your girl? Here's my size, here's my colors. Dude, he bought me sweatshirt that was like an extra large and he was like, well I didn't, I didn't know and I want you to be offended. And I obviously was like so thoughtful if you, and also like, it's fine. I played it off. I'm like, I had boobs. That's okay. Meanwhile, I'm like, is that what you think of me? That's my old size. You bitch. No, I'm just kidding. But he was like, I know that you like the oversized. I'm like, you're not wrong. You do love oversized shit. You're not wrong. He's like, I don't think you're that size. I was like, it's okay. Ugliest sweatshirt ever. I'm not mad at you Ugliest sweatshirt I've ever seen. Love him though. I will say, I remember you texted me about one time he picked you up and I felt this so deeply as someone who was like, never pick up sizable. Mm. And people who know, know if you are also like this. I'm like, if can't pick me up, because if you pick me up and something happens to you, I will never recover. Like if you rupture a disc, if you even pull a muscle, it's over. The moment you go like, I, we, I can't look you in the eye. I have to move out of the country. We're done. We're done here. If so, if you pick me up, you better do it with your fucking legs. Your, if I hear a grunt, not your back. If I see an eye twitch, I'm out. If you make one iota of a noise, I'm gonna lose my fucking mind. Hmm. He's learned. So unless you are Thor, unless you're Jason Momoa, proceed with caution. Agreed. I saw what startled me to have that thought, actually I saw someone I know from like high school's wedding video and in it, it's them dancing and he picks her up and he struggles. And I damn near lost it. I was like, couldn't be me. If that divorce, we would not finish the evening. I would be out. No, simply no. No, not at the wedding. So I told you, this happened to me at my 16th birthday. Yes, of course. One of the worst thing that's ever happened to me. Shall we not forget this? This boy, his name is Ivan. Shout out to you Ivan, for embarrassing me in front of literally every friend and family member that I have, including you. By the way, Colleen was like seven. I don't even remember. You were No, I was, it was like 16. Was this the year that it wasn't your real birthday? Yes. Okay. Yeah. That I do remember. Yeah. It was in March. My birthday's in August. Cool. And you were, so you were eight. That's crazy. I do remember, yeah. You were eight, you were Gretchen. Mm-hmm. And a boy picked me up and I'm five eight for the record, for those who do not know that, and he's probably on his best day. Five, six. What? And he dropped me and I was so embarrassed. And our cousins, Sean and Tom walked right over, and Sean scooped me off at the ground, spun me around, like I weighed less than a feather, and then just glared at Ivan and walked off the dance floor. And it was such a baller fucking like, I would never have recovered. If it wasn't for Shawn, what would we do without that? Sean just looked at him like, you peasant, you weak little man. I need, I need to wear is Ivan today segment. I also, I guess he's a, a wonderful drawer. Guess he's out here. He's an artist. Yeah, he's an artist and he's out here drawing some shit. That's what I hear on the streets. I don't know though. We do not stay in touch. I've never been able to look him in the eye again, so he'd be dead to me. He would be the reason I'd be on the Etsy for the spouses. The May. You've never gained a pound of muscle ever again for what you've done or an inch in any direction Done. You'll stay that height. You'll shrink Ivan. Are you ready for practical magic too to come out? Yes and no. Because I have, you know how I feel about, I know. It's tricky. And I think it's next year too. It's not even this year. No, it's not. We, we got some time to worry about it. Yeah. We got some time. Yeah.'cause Hocus pocus didn't really, didn't really, are you shitting me? It didn't hit at all. I was trying to be nice. No, it didn't hit. Don't be nice. Well I was just thinking like, I was thinking about the other gener, the next generation growing up and watching it and like maybe they got something out of it. We did not. Mm. No. Because I think that was our main problem was it was trying too hard to like, like just let it be for us. Let it be for the people. Like for the OG fans. Same with like Lilo and Stitch. Like get the kids outta here. Okay. Have you seen how fucking cute she is though? I know there is place to, I mean, that little girl is the character in real life. Oh she is. It's crazy. Her in Nessa Rose. The little girl who plays baby Nessa in the wheelchair, met on the red carpet the other night. Kill me. Kill me. Squat it up slowly. Oh God. I'm not ready for wicked two anyway. What, what are you up to? What's new? Okay. I have random thoughts. Yeah, tell me about your life. Okay, cool. But this weekend didn't do much. Went to the Red Sox, finally got my motherfucking hot dog. Couldn't have been happier about it. Love that for you. I got really drunk, ate the hot dog, fell asleep in the car. Mm. Not great for me. Someone had to take my shoes off. Man's had to take my shoes off. Wasn't great. I never do that. Usually Aaron falls asleep and I bring her home. I don't fall. I don't fall asleep in O Ubers ever. No. But the shoe taking off. No. Colleen, do you know the beauty of this podcast? I could take off my own shoes. Colleen, do you know the beauty of this podcast? You can run it back. Yep. Receipts, proof, timeline, screenshots, fucking everything. Sorry. Don't use my Real Housewives against me. Yeah. Sorry. I got real Colleen on you right there. It's fine. I'm gonna overlook it. We forgive, but we don't forget. Insult me with a read from RuPaul's Drag Race once and we'll be even. Okay, cool. Noted. I'll add that to my, quite literally, add that to my notes because I will forget. Sure. Oh God, I just had a stroke. I had two thoughts at the same time. My first thought was looking at my notes, second thought was man's is appalled by my notes because I write everything down to remember. Yeah, it's terrifying. And he's just confused about it. He's like, you really, it looks like a mental patient. So when I say I'm gonna write that down, like I, I mean it. And he just realized that and was like, oh. And I was like, I'll add it to my li like the list. And he is like, you really keeping lists. Like, yes. You don't keep lists. The fuck's wrong with you. What do you know? Oh, you know what else is wrong with him? I decided when we were like, we haven't found something wrong. Found something wrong. He doesn't drunk eat well. He like will, but like it makes him like sick. No, I wanna come home and I wanna eat chicken nuggets. I'm, is he drinking beer? Yeah. That's why. No, I know. But like he literally does not have the capacity. You've been slugging a martini all night, which is just a cup of vodka, which is just bullshit. You're gonna make me come home and eat by myself. Eat the french fries with me. No. At least pretend so. He does sometimes, but I, I, I think it just like, it's a, depends on what he was drinking or how drunk he is. Yeah. But like, he's like, no, I literally can't put that in my body. I will be sick. I'm like, I don't care. Shove it down. Your gullet, you've shove so many beers down,'em, shove some chicken nuggets and make me feel better. It's okay Colleen. Just eat your chicken nuggets in peace. I don't wanna eat them alone. It's sad. It's, it's so, that's what's wrong with him. How dare he? The Red Sox lost. Don't care about them. Go Socks. Saturday I died a little bit inside. Oh, we went to go see Erin run her half marathon, but we were moving a little slow. It was a whole debacle, unwell. I wasn't gonna go. And he said That's how drunk you were at the Red Sox. Yeah. And he was like, no, like we're gonna go. And I was like, so I don't wanna move. And he like turned on the lights and shit. Hated that. Oh my God. I love him. I Someone has to kick your ass, Colleen. I'm so like, not literally, but you know what I mean? Like someone's gotta just light whatever makes your body get up. I would like to know what it is. This man is my hero. Shock therapy. Like, I dunno, an electric shock. I, I have no l lobotomy. I don't know, to get you a call. I would love that. That would get me outta bed. Shock call, bro. Okay. Yeah, go ahead. We went to go see Erin winter. Her half marathon made it after she had finished, but she didn't know that, so I was like, I texted her and said, I've been looking for you. And she, we walked up as she like finished. So it was just like, we were like, what? Yay. Go girl. She doesn't listen, so she won't, she'll never know this, but yeah. And she was like, oh my God, you guys have to come. And I'm like, she's like, I know you're unwell. And I was like, oh no. Anything for you. Did e literally dragged me here? No, we got a coffee. I was literally gonna shit in my pants. I had two coffees like. It was not good. Um, Literally going to shit my pants. I was like sweating in the car. Uh, But no, I was peacefully peaceful in the car. The music's on and the windows are down. I'm like literally clenching my ass. That was Oh, and sat. So I went home, went to bed, awoken, went to go meet up with him at Sam Walker's which is the sister restaurant to Lucy's, and I go to Lucy's all the time. So I was like amped up about it. Yeah. So people who don't know Sam Walker's for people around here, it's, it's right on Montvale. It's right on Newburn across from Regina's in McDonald's, in Old Bickford's. I think Bickford's is still there, right? No, I think it's closed, but it's, it's literally CRO from Bickford's. Bickford's was 24 7 and we used to go get drunk breakfast all the time. That makes me so sad. So it's been a bunch of different restaurants and. You think it's gonna be a bar and it's attached to a Best Western Holiday Inn. Yeah. Best Western off. It's attached to a Best Western. Best Western. So when you see the parking lot, you're like, oh, this must be for the