That's Hot

On this week’s episode, Colleen spends the week sweating up and down the East Coast while Bridget heads to Nashville for a wedding weekend filled with live music, line dancing, and a steak knife. Along the way, we discuss beard maintenance, Knicks fans and Amanda Batula being the worst.

Then Bridget tells the story of PARIS HILTON and PROVO CANYON "SCHOOL". We dive into her childhood, her rise to fame, The Simple Life, the leaked sex tape, and the abuse she endured at PCS. Behind the "That's Hot" persona was a much more complicated story, and one that ultimately led her to become an advocate for survivors of the troubled teen industry. Spoiler alert: Paris is a baddie. We hope you all find peace and don't let the weather app lie to you!!

Sources:

• This is Paris - Documentary YouTube
• Trapped in Treatment Podcast - Season 1
• ChatGPT

Review and subscribe! You can find us on Instagram @Sippinwiththeshannons or send us your stories at Sippinwiththeshannons@gmail.com. Love you, mean it.

Transcript

0:02

Pour me a glass of rosé or make it a chardonnay. Come on and sip it with the Shannons. Or if it's Riesling or Pinot Grigio, you know we're sipping with the Shannons. Whoa. I was just a five when I was five. Rain came, spin your eye. And when I, and the bitch is back. Bitch... You know what I'm saying? You know what I'm saying? No. I have no idea what you're saying. It's The Bitch is Back, Elton John. It's not a recurrence. He was off campus. Yes, of course. When the bitch gets back, oh. Dun, dun, a. I'm a bitch and a bitch and the bitch is back. Stone cold sober as a matter of fact. I'm a bitch, I can be, 'cause I'm better than you. It's the way that I move, whoa. Love Elton. Love Elton. I'm just gonna keep cutting you off every time you spoke with a whoa. No, I would stab you. Whoa. Colleen? Yes? Yes, oh. My lawyer will be reaching out- with a cease and desist. How you doing? Oh my God, the pollen is pollinating. Crevices are sweating that probably shouldn't be sweating at this moment. I will not tell a lie. I cannot tell a lie. Oh my God, you have lost the plot today. I tell you something, my zoomies have been so bad lately. She just told me a story and did not breathe for 15 minutes. Thank God I did not. Did not take a single breath. My fa- like, my face is warm. It was really like- What do you need? What can I get you? Nothing. Nothing on me. Tell me about you. I am doing so well, to the point where when I said it like that to my therapist the other day, she said, "Are you being facetious?" That's- She was like, "Oh, sarcasm?" Fair question. I was like, "No." I genuinely mean... 'Cause I'm usually like, "I'm fine. I'm okay." Everything's fine. Yeah, I'm okay. You know what I've been saying to people at work lately? How are you?" You know when they say, "How are you?" Like, professionally. I just, "I'm alive." Colleen, we, we gotta- When they say, "That's really great," and I said, "Yeah, it is. Yeah, it is." "Yeah, it is, Joe." L-I-V-I-E. We did it, Joe. Oh, I'll be out here. Well, welcome to this week's episode of Sipping With the Shannons. We're cousins, and every other week we sit down, we sip on some wine, we talk some shit, and we have a good giggle. I'm Bridget Shannon. I don't know why I just wanted to go say, "I'm Bridget Shannon." I'm Colleen Shannon. And you made some skinny marks tonight. Skinny marks. Skinny marks. Skinny marks, skinny marks. What have you been up to? Tell us everything. Your girl's been worldwide. To Florida. She's been to Florida. I went to New York, too. Worldwide. East, across the east. From top to bottom. From top to bottom, from bush to tush. From bush to tush along the coast. I did bush to tush on the East Coast. You coasted, yeah. Yeah, I did. Good for you. When do you think my beard will go away? Your beard? Do you think you can get laser on your beard? Yeah, definitely. 'Cause I'm over it. Yeah, you can get it lasered. It will not go away. It will get worse. So I, I won't laser it. No, you need to laser it. Oh, I thought you meant if you did them- Because if you- but that doesn't help me no, no, no, if you don't. Y- as you age, the hair on your face does get worse. Can we start a GoFundMe for my beard? Definitely. Because I'm, I can't afford things like that, and I just can't be plucking no more. It ain't right. I see the looks I get when I'm in traffic. Well, stop doing that then. I have to. It's the natural light. It's a game changer, or else I'll miss a few little stubborn ones. I saw a TikTok that was this girl, and she's like, "I know you think I'm putting my fingers on my chin." You're like, she's wiggling one back- A deep thought and she's like, "You think I have a deep in thought, and it's just one stray chin hair that I forgot, and I need you to know that." No, yeah. I stand with you. I- We ride or die my sister in Christ. Beardy girls for life. Brother in blood. I have both a bush and a- in two places. Mine, this one's a- Not a chin bush this one's just a small shrub. Not, not the chin shrub. It's not even on my chin. It's, like, on my neck, and I'm like, "What the, what the fuck is that?" Instead of a chin strap, you have a chin shrub. Whatever. I'm Mrs. Worldwide- with my bush and shrub. Again, you just went down the East Coast. Hey. Hey. Yeah, you. Um, I went to New York. It was hot as fuck. And- I was- you went for one reason No, listen. Listen, people. I dragged my chubby little ass, okay? First of all, I was being, uh- A good girlfriend n- yeah. I mean, I would wanna go anyways, but you know what? I was be- I didn't take work off, because I was like, "I'm new to this job. I'm gonna be nice, and I'm not gonna take work off. I don't feel right." Right. And so I drove my ass to Manhattan at 3 o'clock in the afternoon. Took me five and a half hours. I was doing a full beat in traffic, like, past the Times Square. Picture me navigating, being like, "Excuse me. Pardon me," trying to get to my- With mascara fucking garage. Doing my mascara, full beat, in the vehicle. Yeah, it was crazy. I actually got really drunk the first night, because I was like, "I just need peace for five seconds." We s- me and John stayed with his friend. Poor guy. And I guess earlier in the day he had said, "Do you think Colleen's gonna care, like, if I snore?" And he was like, "Dude, please. Between the two of us, we will outshine your snoring." We are, like, yodeling in our sleep constantly. But so nice of him to be so thoughtful. He had no idea he was sleeping with- No one could breathe a wildebeest Not, not a single person in that room could breathe. No. Everyone is gasping. I didn't hear him once, and I, I said to, we said to him in the morning, like, "Oh, do you have anything?" He goes, "Uh, I got up to pee around 6:00 in the morning. Real loud. Real, real loud." Everyone is sipping air from a straw. Oh, and I, and I s- s- while we're talking about sleeping, when I was in Florida, in the morning I woke up, my friends were like, "Something is not right with you." They heard you, like, fight for breath. No, no. I cannot stress this enough. Being next to you while you sleep is terrifying. It's my good snoring. That's- Well, you're like, "This is it." Like, I'm witnessing it. It's, I hold my breath, and then I'm like... No, it, Colleen, it genuinely sounds like someone is coming up for air from the depths of the ocean for 30 seconds, and then being pushed back down. And then yodeling No, they were like, "Something's not right." Yeah, something ain't right. And I was like, "Shut up, it's fine." You need a CPAP. I will never. I have J- you know what? I have John and I don't bother him because he's busy being like... I was gonna say, he's snoring too. I've talked about it on here before. Nothing disturbs me more than the way that he just closes his eyes and is immediately snoring. I'm like, "You're not asleep." I know. I know. You're not- I, I do it, too you're not asleep. That's how... Yes. Yes. No, but he'll g- no, but he'll lean over and pick up his phone and put it down, and put, put his head back down on the pillow. No, I'm asleep. Yes, I fall asleep. So it's, that is narcolepsy. So he must have the same version of, that I do, which is like- But he doesn't nap or anything. He's not a narcolepsy boy. Like, he takes a long time to fall asleep. No, no, no, no. It's like a spectrum- Okay. Thank you for educating us where... Yeah, so my version of narcolepsy, the one that