hotel. No, no, no, no, no. This bar, it could fit 1000 people comfortably. It's, it's huge. Massive in people. We went on a Wednesday one once months ago. Me and my girlfriends, it was popping off on like a Wednesday, a week before Christmas. Like I can't even imagine it. On a Saturday night. Yeah, no. So I wasn't expecting it either because Lucy's on a fucking Saturday night is nothing like that. So he was like, come in for a drink. I'm like, okay, sure. Slay. But I'm in bed. Went in biker shorts, no underwear, no bra. And I was like, I'm gonna borrow a sweatshirt because I don't have anything to wear. And I'm like, cool. So I didn't have an ounce of makeup on. My hair was down though. I'll give myself that. And I had perfume on, so like I didn't smell. But I walk in and I am shook it to my core. There's people everywhere and full ass going out close. North shore's finest in jeans. Cute tops. I saw like Chanel like, it was crazy. I was like, wait a minute. Heels, he, yeah. Booties, like heels, booties, wedges. I was like, what the fuck? I looked, were you so mad at him? Like a little lad. So he comes again. I couldn't be mad. And he like came and got me and it was like, oh, whatever. Stupid little fucker. And then we get to And he got you a drink? Yeah, he got me a drink approached me with sangria. Can't be mad about that. And then I approach, he's not with the boys. The girly pops are there. So you're making me meet newer? Well, I knew some of them, but not all of them. New people looking in the way that I did. And you did not forewarn me. No. Cruel unspeakables on? No. Not a, so, not a single unmentionable, no nipples to the wind stitched out. It's hot as fuck. I'm on the outside bar. It was so humid out. I wanted to die. And what did you get from his closet to help your outfit that made you so hot? Colleen. A fleece cortisone of. It was Patriots, the knowing she's in a Bruins t-shirt. Yeah, I had a bruise t-shirt, so I was like, lemme change Patriot quarter with a stain on it. Well, with, and I didn't discover the stain until I was already on my way. No bra, no panties, nothing. And so I'm just sandals in. Yeah. Sandals. But new people, new humans, immediate, Hey, this is Colleen for the very first time. So I'm immediately being like, it's hilarious how to go in his closet. Ha ha ha. Every time I saw any person, oh my god, so sorry. Excuse me. I had to go in this fucker's closet making jokes'cause I'm like gonna die. But it was fine. It's so funny because any girl knows, like you say, oh this is what I plan on wearing tonight. Like everyone is on the same page. Yeah. And I'm, he, I'm sure when you walked in he was like, oh, she looks so cute. Oh, care at all. He definitely set you up. But it's just such a man thing to do, to not be like, okay, the other girls are wearing who I'm with are wearing X, Y, and Z. And if you don't have that and you don't feel comfortable, that's totally fine. So he's legit normally like that. So that's why I was like, not. And then when I was walking up, I kind of had an instinct'cause people were leaving and like legit curb clothes. And I was like, WTF we're at like El Lucy's dupe right now. Like what the fuck? But yeah, no, I I, it's fine. The next time they see me better be at a fucking wedding. I better be in a gown With a train or something. Yeah. I prom. Full prom. Yeah. No, a hundred percent. We'll, we'll redeem ourselves for the girly pops, but they understood the girls get it. Yeah, the girls, the girls get it. I had to explain it, but then I wanted to make sure they really heard me. And I don't dress like this normally, so I like repeated myself a bunch. They're probably like, is this girl broken? I'm like, ha ha. Over and over again. Isn't this hilarious how underdressed I am? I'm like, laugh. Can we all find it funny now? I found, I got a real bra. I've been wearing it to work with like a wire. Oh, I don't own bras. Sorry. Sorry, I don't own brass like at all. Well, I know you wear boob tape a lot. Yeah. I wear boob tape or I wear, if I have to like legit wear a bra to work, like, it's usually like a bralet type of situation. Like it's, it's not like a You wear like a sports bra? Kind of, but not really. Like it's a strap. No. You don't have a bra? No.'cause I don't like the way they make me feel or look and they squeeze my back fat. So I just don't own any but one how to start wearing it. Let me tell you, I looked like a prostitute at work today. I was like, where? Oh, were, were the titties up to the dogs? Yeah. I was like, put them away. Yeah, put'em away. I didn't like that. There's a way to tastefully raise them. Yeah. Without looking like a hoe. It wasn't even like a padded like situation. It was just, it was not right. I shaved one of my legs today. Just one. You did tell me that I did shave One was an accident. She forgot I got a really bad sunburn last week. The worst sunburn I've had in like a decade. I literally don't feel bad for you. No, it's not. I'm not looking for sympathy. I'm just letting people know. Good. Don't, I was fighting for my life. Great. First time with your skin. First day. Yeah. A hundred percent Great. This season I'm taking a break from what design Every fucking year. Yep. You did mention that too. Not a break break, but like one day a week. Okay, so one day a week versus two to three. Yes. Okay, great. And, and I'm finding peace. 50% down. Yeah. Last week was my first week of it and I loved it. Loved it. I found so much peace. I woke up and you know, you just forget what it's like to like wake up and like not have to go anywhere and like get a coffee and go for a walk. I don't get to do those things. Yeah. My favorite thing to do is wake up, if I don't have anything to do a Saturday morning is sleep in a little bit, but then wake up, have my Celsius make like a, a little bit of breakfast. That's yummy. And read a book. It's just so lovely. Lovely. It's fucking lovely. So I don't like, I sit in confusion'cause I'm like, what do I do today? Yeah. What do I do with my body? You get to pick. Yeah. That's crazy. I haven't done that in so fucking long. You get brunch. I'm a big brunch girl. I actually prefer lunch, but. Still, I would do brunch literally any day with anyone. I just, IM a lunch girl myself. I love the, but I love the theme of brunch. I should say. I would prefer lunch food, but I want to go to brunch. I like everything that comes with a brunch. Yeah, like a boozy brunch. Yeah. Just like the vibes of a we're gonna go get yummy food. We're going to yap we're gonna laugh for hours. There will probably be some music playing and we're gonna day drink and I'm gonna go home. I'm gonna take a nap. I'm gonna wake up, order food, watch a movie, and still get to go to bed all in one day and not wake up and feel like shit. No, no. It's, I haven't done brunch in years. We're gonna brunch, period. Okay. Can I tell you a crazy restaurant thing that happened to me the other day? And I've been meaning to ask you what? It's on my list, but we're kind of on this theme anyway. No. Say speak. Speak truth. So I actually really like this place, so me and I, I've been there a few times and then I went with one of my best friends from college, Jessie, who you know. And so after dinner, we were like bopping around a bit and. I get in my car and I drive home and I look in the back of my phone and my credit card's not in my shit. and I'm like, oh my God, I left it in the credit card when they, they give you the book, right? So I'm like, oh shit, I think I left it at the restaurant. I have not done this. I am not kidding you. In 15 years, I've not left my,'cause it wasn't like leaving it at the bar. I legit put it in and walked like, it just was so silly, right? So I get home and I call them and they were like, we open at four. And I was like, okay, I'm gonna come tomorrow and I'm gonna come get it. They were like, great. I show up at four, like 4 0 5, the doors are locked. I was writing an errand to be clear in the middle of a workday and I thought this was gonna be like zip and zip out. So I, my hazards are on and there's no parking around me, so I quite literally thought I was gonna walk in here. They were like, show your license and that will be it because you work at a restaurant. That's basically how it works. Yeah. Don't even ask the license. I'm here, take it, get it off my hands. And so I have to call them and be like, can you open the front door? I'm sorry to like be this person and be the first one in. And so some guy like rolls his eyes while he is opening the door and I'm like, thank you. Also, these are your hours. These are your literal business hours you told me to show up at this time. So I go in and I'm like yeah, I left my card here. I have my license out. And he's like, what's the name? And I'm like, how many people have left their credit cards here? And I'm, but like, Hey, whatever. It's a bar in slash restaurant. And so I give him my name and he's like, I wasn't the manager on last night. Let me call him. I'm like, all right. And then do they take them with them? And then I just see this man walking around the restaurant and just like going into this room and going into that room. And our waitress from the night before was there and she was like, oh my God, Cosmo with Tito's. And I was like, yep, yes, bitch. That would be me. And so we're chatting and it's just take, like, we're talking about the weather, we're talking about where we're from. Like I'm essentially on a first date with this girl and I'm like, he hasn't come out yet. He comes out and he's like, let me call the other manager. I can't find it. And I'm like, you don't have a a, a place that you put the cards. There's one place. He goes, I, there are two places. And I check both of, they're not there. He calls the manager from the night before and he is like, oh, so and so was cleaning up. I think he has it. I think he put it somewhere. So he goes, let me call this third guy. I'm looking at my car because this place is known for towing and like giving massive tickets. So I'm just watching my car while all of this happens. And I heard him yelling at the guy he was on the phone with and being like, you should have been here already. Like what? Mean, what do you mean? What job are you Work? He's like, you're supposed to be here. I'm like, now I'm uncomfy.'cause I'm like listening to this man yell at his waiter. And he is like, sorry about that. So there's a money book and they put it in the money book in our head server took it with him and he's not working tonight and he'll be here soon. And I went, can I just ask you a quick question? And I said it just like this. I didn't, I didn't get bitchy, I just went, could you tell me why my credit card would ever leave the premises? Just asking for friends. Just like, why, why would it? And he just kept talking about the money book and I just went. Okay. All of this to say there was no street parking. So I had to go to a garage, walk back to the restaurant, and as I was walking up the street, I saw a guy run in hand something to the manager and then peel out. And then as I walked up to the restaurant, the manager to his credit was like, I'm really sorry, here's a$25 gift card. And I was just like, all right, it's fine. And he goes, it's really not. And I went, I mean, at least he's aware. And I was like, okay, have a good night. It was the weird, it was like 40 minutes. It was the weirdest, it would've been like, I'm getting a new card to keep it. Have you ever taken someone else's credit card home? No, but I know that there is a movement of some sort.'cause we put the cards in the cash drawer, so if they're moving cash, maybe to like a different safe or like a, or the bank or like wherever, wherever that lead server was bringing it to. I guess maybe it could be in there, but it shouldn't. The way I watched this man run full tilt into this restaurant and in that moment he knew. He knew he fucked up. I have personal beef with my Pilates instructor. Why is that? She personally attacks me and I don't enjoy it. And it's not because I'm not, I'm doing anything wrong. She just like loves to nitpick me. She comes over and she's like, babes. She goes, babes. It's kind of like when guys go chief, or like, I'm like, pal over. You're like, you, you're fucking pal. Don't over and talk to me while I'm doing things. Is she critiquing you as well? Yes and no, but it's like things that don't really matter and me and my friend, we go together because she's an instructor now. She did like the whole training. And so like I, I'm next to her and like, she's like, no, that was crazy. Like you literally didn't do anything wrong. And like, I get that like, form is like important or whatever. Is she doing it to other people? No. It's just you. So the past like three times we're like, oh my God, why is so-and-so, like, why are we like beefing? Like she wants, she has it out for me. I don't know what it is. She be at her house. She literally calls me babes. Babes is gross. Don't like that. She comes over. You know that what she said to me this morning, what I was laying down flat and my ponytail was like, kind of like in the well of like the reformer and like, it's fine. It's not like a safety issue or whatever. It's and she came over and goes, she's like, can we not like have our head dangling in space? I was like, isn't that kind of point goes, can we scooch down? And I was like, sh, sure. And like I looked at my friend, a different friend, and I was like, and she even was like, could not, she started dying laughing.'cause she's like, no. Like she only does it to me, I swear. And I get, again, it's a safety issue I guess. But you can't really stand on the reformer without putting your hands on the thing.'cause it's not safe. But it's also like, how can you even give this woman feedback without every, like, there's not even a way to be like, I don't know, I How do you Like, there's just like a li like, I would just be like, oh God, you girl. Like, instead of being like, yeah, you're being a little snippy. Yeah. Like your response. Like, okay, and then don't do this job. What? Like, why are you coming for me? And like, I get that they were trying to like help or whatever, but at the same time I'm like, why are you only doing it to me? And at one time she corrected me and I literally go, do you hate me? I don't understand what this beef this woman has with me. And what'd she say? Did she laugh? She like, didn't, I think she might've giggled and like walked away or something. I don't even know. She's like, thinks her picking up on, it's also like embarrassing because like she has to like put her mic to the side. It's in the middle of class. Like it's not, there's a mic involved. Yeah. She has a mic on it. Oh, I don't like this. And I didn't like that at all. And she did um, you know what she said? So I don't know if this makes any sense, but you're not allowed to stand on it without putting your hands on like the what are you ta You have to explain to some people. What the fuck? It's about's. Like a former machine, like, you know what they are? You've probably seen'em on Instagram, but they move, they move with you. It's like a little, it's like a, a contraption, a machine. Mm-hmm. If you will. So you can't stand on it'cause it moves. So if you're standing on it, it's like not safe. It's like being on a skateboard, I guess. I don't know. Yeah. So you have to hold onto something. And like, sometimes I just don't, like if I'm just standing there, like fixing my, my leggings, like I, I'm fixing my leggings. I'm just standing. Yeah. I'm doing something. And then she's like, was using the open one next to me for like a demo one time, and she's like looking at me and she's like, she's like right in front of me. You can do that right in front of me. Because it's like, I guess like a big no-no, relax. And I literally was like, I didn't even know what she was at. Like, it was bizarre. She, and she did that to me like an hour later and she's like, ah. Ow. She literally did that. She's like, again, I was like, stop yelling at me. But that's all. I just wanted to share that. Okay. I have a personal vendetta with Julie. Noted Etsy, Mitch, here we come with. Yep. Only other things on here is I'm back on the audio books. I listen to 21 chapters of an audio book today. It's once you get on them, it's, it's hard. It's like a drug. It's like crack. I'm on a nineties country kick. I can't stop listening to it. It gets my pussy popping. Great. I have an egg ick right now. No one cares, but in case you want it to know, I have a really bad egg. Ick. Get the eggs outta here. So the new hyper fixation is hating eggs and liking grilling. I love a good grill situation. That's fair. I think I know how to use it now. I've been watching a lot. Do you know what I love is the hibachi. I do love hibachi. Love hibachi. Like their veggies and their chicken just hit different, it hits different. I don't know what's in their sauce. I don't know if it's because they make it in front of you and they're doing fucking fire, volcanoes and shooting sake into people's mouths. It's the entire experience. I love it. I started Black Mirror. And the most recent season, I watched the first episode and I was sad. Oh, not, isn't it awful? I wasn't spooked. I didn't feel spooky. No, it's not really a spooky season. I was sad. Yeah, that's the one I said last episode. Like I cannot stop thinking about Rashida Jones and Chris O'Dowd. I didn't like that. Oh my God. The guy at work, when the pictures hung at work and then he gets injured on the job. Or when she's at school and the little girl is like, they make fun of me. And she's like, no, they're vintage. Your sneakers are cool. Like don't worry, you don't have money. And then one of the commercials is a sneaker ad. They're only 200. I wanted to die. I wanted to die. Hated it. Made me so sad. I'll let you know. I'll keep watching it. And a deadly American marriage on Netflix. Yes. Did you watch it? Yes. What were your thoughts? So this is between the husband that was murdered. The wife and the dad. Right. The, they're Irish. It's both sides. Yeah, it's both sides. And the kids are Irish. Yeah. I mean, what were your, what did you feel it was giving Karen Reed? Yeah. To be totally honest with you, my knee jerk reaction is what? To just side with women. Like every single trial, if I ever got called to jury duty, I cannot be impartial. I am impartial to women, period. I did say I did that point fucking blank period. Last jury. It is really hard to hear the kid's side of the story. I mean, I think she did it. I mean, I think they did it. I do too. And it, it just sucked.'cause I was like, I don't want to believe this, but like when you hear that son and daughter when they're in the van and he's like, fuck'em. Like we're not, like our head's held high. I could have puked. Yeah. But I thought it's like a very interesting documentary in the way that they really do balance both, both sides. They really do. Like they show people who, and not just the people in the scenario, but people outside of it who stand on either side like strongly. Yeah. So to truly see the, and to kind of like at the end of it, go either way. But of course like those kids, I side with those kids, but like either way it fucking sucks. I would agree. Something's just off about her. Something ain't right. Yeah. You know what it reminds me of? I don't know if you watched this documentary, I was obsessed with it. It was on Hulu and this woman, she goes missing and she has two kids and a husband, and they look for her for months and she comes out. She's like screaming like weeks. Oh. Like the Gone girl weeks later, like the real gone girl and she ran away and had her like ex pick her up or whatever. She kind of reminded me of that woman. I could see it. Her lying to the people at the wedding and saying that we were, I was childhood friends with his dead wife. yeah, right. She was a freak. Yeah. So ain't right. Something ain't right. Those poor kids. Ugh. Rose and Fred West. Did you watch that? So I'll never, you know, we've talked a lot on this