I have, is I go into a full REM very quickly. So my friends, I have said to them, "My narcolepsy is kicking in. I'm going to be asleep in one minute." And they're like, "Yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay." And I put my head down and I am out cold. Like, "Bridget? Bridget?" Out cold. Got it So he must have the same version that I do. Bless him. Interesting. It's honestly a blessing. And a curse? Not really. Really? Unless you're drunk and you fall asleep in an airplane bathroom, then it's a curse. I, then I think, yeah, mm, I think that. But if you're a sober person- Whatever, the good outweighs the bad, I guess. Anywho. Yeah, whatever. Wah, I got too drunk. It was 95 fucking degrees the next morning. In US. But it was fine. We went to breakfast, not breakfast, but like I got a... First of all, grilled bagel, 12 out of 10. Oh. Forgot how good a grilled bagel was. Oh my God, especially in New York. And I love those fucking New Yorkers. What kind of bagel? Just plain. I just got plain. I was just- Did you get, you, what'd you put on it? It was at like a br- it was at like a weird breakfast place, so it wasn't like at a good place. You didn't get a bagel, egg, and cheese? No, I was very nervous. I was nervous. Why? Bridget, I don't know. It didn't feel good. Okay. And I wasn't ready for food. I was feeling gaggy. Oh, oh, oh, oh, from the hangover. So I just was like, let me just dabble with a bagel. That's my safe place. Got it. Also, love an, I love those fucking New Yorkers because they love to put the cream cheese on there. Oh, they slather. Load me up. No, I knew it. Slather. I wanna have to take it off, that's what I like. Yeah, I wanna have to scrape off with something. We're not scrimping for cream cheese around here. No. If I'm buying a bagel, you better load that fucking big boy up, let me tell you. Correct something about me. Cream cheese hates to see us coming. I would eat it with spam. It ain't cute. I always love the chopped- Uh, Philadelphia do you ever see the chopped- Yeah, of course cream cheeses that you get at Whole- Yeah, yeah, yeah. I always wanna make one with like bacon and pickles. I love an onion chive- That's a good one, too on top of a, of a bagel. The Trader Joe's one just with sourdough, slaps. Trust me. Just trust me. Okay, trust. Trust. Um, so we walked somewhere, so you know, we're like, "Oh, we'll barhop to our friend's location." Okay, m- it had to be an hour and a half walk in total. I think we realized, "Oh, that's a long walk. We should break it up and barhop." Sure, no problem. We start walking through Central Park. I'm fighting. I, I have never felt like I was gonna pass out in my entire life until that day. And I- Like from heat stroke? Y- yeah, it was like I couldn't stop sweating, and I had, I was like holding my hair up, and I like was like, like I- Oh, it's too bad 'cause that's a beautiful walk. I was, yeah, I know. I know. I was so mad, so then I was like, okay, I just need to- You're like, "Eloise" until we passed the plaza and I was like Gasping. I was so upset. So then I'm like, and I was like in a really like not jeans. They were like light white pants and a tube top and s- like sandals. Like I was not in like a, a warm outfit. I was dying. Until at one point my vision was like- Yeah, it was that fucking hot my vision was like going. Well, and also in the city, there's no breeze. Like it, there's no wind- No, and it's, it's just- to relieve you like laying out in the park in a t- in a bikini top. I'm like, I couldn't even sit down. We've been waiting for this weather for a very long time. I would be suffocating. Oh, yeah. Yeah. So I'm like saying nothing 'cause I'm awkward 'cause there's like a group of us, and John's, John knows 'cause he used to be like, "All right." I'm like, "Mm-mm, no, just stop talking to me." And we went to the first bar, and I was like, "Okay, it's cool there." Getting a little Aperol spritz situation. I threw up in the bathroom. Things are going okay. Okay. And then I'm like, "Okay, I feel a little better." And then you're like- Rebound "Okay, time to walk to the next bar." Passed away again. It was, I just, like, could not be outside. And we get to the bar that