podcast about how I'll never do Chris Watts. I'll never do Casey Anthony. Number three is Fred and Rose. Never. Never Wild. Yep. I've heard it on every famous true crime hard fucking pass. Crazy disgusting disgust, like the most foul type of creature that exists on planet Earth. The, I've actually, out of all of them, we obviously watch a lot. The lack of, I've never seen or heard like documentary style or interview style. Someone with a lack of absolute anything in their voice to talk about things. So brutal. Yes. Psychopath. Like a true psychopath. So scary. Yeah. Terrifying. So scary. And they're just gross. They're just gross. They're so ugly in every fucking way that outside, inside, everywhere in between. Ick. Burn in the fiery pits of hell. But like in the documentary, I liked the documentary because I liked the way it played out.'cause I didn't really know too much. Like I knew the gist of it. But like how, just like high level, how does it play out? Like what happened? They play it out by starting off like as if you know nothing. Like they don't preset anything. And it's like the children are saying, oh, we have a sister that's underneath the patio and then it's them going through the patio and then finding the bodies and then they bring in a psychologist. And by like the thir second episode, the psychologist goes, they're outside because the inside's full. That has to be it. So then they go on the inside and it's just like the way they do it is like you're not expecting. If you know nothing about it, you're like shook it to your core. It's just the fucking, it's one of the worst up there with many others, but nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope. Won't catch it on this motherfucking podcast. No, no, no, no. I would never tell you that right now. But I thought the documentary was well done. That's awesome. Okay. Yeah, no, fair enough. Like I loved, loved, loved, loved the documentary. Don't Fuck With Cats. Never watched it. Oh my God. I like cats. It's so fucking good. And it's shot so well, and I appreciated the ending. And if you listen to this podcast at all, and you've seen it, you know why? It's just like, it's so, so well done. There are cat murders videotaped in, they show it's like Cruelty to Animals times one fucking thousand. And it's, it's so hard to watch, but it's like both things can be true. Fair enough. Yeah. And I'm gonna watch Handmaid's Tale. Have you ever watched Handmaids Tale? No, I was really confused because everyone was like, oh, you'd like it? And I was like, oh, cool. Victorian sleigh. And then all of a sudden it was like, in real people time. No, no, no, no. And I was like, I don't, I'm confused. So I just wanna know. And in Boston, yeah, I didn't know my girl. Okay. It's very interesting TV show to pick right now in the Times. But you have a different brain than I do, so I would finish a season of Handmaid's Tale and not sleep for a week. So Erin said I would absolutely love it. Yeah, I mean, it's definitely fucked up. It's dark. It's based off of book, so the writing's incredible. It's in Boston, there's a very strong female. There's a lot of things you will enjoy about it. It made me scared for everything that's about to happen in 50 years. I don't know if you'll have that same type of like thought process now. Yeah.'cause you don't really worry. You don't really think that. I don't even worry about tomorrow. We'll see. We'll see when we get there. Yeah. So we might react differently to it. And that's it. Actually, those are all my manic. Oh, okay. My manic ridiculous thoughts for the past 30 minutes. I realized in the last episode I never told people I watched a few other things. Oh, did we like cut you off and then continue with the story? No, I was cutting you off. Actually it was driving me crazy editing it. Oh, it's so funny'cause in the moment I don't hear it. And then when I listen back and I hear you go like, oh. Oh, I don't even notice. And I just like rah. Like just will not let you get an award at edgewise. It was driving me nuts. Oh, I don't even notice though. So, no, we didn't go off topic on that. Like we just did, or I just did, but I just completely forgot about these. And then as our listeners were listening, I was getting dms like, have you seen this? Have you seen this? And I was like, wait, yes. Maybe number one. Adolescence on Netflix. No idea. The story about the little girl who dies and the boy that they charged for his murder. No, Colleen, it's set in the uk. I've never even seen an ad for it. It's so fucking good. It's called Adolescence. Okay. And there are so many characters and there is so much happening. And every single episode is one singular take. There is an episode with a therapist that is absolutely outta control, but there's another episode, I think there's four total. They're in a school and they're talking to the kids at school while they're all outside in the choreography of teenagers to do one shot, and they're walking all over the school. It's not like they sit in one classroom and the whole shot is just this, they're walking up and down the stairs. There's a drill at one point where all of the school goes outside. It's like, how did you get all of these people to do this? One time? They, they took multiple takes. Yeah, but, but like they, if you messed up at minute 46 of an hour, they started back at one. So it's like wild to even watch, but it's really one well done. Very dark, very, very dark. You know, I love a dark Paradise on Hulu. What's it about? Sterling K. Brown in James Marsden, Sterling K. Brown is head of security for the president, right? And James Marsden's the president, and in the first episode, James Marsden gets murdered and Sterling K. Brown finds his body. I'm not giving anything away. This is like quite literally 15 minutes into the show and it's about what happens next. Twists turns, all the Ts. Great acting, great cast. Okay. You don't know. And on a cliffhanger, definitely gonna be a season two. Oh, I love that. When you know. Yeah, for sure. For sure, for sure. Love on the spectrum. Oh god, you guys. I have never watched the show. Okay. I don't know why I can't stop. I'm completely obsessed. I would die for Connor. We ride a dawn for Connor and his whole family. I want them to all get a reality TV show. I am obsessed with them. Connor and Georgie for life. I I'm not even through the end of season three, he just kissed her on the hand and asked her to meet his family. And she was like, yeah, of course. I can't, I'm obsessed with Tanner. He is literally sunshine in a human being. Abby and David in Africa. Oh my god, you guys, I die. Madison and Tyler are so cute. There are a few people from Boston on it. There's a girl named Perry. She's obsessed with the tea. She just wants to ride the tea all day with her friends. I die for her. Good for her. Perry James, he loves the renaissance fairs. King Richard. Fair picture him with a, a high, oh, a Turkey thigh. Turkey leg. It's delightful. It's the most wholesome. I love them. I wanna hug all of them. I wanna, they're like my new celebrities. I, when I ever walked in and you were like crying over the episode, I was like, no. I actually can't talk about it anymore. I'm gonna cry. Okay. Okay, great. Please don't. Um, I Jesse this weekend from college in her sweet bbe miles. He's so cute. And then I went to the Dublin or the next day with my friend Steven Cara, big fans of the pod. Yep, my besties. I got a full Sunday roast. If you have never been to England, I want you to know that on Sundays. Every single Sunday, there is a Sunday roast at someone's house, and a Sunday roast is like crispy potatoes, carrots, Yorkshire pudding. It's like a big puffy, oh my God. It's like a pastry. It's so good. And then there's either like beef or pork. Sometimes there's steak. Tons of gravy. Gravy. It's like Thanksgiving, but instead of Turkey, it's literally everything else. Interesting. And Sunday roast is much better. A very, very big deal. And then there's usually a game on the Dublin, serves a Sunday roast and plays soccer games, European soccer games. And I'm like, oh, this must be the spot. So we were there all like so long. And then of course the games end live music immediately comes on and it's like, no nay never. And I'm like, I love it here. I would like to live here. I have no, no. The last three times I went to the Dublin, her fucking slapped. Every time. I do have Invisalign. I don't have it in right this moment. I actually need to go brush my teeth so I can put it back in and I hate it. I'm No, but you'll love it in the end. I hope so. So I'm a month in of nine months, and some of my friends think I'm crazy. They're like, your teeth are fucking fine. What are you talking about the guys? I'm not kidding. The bottom is shifting and basically the longer you wait, the more expensive it gets, yada, yada, yada. I have a lisp and so if you hear me say something with a lisp, it's none of your business. And please don't comment. I'm fragile. Okay? I have to fucking floss my teeth every day. The color of the retainer is starting to tint because like even with cleaning crystals, like that's just Yeah, how it works. My teeth look fucking yellow. No, I don't think they do. No, I don't have it in right now, Colleen. No, I know. I don't mean right now. I. I, no, it's driving me insane. I hate the lis. The other day when I was with Steve and Kara, I rinsed them out in the sink.'cause you're supposed to like brush do this thing and then pop'em back in. And I put too much water in the tray. So when I shoved them back in my mouth, I went out and as I was talking, just water was spitting out of them because I flooded the fucking retainer. I have flooded the other day. I was with Lean and she's like, the way you describe them, they're like teeth spanks. And I was like, that actually is the best description. They're so thin and they're so fucking tight, and you can feel your teeth moving in the middle of the day and it's such a weird sensation it's a wild experience. So if you hear a lisp mind new, a fucking business. Last, but certainly not least, we need to discuss the topic of Rin. Okay. I did not know the lore. I have never used Rin. I do not know Rin. She does not know me. I get deathly ill, as you all know, I was sick for two full weeks. I could not breathe. I went through four boxes of tissues. I cannot, that's obscene. I could not breathe. Not, and I love Mucinex. Nothing was working. There was no out, like nothing was working. And I was in a work meeting and my coworker said, you need to go and get Arin. Severe congestion, whatever. It's like at any target, CVS, wherever you get your shit. So I was puppy sailing Pepe, and on the way home I was like, I ran through, she has like a box of tissues on her desk. I went through a corner of them. I was like, oh, enough is enough. You bitch has gotta breathe. It's been two weeks, it's not like four days. And I'm like, Ew. Where? Day 14, the, the end has not come. I'm never gonna breathe again. So I go, I buy Rin. I look like a drug addict. I was like, where is the Rin? So I get the Rin, I go home, two puffs, and I said, life is good. The birds are chirp. I can see the flowers. I can smell the flowers. I am me. I am me. I am better, and life is worth living. Speaking of Justin Bieber, i'm on the other side. Okay. And, and I post something to that effect on Instagram, which was just silly and stupid. And I was like, I don't know. Maybe other people also can't breathe and need this. I cause an uprising. I have never, outside of someone dying, never gotten more dms in my life to the aff African community. I am sorry. I did not know. I did not know. I've never had it. I know that you've been addicted. I know that you're now scared. I also will get addicted. I have not, you're supposed to take it. At most two times a day for three consecutive days, everyone was like, bridge go. Like I had people screaming in my dms immediately. I think it was one minute before I got a dm and then for the next 24 hours. That's crazy. Never in my life I set the internet ablaze over Rin guys. People feel really strongly about rin as it turns out how fast it worked and how well I actually said out loud the next day. I understand drug addiction. I could wake up every morning and take that. And I said, AEN taught me how to breathe for the first time. I've never taken a deep breath before. Aen, you could smell colors and so I could smell. Yes, Colleen. Yes. And so basically if you take it too much, you get an actual addiction to it. And this thing called rever, I learned this in my dms from nurses. It's called reverse congestion. And it essentially, yeah, because your body gets addicted to it and it needs it, your body will keep being congested. So you legitimately cannot live without it. And every morning you have to take it and it's like you have a full dependency and cannot breathe. So you have to take it three days off, three days on, take a couple more days off and, but cannot. So there's, everyone was sending me that Nap Tazi sketch where he talks about his dad going to the doctor and they ask him, do you use Arin? And he's like, no. And his mother goes, be honest. And he goes, I've been using it for 45 years. I've never seen that, but that's right. Oh, it's so much. And Azi is like, for the record, the back of the box says no more than three days every day. No medication. Says give it a good 45 year run before. So guys, if you buy Rin, use cautiously. You will get addicted. Thank you for coming to my TED talk. What did the dare officer say? Say no. Say no to drugs. Say no to drugs. I don't know if that's what it was. I didn't The dare people, people Did you people see something? Say something? No. Wait, that's terrorism. I don't know. In an airport. I mean, they're both terrible. See something, say something su. Anyway, we literally have not even gotten to our topic yet. And it's a calling episode, so I'm gonna put this down. It's not a typical me episode. It's no, it's no sadness. No. No one gets lost and never seen again. No one dies. Wow. I'm, I'm actually shocked. No one's missing. Yeah, it's boring if you ask me. Oh, that's sarcasm. What's the top? Wait, what's the category? Before you tell me the topic, it has to do with something that we were literally talking about and singing earlier. That's why I said, oh, I'm so glad you said that. Mm-hmm. Oh, really quick before we get into the topic, but you know how I've been obsessed with chat GBT lately? Yes. Like next level obsessed. I saw a trend that was like, please tell me on TikTok, obviously the most unhinged things you've used, chat GBT for Like not talking like gimme like fix my resume, or like gimme a good dinner idea. Like what is the most unhinged shit you've seen or asked? Chappy chat, GBT. People are actually insane. I'm like, screenshotting great ideas, great fucking ideas. Never would've thought of that ever. Okay, first one. Discount codes. Every single time I place an online order, I actually did hear that one, A plus plus. There's also a couple that were like, I'm like, are you okay? When there's long terms and conditions on something, copy and pasting in it in, and she'll tell you what might actually cause you a problem in the future. In fucking incredible. In fucking incredible. Someone wrote, I had her summarize the bible for me. Alrighty. Crazy. Record an argument with my ex and played his Chacha chat J pt, and asked if I was being manipulated and was given an entire analysis on every gaslighting and manipulation technique he used. I've seen a lot of that. That's cool. I've seen a lot of That's crazy. Like, you don't need a therapist anymore. Don't need, don't even talk to anybody. Just joke. Just No. You still need a therapist. Do not listen to her. No, you don't. What I mean, it's a joke. Yeah. Use it for a good comeback, especially when you're fighting with someone via text. A good, fair. Someone got a full tarot card reading via God and it was on point apparently. See, this is so scary. I'm just like, all of our jobs are gonna be obsolete. Well, I don't Fine. No, Chloe literally fine. I'll start Ubering. I don't care. I don't want a job. I don't want work anymore. I went about tire. Same girl. Same, oh, I asked, I asked her to create a Love Island episode with a bunch of people I know. And it was drama on drama on drama. I had$69 in my bank account and she made me a grocery list that costed$68 I've seen. I put in everything that I have in, in the fridge. It made me a meal in the fridge. Yeah. So I was just like, I have X, Y, and Z and it just popped out like different male options. That's so smart. That's actually on my list. I sent my DNA to ancestry and when I got my results, I showed Chad GBT and asked what my health risks are and what supplements I should take for my specific DNA. Perfect, like that's who needs doctors. So smart. Also, a joke sent to pick up myself and asked if I was skinny and no notes. Snowball, a hundred percent Chachi. PT is a girl's girl would've been like, so light. Speaking of, I was telling Chachi PT about my actual relationship with my man and she actually said, girl, you need to leave that man and move on. He's wasting your time for no reason. I've been like a girl's girl. I love it. That's why I put she for every single one, like she, hundred percent. It's a she. It's definitely a she. It's a she. Anyways, onto the topic of the day, Today we're talking about. Good Golly. Miss Dolly, Dolly Parton. Shut the fuck up. Yeah, you, that's why we were talking about it earlier. That's why I said, oh great. I'm glad you feel this way about her when you did Dolly. Yeah. Miss Dolly. Oh, I'm so happy it's not that long, because she's perfect. It was. Well, yeah, but also it was supposed to be at the end of last week's, but we didn't shut the fuck up last week, so Yeah. Miss Dolly working. Nah, I'm too fast. Oh my God. I'm so f this is like top five human beings for me. Of all, she's a batty. Yeah. Yep. Please continue. She is a bad. Oh, okay. Oh wait. Yeah, let's cheers. Actually. Cheers. Cheers to Miss Doy. God, I think I need to go put my teeth in. Okay. I have to pee actually, so our queen, miss Dolly, Dolly, Rebecca Parton, actually, she was born on January 19th, 1946. Oh, how does she look? I like 1946. Incredible. Like so close to a hundred. I mean, yeah. It's nearly 20 years. Like that's fucking crazy. She was born in a one room cabin on the banks of Little Pigeon River in Pitman Center, Tennessee. It's giving lifetime movie. It's given where the crowd does sing. Legit. No, that's more you. That's true. That's true. You're right. This is giving middle of nowhere. Think it's old spooky mountains. Yeah. Cool. Yeah. Dorothy? Yes. Yeah. Yeah. She is the fourth of 12 children. Fourth her parents are named Abby Lee. Caroline Robert Lee Parton senior, and I just need to tell you her siblings names because like is it giving Matt Damon in Goodwill Hunting except of, of the south? No, it's giving, it's giving wholesome. Oh, lovely. Willow Dean Will, Dean one full name will Dean naturally. David Wilburn, COI Denver. Ro Bobby Lee. Stella ma ca. You love that name. I'm so cute. Cassie Nan Randall. Huston, Larry, Gerald and twins. Floyd and Frida. Get the fuck outta here. And Rachel. Dolly. And Rachel like so fucking cute. Dolly's dad was known as Lee and he worked in the mountains of east Tennessee, the Spokey mountains like we talked about. He was a sharecropper. And then he had his own, like tobacco farm. He was slaying. Yeah. He's slaving the day away. Yeah. As most people of the time did. Yeah. Like what the fuck else was going on in the forties? What are we doing? What are we doing for work? What are we selling? What are we doing? He also worked side construction jobs because the Partons were Broy. Broy broke. Broke. Oh. Real big, big old bro. One cabin, 12 kids. Yeah. One bedroom cabin 12 children. Yeah. That's fair. It's given in East Tennessee. East Tennessee. Old Smokey. So Broy to the point where Dolly's father paid their doctor with a sack of corn meal for delivering her listen. I take it, I'll take it. I'll take whatever you give me. Who am I? Yeah. One man's trash, another man's trash drop. He was chef's Kiss. He was fully illiterate. Oh, okay. But Dolly always said he was the smartest, most hardworking man she's ever known. Like, okay, my type, that's my type. Illiterate, hardworking, say less. Mm-hmm. Dolly's mothers slid away at home for the kids.'cause like she had a small army. Someone's gotta watch them. Yeah. Even that's a whole basketball team. More than a basketball team. You only need like five. That's a baseball field, a backup pitcher, and a closer. It's too many. It's much too many. She only'cause she had a set of twins. So she had 11 pregnancies. And she had all 11 pregnancies. Within 20 years. Yeah. In 20 years. Yeah.'cause she was a mother by 12. Which is crazy. Oh yeah. So the age gap was, she had all her children by 35. She had 12 children at three, five. Imagine babies having babies. Imagine you having 12 children right now. No, I can't imagine 12 children in one room, let alone that I fucking gave birth to them. Imagine 12 of them in this room. Colleen. Just 12 Bridget. I understand. Okay. That's all. And I'm upset. I'm disheveled. I'm, I am. What's the word I'm looking for? I'm, it's a word your mother would use. Do you know what I mean? No, that does not narrow it down. The vocab is large. Nevermind. You got where I was going with that? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Insert large word. Yeah. And this is also the woman's POIs giving birth in the forties. No, she's ripped tush to Bush 12 times. 12 to 11. Yeah. Yep. Do your chain hang low. Those lips are hanging low. There's no way she stitched. No. Imagine the postpartum depression. Like what did they stitch with? Floss, I imagine? No, no. They even have floss in the forties. We have been over this, have cars. I don't know. I'm confused. You know, I get really confused about time, Bridget. Did they have electricity? Like, I dunno. Colleen, stop. I'm being serious now. You're being fucking crazy. I know something, a light bulb was invented like probably in like the 18 hundreds, but that was like the early 19 hundreds too, right? Benjamin Franklin? Or was he the key? The key with the the airplane paper airplane. Just using buzzwords right now. Thomas Jefferson, he's on the dollar. What's your name? Tom is Jefferson. Nobody tell her. She has to learn anyways, but enough about her psis Jolly considers all of her musical abilities. Her talent, her interest is because of her mom. Because her mom literally had to entertain all of her entire army of children with singing like Smoky Mountain folklore in like little jigs and shit because like little jigs there was a shoulder. It's giving, like coming down the mountain. Here she comes like, I don't know. She'll be coming around. Yeah, like shit like that. Because what, what else do you do when you have$0, 12 children? You live in, it's the forties and they live in the middle of nowhere in a cabin. You're getting shit house. You are getting drunk. Like, what else you gonna do? You're gonna jig and you're sing. Yeah. And you're gonna listen to some music. Your parents are gonna get blackout because they cannot believe that this is the hell that they're in 12 voices, and you guys are gonna learn how to line and dance. I have enough voices in my head. I don't need 12 more in front of me talking to me. Imagine 12 different people going, mom, mom, mom. I'd say Go lay down. You would back in the day, you wouldn't do this now because you're, you would, you would do draw the line some places. You would be like the speak for yourself alcohol and the gums. Like when they put like the whiskey on the gum. Yeah. Give me a, a needle in a bourbon right arm. You did, my god. Frank Gallagher did it in Shameless. Exactly, exactly. Oh yeah. If they're yelling too much. Little, all right. All right. Let's. Easy does it? Off to bed. You go. Little Benadryl. Oh my fucking God. Kelly. Little Z quilts. Okay. Good night. Little vape pen. Little Benjamin while you go. It's raspberry flavored. Don't worry. It's like your favorite Popsicle. It has electrolytes. Somebody help us anyways, they move out of the cabin. Oh, okay. When she was still a youngin, they moved from Pittman Center to another farm. Please tell me it's an upgrade, please. It is a little bit of an upgrade. It's a farm. It's near Locust Ridge. That means nothing to me. Just know it's kind of close. It's just a. A new vibe, new scenery? Not far. It's a hop, skip and jump. Okay, cool. Cool, cool, cool. Most of her chair, this is important because most of her cherished memories from youth writes a lot of songs about them. It's always brought up as this cabin on the Locust Ridge cabin to the point, like she was obsessed with it so much that when they did sell it, like later on, doesn't matter, she does buy it back and she revamps the whole thing. Oh, there's a replica of it at Dollywood. Yeah. Yeah. Like she's obsessed. This is like it for her. This is all of her. Yeah. Her childhood memories. She would be nothing without the cabin on the farm on Lo Ridge, Arlington. Oh, so nice. We'll get into Dollywood later. That's not important. Also, the area that they moved to was very Pentecostal, so she was brought up in the Church of God and that also had a huge influence on her. Like she was popping her bussy at church. She was to What songs do you think? I don't know. Come on, pick one, because I don't know what Pentecostal it means. Yeah, but pick one. I do. See, that's the thing. They come to me at times. I don't want them. What about the My Lord? Bye. There's a better form of weight in the sky, Lord in the sky. But honestly, that's actually from Cheaper by the Dozen. That's not a church song I've ever heard. That's the most calling thing I've ever seen done. I can't just, you regurgitated the one of the 10 only movies you rewatch. That was excellently done. Well, whatever. But that's what she was popping her bussy to. Okay. No. So her mom's performing jigs and her popping bussy at church made Dolly who she is. That makes complete sense. She loves music. She starts performing as a child, obviously. She sings on local radio shows, television programs, all across East Tennessee. And by 10 she was on the show. It was called the Cas Walker Show. It was like a local like a wicked old radio show, only in Knoxville. It was giving like Maddie in the morning, but only for the Smoky Mountain area. Okay. Okay. Fair? Yeah. Think fair. So she's out there, she's age 12, like Lynn and shit. By 13, she records a song called Puppy Love on a, a small Louisiana label. Oh my God. Not the Elvis one. No, it's Donnie Osmond as a kid. It's my, one of my mother's favorite songs of all time. Oh, I definitely would know it. And he's a baby when he sings it. Maybe it's a different, maybe it's maybe Nick, maybe she, I don't know. So she's more of a writer actually. We'll get into it. Wow. Yeah, we'll get into it. And it's on a really small Louisiana label, so that's like her first, her first, it's called like gold band records. Doesn't Matter. And this got her on the map like a little bit.'cause she, one, she's 13 and like two like iconic. And so then because of this, she goes and she appears at the Grand Ole Opry for the first time and she meets Johnny Cash. Holy shit. And he tells her follow your instincts regarding her career and her singing. And she's like, fuck, okay, I'm 13 and I'm gonna listen to Johnny Cash. So here I go. Wow. She graduates from, I dunno how to pronounce it, Xavier County High School in 1964. I'm assuming it's probably the only fucking high school in that area. So just, oh, for sure. I don't have to explain that. The next day she moves to Nashville. Fuck yes, girlfriend. She says, see ya. Bye. Something I didn't know about her is that she was actually, like I said, a songwriter at first. That's really what got her popping off before she was even a singer herself. So she arrives in Tennessee. She immediately signs with Combine publishing with her frequent songwriting partner, which is her very own Uncle Bill, uncle Boo. So Uncle Bill's like popping off a songwriter. So she teams up with him and like that really helps her a bunch. Okay, cool. With him, she wrote several singles including a bunch of hits for this guy Bill Phillips. He is think the Tim McGraw of that time. Okay, cool. So he was like, great comparison. So this is crazy. Yeah. And she wrote a bunch of other songs too, including one for Hank Williams, Jr. Wow. Yeah. Pop off. So she's pumping out hits. She's not singing, she's pumping'em out Right now she is 17, 18. Wow. She has composed in total probably over 3000 songs, including. I'll always love you. I mean, the Whitney Houston. It is, it's one of the greatest songs created of all time. And that's her and I would die on that motherfucking hill. Yeah. And that was Dolly and Dolly we fucking trust. So yeah. Put her ass on the dollar bill. How about that? I know they got the, they got the wrong bitch. They get the wrong bitches on the, the, the money. Sorry. Mother needs a sip. Mother needs a sip. Mother needs a patch. Moving forward. It's now 1965. This would make her 19. She signs with Monument records. Doesn't matter. And she was pitched to them as obviously she's little. She's blonde, she's cute. She's a, a bubblegum pop singer.'cause that's what. Every label wants, right? They, that's what makes them money. She releases a string of singles, but only one chart. It's called like Happy, happy Birthday, baby. Something fucking so stupid. It didn't even crack the top a hundred. She goes to the label and she's like, I really wanna record country material. That's what I know. It's where I'm from. Like, it's a whole thing. And they're like, no, you have such a unique high voice, like a soprano. Soprano. What the fuck ever? And they're like, it's not suited to country. Like, that's not you. You need to be more a poppy. And she's like, okay. What the fuck? So her songs that she's writing are obviously popping off for that