we're going to, and it's like a tiki bar, and it's like all frozen drinks, which would be great, but they're all, like, rum-based, whatever. I could not- Oh, no. No, no, no. For Jane, I... First of all, when you have to be on with people you don't know and you're actually on the verge of death is probably the worst thing I've ever experienced in my entire life. Okay. Well, that's a little dramatic, but I get it. Yes, when you have to, like, be ex- I get what you mean. I get- Introduce yourself. Yeah. And you are like, "I n- Fighting I need to just sit in silence for 10 seconds." Like, I c- I cannot. And I ordered, I somehow got John to order me a frozen marg. I was like, "I'm just gonna sit down here at the end of the table." There's, like, 15 people here, 10 of them I don't know. That's the vibe. Mm-hmm. Night- Mm-hmm. Right carpet's wet. Everything's wet. Everything's wet. Everything's wet. And they must've, I think they forgot or something, and I, somebody handed me a Blue Hawaiian, and I was like, "This is my nightmare." And so I plucked everybody's pineapple off of their drinks when they weren't looking and was, like, sucking on it. So, like, Bridget, I was dy- I've never felt that way, dying. And I just- Oh there was no relief, and it was ma- it was freaking me out more that, that I, and I knew the venue- Well, yeah, you're de- massively dehydrated and then I started over-thinking, and then I was like, "Oh my God, we have to go to a fucking Bro- Bronx game," uh- Red Sox Red Sox- Yankees Yankees game after this, and, like, I, there's no time for peace. I'm not gonna- There's no moment, and I'm like, "I have to just, like, figure it out," and it started to freak myself out, which is so dramatic, but, like, really I was, like, o- on death's doorstep. So I'm sucking people's pineapples, and then putting them in the drink after I'm done with them. Oh my God, Colleen. Someone drank the Blue Hawaiian later, and I was like, "There's at least six-" Colleen sucked carcasses. No. No, I know. Ugh. So after, like, an hour I was like, okay, it was fine. So then we get ready to go to the... We go back, we shower. I'm, like, feeling fine. We go- Did you drink a water? Yeah. No. Yeah, I did. I was j- I was genuinely drinking water. We- Okay, great we go back to the hotel. We change. And we go, we take the subway. I've never been on the subway before. I was kinda excited about it. There's no air down there. There's no fucking air down there. Oh, yeah. I- The smells we went all the way to the Bronx. I was really excited, though. Everyone said at the beginning, like, "What's everybody's goal for the night?" And I said, "I wanna see a rat. I wanna see a big, fat rat. That's what I want." Never saw one. But we- That's shocking I, I know, and I was trust me, I was looking. I was keeping my eyes peeled. Where are the dumpsters? I was so excited. And so we take this long-ass sweaty ride to the Bronx. It's beautiful weather, by the way, in Manhattan where we are, and we get off of the subway, train, whatever the fuck they call it there- Subway exactly the rain we just had, torrential downpouring, torent- torrential. Like, the- Must have felt kinda nice, though. Well, I didn't wanna... Yeah. Yeah, it was like the, it lightened the air a little bit. We're, like, underneath a bridge. That's where we come out, and so we run to, like, the bar that I guess everyone goes to before they go to the Yankees game. And it is a giant warehouse with club music with the lights on. And no, it was actually fabulous. I loved it. John and the- Okay John and the boys hated it. Me and the girlfriends fucking loved it. That sounds delightful. We had, we're having a grand old time, and as we get our first drink, they cancel the game. So not only are the men pissed that we're at this bar, they're now pissed that we are in the Bronx. And this is the annual trip. Yes. Like, going to this Red Sox, Yankee, Yankee game is why you go. Correct. Or why John goes, and now you and all the girlfriends are invited. Correct. Correct. So I'm like, I'm over the fact, I'm, like, not even mad that we don't have to go to the game. It was so fucking hot. I did not care. I was kinda down for a hot dog, though. So we're