guy, bill Phillips. Mm-hmm. So the label says, okay, fine. Like if you can write that shit, I'll allow you, I'll allow you to record some country. So she comes out with her first country single and it's called Dumb Blonde, and it reached number 24 on the country chart. And then next year she writes something fishy and she does she records something fishy and it goes to number 17. So those first two songs are really what put her on the map, right? And they're on her first album. And her first album is called, hello, I'm Dolly. Oh, I just love her love. And that's when Dolly is born. That's it. I just want a wall that's like a picture of Dolly. I'm trying to think of like the five women who made the biggest impact. Oprah. RuPaul, obviously Patti Lone. I mean, I'm a Viola Davis. I have no, I have no say in this. Do you know what I mean? Yeah. Like I want like a wall of the most iconic women of all time. Like, get Harriet Tubs up there. Come on. What are we doing here? I is not expecting you to hit me with the Harriet Tubs. Who wouldn't hit you with the Harriet Tubs? She'd hit you with the Harriet tubs with the fucking shotgun she had on her. Oh my God. I can't, so her album slaps, it hits her first one. Dolly is legit born like this is Dolly. Okay? Mm-hmm. Sidebar personal update. She's so little. I know. She's 1966 now, so she's 20. Oh my God. And on May 30th, 1966, Dolly and Carl Thomas Jean, they get married in Georgia and he was just an average Joe. Like literally not nothing about him. He stayed completely outta the public eye. He did not accompany her to any public events'cause that's the way he liked it. And according to her, he only saw her perform in person one time. Wow. Yep. He ran an asphalt company a driveway paving business out of Nashville. That is what he did for a living. Like truly an average Joe. Yeah. But just like obsessed with her behind the scenes. Wow. Although obviously Dolly doesn't use his name professionally'cause they're married, she does state that her passport says Dolly Parton Dean and she uses the, the dean name when she signs like contracts and shit. Yeah. Yeah. No matter what anyone else ever said about him, like thought it was kind of weird. Like she absolutely adored him. She would talk about him whenever she could. She commented on his romantic side and said that he always did spontaneous things behind the scene to surprise her. Oh, he even wrote poems for her. Oh yeah. He actually just died this past March. I know. That's why I am eyeing off the rip. You couldn't tell by my past tense. He was. Yeah. No, but just like they've been together so long, so fucking long. Their entire lives. She's been married to him. How do you just proceed? Like you just don't? I don't know. I don't know. Genuinely off the rip man. Anyways, back to Dolly being a batty. She writes music, right? She also performs and she can't read sheet music, actually. But do you know how many instruments she can play? Oh God. How many she can play. Dulcimer. No idea what the fuck that is in auto harp Probably. Sure. In a harp that moves automatic. I don't fucking know. Yeah, great. It's giving piano but a harp. Sure. Does that make sense? Sure. I dunno. I could be completely wrong. I'm just totally making that up. A banjo, a guitar, an electric guitar, a fiddle. If you play fiddle, like fiddle, people are like kind of sleigh like, oh, it's crazy, crazy cool. Piano, a recorder and the saxophone because duh, duh. All of those things she can play. She also has been known, her best instrument is her fingernails. Excuse me. So that's how she got the beat to the song. Nine to five is her fingernails. She beat them from clacking her nails together while she was backstage on the set of the film. Nine to five. Get the fuck outta here. Yeah. They're her nails. They're her nails, they're her nails, her God nails. Wow. Oh, so she's just a savant. Like that's not, that's, you know, that's not someone who knows one language or three. That's someone who knows like 12, you know, she's like, I can't read sheet music, but like I can play 10 other things, including use my fingernails to compose music. Has, she has an ear that's someone who's just like born with a gift. Yeah, she's a baddie. Yeah. Back to her timeline though. Yeah. Now it's 1967. Okay. And she meets musician and country music guy. This guy Porter Wagger. Nothing you really need to know about him, but he really brought Dolly into the spotlight. Obviously she had her album and she hit like the top 100, but like he brought her out. Yeah. Made her more like of a sensation nationally, worldwide, whatever. He invited Dolly to join his organization and he offered her a regular spot on his weekly show. He had a show called the Porter Wagoner Show. It's like a road show. It's giving country corny Collins. Wow. Lots of wonderful analogies that, because I had to look them up because I'm like, I just like need, like, is this a relevant name or not? What a wonderful reference you just made. Thank you. Also, they're all from like Wikipedia. It's not, I didn't watch anything. Yeah, no, I know. It's not important. So our country, corny Collins guy, she's like paired up with him and he convinces his label, it's called RCA Victor, not important, but convinces his label to sign her. He's like, you gotta bring her on. And they decide to, the label decides to protect their investment by releasing her first single with them as a duet with him rather than be a solo. So now they're, they're a duo act. They do have a lot of successful duets. Like a string of them. So they do well together. They're named Vocal Group of the Year in 1968 by the CMAs. But Dolly's solo records were like continuously ignored because they were such a good duo. Mm-hmm. So she wants to be a solo batty, obviously. Yeah. Let her fly. Let your flag clip fly her wings. Yeah. So he's doing, he's helping her, but also hurting her at the same time. Yeah, of course. Holding her back. Then comes Jolene. Mm. Oh my God. It's late 1973 now. I mean, Beyonce's doing it now. Like truly the song that has outlasted, she just keeps popping'em. Yeah, just keep popping it. It's been like a couple. Oh, so it's 1973. It's been a couple years that she's been with Mans. And when she. When Jolene comes out right. It pops off the charts immediately. She doesn't even have to do anything. So now she's envisioned the solo career. So she makes the final decision now that Jolene's out to leave his organization. Right. So they performed for the last time in April of 1974. Wow. So they've been performing for probably like four or five years at this point. And then she completely stops appearing on a show in mid 1974 in, although they remain completely affiliated after like you don't know her without him kind of thing. Yeah, yeah. And so, to be honest, like from then on like 1975 to like 1986 ish, she's just popping off like hit after hit Just living life. There's nothing really like notable that crazy, that like. Happens in her personal life or her professional life, like nine to five comes out. Another other like long list of songs, she's just popping it. She didn't renew her contract with RCA Records, but she does sign with Columbia Records in 1987. So, and then from then on she's with that new record company and still same thing, just like Pump. She still has records coming out like as of like three years ago. So she's living. Another thing about Dolly, she's obviously known for having a considerable amount of plastic surgery. Mm-hmm. And she was on the Oprah and Ri, she was on Oprah obviously. Duh. Because as everyone goes on Oprah, right. And Oprah obviously asked her like, what kind of surgery have you gotten? And she replied that cosmetic surgery was imperative. And she has obviously made jokes about her physical image and her surgery. She's pretty honest about it. And she says it takes a lot of money to look at this cheap. I love her so much. When asked about future plastic surgeries, she famously said, if I see something sagging, bagging or dragging, I'll get it nipped, tucked or sucked as You should love that for you girl. You don't like it. You change it. Yeah. You pop off for real. Other random things I read about her that I did not know, which made me giggle were she said in 2012 that she had entered a Dolly Parton drag queen lookalike contest. Yes. And fucking lost. Yes, I did. I did. Of course. I knew that. Like, that's fucking hilarious. Yep. She always wears a wig. Always. I did not know that. Yeah. Yeah. Didn't know that. Yeah. She uses the name Aunt Granny when she travels under the radar. Oh, I didn't know that. That surprises me because it makes her like, to me, she's so young at heart. Yeah. Like I can't imagine her leaning into granny. Yeah, she's very glamor. Yeah. Very glamor. Very glamor. A hundred percent. I did know this because I was a Hannah Montana stand, obviously. Duh. Her godmother. That's her. Yeah, that's her God. She's Miley Cyrus's godmother. And she's on episodes of Hannah Montana. And I remember being like, why the fuck the fuck?'cause her and Billy Ray Cyrus were like boys. Yeah. Two other things I really didn't know about her. Obviously. I actually didn't know about Dolly World, like at all. Really, it's just like not on my radar. Mm-hmm. And also, like I knew that she was obviously like a good person, but I didn't realize like how philanthropic she was. My favorite thing about her. Yeah. Didn't know that. So I'll tell you guys, imagine just like being so cool or iconic enough to have a world, like a theme park named after you. No. Like what would be in Gie world do you think? White wine. White wine. Chicken on a stick. Just like a kebab. It could be, but also um, it could babe. It a babe. I would have like meat trucks, like one would be a chicken on a steak from Hong Kong and one would be beef on a stick from another Chinese soup place. And then there'd be like a taco truck and then there would be a Regina truck, you know what I mean? And then there would be a drag show every single day bottomless brunch where you