popping our pussies. I'm having a grand old time. You could tell the men wanted to leave. One of the friends of a friend's passes out. It was, like, a whole thing. Oh my God. She's fine. I don't know. I never- Jesus. Yeah, yeah, but it was just, like, a scene that was not necessary. And so we get back- She didn't do it on purpose, question mark? No. No. She didn't do it on purpose, but she, like, didn't eat that day, and, like, it was really hot, and, like, didn't drink water, so it's like, it's your own fault, question mark? But also, like, didn't, you obviously didn't want that to happen to you. Never seen a person fa- fall that hard on their face in my life, though. I was, like, horrified. I felt really bad. Oh my God she's fine. That's awful. She's fine. Okay. And then we took, we end up just getting on the fucking subway back, and then we just bar hopped a little bit. It was f- it was fine. It was, like, re- it was, I had a fun time, but, like, didn't need to go to New York for it is my point And who drove home? John drove home. I was not driving. Great. I'm not allowed to drive. I'm not allowed to drive. As the good Lord intended. Um- Uh, how was that ride home? It was very quick. It was like a three-hour drive. Oh, that- Imagine that. Ugh, no. I literally can't. Imagine that. It hasn't happened to me driving home from New York unless I leave super, super late, or, like, on a random shitty day. Yeah, that's probably- On a weekend. Yeah, flew right home. No notes. No notes there. And then I went to... Where did I go? Oh, I went to Florida. You guys. She was on a bachelorette in Florida. I was on a bachelorette in Florida. I went for a couple days. You were in Clearwater? I was in Clearwater. We did go out in St. Pete's quite a bit. Whoo. And so when we were on the boat, we did a booze cruise one day, and we went to go to Jimmy B's. Me, uh, we, we had a blast. Me and- Oh, love Jimmy B's so me and Erin were in separate cars, right? And I realized where we are, and I was like- Yeah, you're like- "Wait a minute" "This used to be the postcard inn." And so I said out loud, I was like, we were get- we, the marina, we were getting on the boat. And I said out loud, I was like, "You guys, this is really random, but if we need a place to go, I think I know a good, a good place down the street. Like, it's, um, called Jimmy B's." I, uh, I think it's called Jimmy B's, if I remember. Two seconds later, I looked down at my phone. Erin had texted to the bachelorette group a link to Jimmy B's website. And, um, everyone, Megan was like, "Oh, did you just say that to Erin?" I go, "No." I go, "That was so fucking weird." And so we ended up going out. We w- It's so fun. Yeah, we went to Jimmy B's. And when we were on the boat and we invited the, we invited the captain, our guy Frank, who we thought would be a creepy old 65-year-old man. He was actually, like, a 30-year-old that was really hot. It was crazy. Oh, God. We were kiking with him the whole time. Apparently, he owns all the boats that go in that little marina sandbar area, and he just k- He owns them? Yeah, he owns them all Huh. Yeah, but he has workers that run each one. Wow. Isn't that crazy? An entrepreneur. Yeah, an entrepreneur. He's from the, he's from the Keys in case you wanted to know. Cool guy. Got the Florida Keys. Um, but he's like, "Oh, have you ever been to PCI?" And I was like, "Have I been to PCI? It ain't there no more." The Postcard fucking Inn. Yeah, so we went through the Postcard Inn lore. Very upsetting. Um- What is there? What's happening? The Luce. The Luce. It just opened last week. It's very- Does it look the same? No, it's bougie and wicked expensive. Really? It's a damn shame. So then I was- What about that bar with all the, the things on it? The one behind it? In the back? Yeah. Yeah, that's gone too. It's all gone. Well- Well, I'm sure that, I'm sure the bar's probably there, but it's probably different. I didn't go look, but we just went to Jimmy B's, but- Oh, what a bummer you guys don't under- And I know, like I know, but it's so hot in Florida. I think you need to start carrying a personal fan. I think we've reached the point. It's so... But it wasn't just me. I was like, "Okay, I'm