get bottomless whatever drink that you can muster. And then there would be a parade. Okay. That's important to me. Would you be on the float? Oh, a hundred percent I'd be on the float. Okay, cool. Glitter falling once an hour every hour. Disco balls everywhere, just one part that's just completely blue for no other reason. Then there's just gl, no notes. Also, it's on a beach also. There's a pool. I don't make the rules. And then there's a big party from like four to seven, and then everybody goes home and that's what time it closes. And they play nineties r and b in hip hop. And then early two thousands jams. That was good. Right off the cut. Oh, and a potato bar, obviously. Duh. Where different potatoes with different dressings and toppings and ingredients. That's crazy that that just came off the top of the dome. No, that scared the shit outta me. I wasn't prepared for that. No, I didn't. No. That scared me a little bit. I won't lie, because of how long it went on for. I was like, wait, and, and I, and it continues. I mean, those were all my, I mean, some of my favorite things. Yeah. If I really took some time to think about what you would want that, I'd probably come up with that myself too. Yeah. But I would need time question mark. Yeah. So what would be in Colleen Wood? I don't know. There would be drunk SIGs. No. Yeah, you would. Coke. Coke. Upon admission, you would receive complimentary tequila, a chicken finger and a cigarette. Yeah. Diet coke dispensers. Everywhere. Everywhere. No water everywhere. Not a fucking water inside. Massive things of ice. Massive everything on ice. Like bottomless everything. Ice through haunted houses. No, no rides because I don't really like roller coasters, but lots, no spooky, scary. Lots of haunted houses. Salem, which trial themed public executions. Public ex executions for people we all voted on, right? Yeah. What else? You don't clearly know me better than I, I mean, definitely the chicken tenders. No shoes, no service. Oh, barefoot for barefoot for sure. No shoes. Service shoes. No service is what I meant to say. Fairy no scales. Country music is playing maybe a live country band at the end of the night. Oh, like a hoe down. Yeah. Big hoe down. We can stay up late though. Yes. We can say up later than I would like four tequila, like on the spout. So you could just like go up and like, yeah. Mm-hmm. Limes. Mm-hmm. Lots of limes. Limes everywhere. A vibe too needs to be aesthetically pleasing as well. All men have to be shirtless hot men only, union men only. Yes. Mm-hmm. With tool belts and with tool belts. And you can't get in unless approved by three friends or more. Ooh. Like Raya kind of. Yeah. Kind of like Raya. You just need to be like Yeah. Vetted first. Correct. I keep asking mans to just like, put'em on toilet belt, a toilet belt, a tool belt for me, and he just like, doesn't understand why, and I'm like, just play along with it. Do you, is it a, a sex role play thing or do you mean in general? So you can picture it later? Not like a role play thing. Like that's weird. Like I don't need you to pre-plan it and like do that, but like, but if you just happen to have one laying around, your sink is broken. If you happen to come home from work it, the visual would be nice. Like, don't shower. Okay. Like that's fine. Oh, and put on a tool belt. Say less. Okay. Those are my thoughts, but he's just like that for you. I'm confused about that. And I'm like, just don't be, just shut the fuck up. He's like, are you sure? Haven't been more sure about anything in my life. Thank you. That's fair. That's fair. This is my DST daydream. Anyhow, that would be my perfect world, I would say. Cool. Free admission, of course. Yeah. Duh. But to answer your question, like, you know, you probably all say what. Blow a bar in your, sorry, sorry. Blow up bar. Blow out your hair anyway. Oh, that's good. Blow bar with a shoe store. But sorry. Keep going. Keep goings, keep going of shoes. We'll, we'll keep, we'll keep going off but if you think of anything else, lemme know. Okay, great. Because I kind of like this vision that we have lots of pink as well. Yeah, obviously. Dolly world, you're probably like the Fook for those of you that dunno at least. So it's actually a string of things that she put in her hometown in attempts to like get it, pop in, give back to the people, get some, get some flow, money flow through where she grew up.'cause it obviously. She broy, she was a broy. Everyone else is Broy in the town. So she's a co-owner of the Dollywood company, which operates the theme park Dollywood. Mm-hmm. A dinner theater, Dolly Parton stampede, the water park, Dolly's Splash Country, and the dream more resort and spot where we would be probably. And all of that is in Pigeon Forge, where she lives. Dollywood is actually the 24th most popular theme park in the us. Oh my God. Like that's cr I literally was not on my radar at all. Like, I'm thinking like, no, I thought it was like, how Elvis, what's Elvis's? Place called, you know what I'm talking about? Yeah. You guys know what I'm talking about? Yeah. I thought it was like that. I didn't realize it was like Graceland. Oh my. I thought, God, it was like an attraction of some sort. I didn't know it opened in 1961. It has a shit ton of attractions. Like it's Disney World of the South. She actually has never been on one ride. Of course not her kid. I imagine being that iconic, that one you have a theme, five you've ever been on the, and you don't need to be on the rides. I think she was on the float like one time at the anniversary. Like, okay. No, I, I have actually seen a bunch of videos of her on the float. Okay, good, good, good. Yeah. I thought I saw it was like, oh, she's, she's appeared and it's like, oh, is this her first time? No, no, no, no. She goes, I would be like, no, I, I run at 12 o'clock, six o'clock, 10 o'clock on the dot. Yeah. Every day. Come on. No days off. Yeah. Applaud me. Thank you. So that's Dollywood, but also I didn't know, like I said, how philanthropic she was. She, her creating Dollywood in general was obviously her giving back, and then she started the Dollywood Foundation in 1988 and it started originally as like a way to improve. Education and like success for any children within the county that she grew up in. And like, whether that be like scholarships, she gave a ton of money and scholarships out to everybody in their high schools. Like a buddy program, which peer like paired a bunch of middle schools with like a buddy to help'em graduate because a lot of people didn't graduate where she was from. And then she created the Imagination Library. And that was in like the late nineties. Mm-hmm. It was a program for that mails free books to children from birth to age five, regardless of income. Everybody gets one. It's since then it's distributed over like 300 million books, 3 million children worldwide. Wow. It's not just in the us it goes to Canada, it goes to uk, Ireland, Australia. It extends everywhere. It just is something that she's passionate about. So she did something about it and like, not a lot of people do that these days. So that is a sleigh. Amazing. Which is also big into giving into healthcare. Obviously the pandemic hit and she gave a million just like right off the top of her hat to Vanderbilt for research on how to get rid of it. And I also read that. During both the Trump, I think both anyways, the past three presidencies. We'll say that she turned down the Presidential Medal of Freedom three separate times. Mm-hmm. Because her husband was sick. And also like there was a whole as pandemic and she was kind of just like, really, like, love you all, but like right now, that's what you wanna do. Bad timing, do something else. Read the room. And in 2021, the Tennessee legislature, I can never say that word. Legislature wanted to create a statue of her. I forget where. And she, they proposed to do this and she releases a statement, is basically like, remove the bill from consideration. Like, please be fucking for real. And she says, given all that's going on in the world, I don't think putting me on a pedestal is appropriate at this time. Oh, a humble Queen Li Bridget. Humble Queen. Is that what you have, Brandon? Humble, fucking queen. God, I love her. Yep. And then in 1998, Nashville Business ranked her the wealthiest country music star. And as of 2018 her net worth was 500 million. And it's definitely way more now. Holy shit. Yeah. She obviously gets a shit ton of awards. Like, hello? She's been killing it for like how many years now? Yeah. Some notable are like 190 awards, 384 nominations, whether that be Grammys academy of Country Music Awards, CMAs, American Music Awards, CMT Academy Awards. Like she has had all of it. And she's still a baddie. She's still coming out with shit. She's still living and she's still thriving. And that is our baddie Dolly Parton. I am obsessed with her. She's donated so many books to children at this point. It could feel like multiple libraries on and on and on end. No, is just on it. It's giving the library from Kutar. Yes. Yes. She just is so generous with her time and her money and no one's like that anymore. And, and she's a badass woman. Like she's not, she was so ahead of her time. Oh God, I just love her. She's a Maddy. And that's all I got for today. Wow. I'm so glad you did, Dolly. Anything from the Dole trolley? No, no. I just had to say it. I was gonna say, oh my God. Whitney Houston singing that song. Whitney Houston Really singing anything but two specific things was, and I'll always love you in the national anthem at the Super Bowl, no notes, All right, everybody, have a wonderful week. Pop your bussy to church music. Watch some fucked up documentaries and tell us about it. Work your nine to five and be like, Dolly. Be like, Dolly. Love you mean love you mean goodbye, Dolly. Do.

Speaker 9: 1:22:39

podcast was produced by me, Bridget Shannon. Music is written and performed by Matt Derosiers. You can find his band, Super Stoker, anywhere you listen to music.