not, not gonna be the one this trip. This is not my trip. It's not about me." Right. "I'm not gonna complain one time." And then other people were like, "Like this is like, we can't be outside anymore." And I was like, "Thank you." You know what it was? It's because, um, like the pools and the water, the, like the bay water is bathwater. Yeah, it's hot. So there's no, like- Relief and we get in the pool, it's like there's none. There is none. Yeah, you're not- We also were on a lake where our Airbnb was- Mm-hmm and there was like kayaks, but there was- Yes alligators. Yes. Yes. So that was rude. A- I kind of wanted to swim with one, though. That would've been fun. Okay. Well- Um, yeah, I had a good time famous last words. Good time. Got, I got a little crispy, got a little flaky, got a little silly. Yeah, you are crispy. You are crispy. We had a murder mystery night. I helped with it. Yeah, how did The White Lotus night go? It was fun. It was funny 'cause like as we were doing it, I was like, "I actually have no idea what the fuck I'm saying or doing." And then someone would ask me a question and be like, "Well, what time is that at?" And I would just be like, "Shut the fuck up. Don't ask me." It's none of your goddamn business. I would say, "That's not-" How about that? relevance." Permission to treat the witness as hostile. More relevance on this, uh... Let me look at my notes to make sure I didn't miss anything. To talk about. Oh, my tire blowing up on the side of the highway. Oh my God, Colleen. I wasn't- This is not funny. But the thing is, it wasn't my fault. I know. I know, and it's, this entire thing is very Colleen. Tell- My- Tell the class my VP was visiting, and so we went to go visit somewhere in the South End. So on the way home- She was driving I was driving They did not take an Uber. No. Colleen was driving her boss. And I was like, "Oh, my, my car's here. It's fine." And well, she was like, "Should we just get transportation?" talking about, like, uh, one of our workers. Like, we have tr- we have vehicles. We have a fleet of vehicles. And, I was like, "No, it's all good." I don't know why. I was like, "Yeah, it's all good. My car's here." Like, it's okay. And so on the way back, we're literally... I can see my office, physically see my office. I'm go- I'm 10 and 2 going 30 miles an hour, and I just hear, we hear, like, a little and I'm like, "Well, that was weird," and I, I knew. I was looking at the road. I'm like, "I didn't hit anything." And all of a sudden, you just hear, like, ba-boom, ba-boom, ba-boom. I was like, "Oh," and my wheel started going one way, and I was like, "No." So I pulled all the way over. My VP's, like, in her tights and her, like, formal outfit. So I called my office- On the highway on the highway. This is on- Not great a very busy fucking highway. Yep, and I can see the office pretty much. So I called the office and said, "Someone needs to send transportation to pick up my VP because I simply can't deal with this." And so, so when the big Escalade pulls up, and they pick her up, and I'm like, "See ya, gotta go." So I called sweet Johnny Boy, and he, uh, came in, in the van, and, uh, he was like, "I can change it," but then the state trooper was like, "You, like, really can't change it here. It's, like, not safe." So I was like, "Okay, fine." Oh, yeah, you're just on a massive fucking highway. If it was, if the tire was on the, like, the passenger side, it would've been fine, but because it was on my side, it was, like, way too close to the street. So I r- rode on my rim for, like- Oh my God a mile and a half at three miles an hour with John behind me and a state trooper behind me, and we rode. She sent us a voice memo, and the entire time I just had my head in my hands of, like, "Ugh, Colleen. Colleen, it never ends." Ugh Well, that's what I did. What did you do? Wow, um, how to follow that act. I went to Cape Cod with Leanne for the weekend. It was absolute fucking perfection. Do not listen to the weather app. It's fucking lying to you. It told us it was gonna rain all weekend. I brought one bathing suit. I was like, "We're lucky if we get one beach day." We got three gorgeous 75 with a breeze, UV index at 7 at 1.8 beach day. That's a perfect beach day. It was so fucking incredible, and no one was there. All the bars and restaurants that's so hard to get into in Chatham, in Harwich, easy-peasy. No reservation needed, but still busy, so, like, when you went to a bar, you were still surrounded by people. It was a no man's land. There was just no wait. We went Thursday night, and so we got to spend all day Friday, Saturday, and Sunday there. Mm-hmm. That is the key. I mean, it still took us two plus hours to get there. But, like, to wake up in, I love that. I love waking up and being where I, I wanna be. Without having to travel there. Yeah, without having to think about the traffic or whatever. We just had one night where we got really dressed up and really cute, and bounced around and went to bars, and then, like, was still home at a good hour. We slept in, we got up early, we ordered in in our PJs. We did self-care. We na- like, I napped at one point. She has this window, it's like a bay window- I love bay windows and there's flowers around it, and the sun was shining through. And I napped in it like a cat. It was shining into where the couch is. Mm-hmm. And she was like, "You were snoring up a storm, having a wonderful time." And I was like, "I feel that deeply." What a good friend. We went to this beach at one point. We were able to wa- I, it was Bay Beach. We were able to walk to this sub shop and get drinks and subs, and I had an Italian sub on the beach- and a little glass of vino, and it just was perfect. Like, we didn't overdo it. We didn't underdo it. It ti- It was what dreams are made of it l- quite literally ticked every box. I will say, you will die, 'cause this is your nightmare. We show up to this restaurant, we get seated. Mm-hmm. And this waitress comes over. Everyone who works there is Gen Z. Nothing wrong with that. The moment they walked- we walked in, they were like, "Oh my God, you guys are so pretty. I love your out-" They were immediately complimenting us. I was like, "God bless." Leanne had the cutest jeans on I've ever seen in my life, and they could not get enough of it. It was great. So we get seated at our table, and the waitress comes up, and she's just like, "Yeah, so I'm a yapper, so I'm just gonna, like, chat with you guys, 'cause you seem really cool." Yeah. Which, like, totally fair, right? It never stopped. No, it's too much sometimes. It- You can make the joke, but you can't keep going. No, it... No, Colleen, it never stopped. At one point she was like, "Yeah, I live in Boston. It took me 45 minutes to get to work today." Respectfully, I know where she's from. I drove a similar route. Not on your best day would it take you 45 minutes, let alone a Saturday afternoon when it was gorgeous out. I- unless you go faster than the speed of light. Which, like, I'm not gonna correct her. I'm not gonna be like, "No, it wasn't." Yeah. So she's ki- she's going on and on and on, and then she says, "Well, also, I have 40 pounds of fluid in my body, and I'm really swollen." And she holds up her fingers, and they are full sausage fingers. And she was like, "And I went to the hospital, and nobody will tell me what's wrong. So do you guys, like, know what you want for drinks?" No, the... I was like- I, I was like... And she was like, "You know, I usually can tell if a table, like, wants to chat or if they don't." And neither of us responded. She was like, "And I can't really get a vibe yet if you guys, like, wanna chat or not." No. And we were just like- Like, normally yes, but no. But do you know what I mean? But you can't be like- Yeah "No, we don't wanna talk to you." And then like, it sucks- 'Cause that's fucking rude to be approachable. It really does. It, it is so annoying having resting nice face. Mm-hmm. It's so fucking annoying. I was like, "Please just let us gossip over-" We like to yap as well, but with each other. Yeah, with our cocktails and our fucking pizza. Like, please let us just be at peace. There's live music. We had a beautiful beach day. I don't wanna hear about your 40 pounds of fluid. Also, don't go to work if your body is about to explode. 40 pounds is a lot. It's so much. I'm... It's not funny. I hope this woman finds peace. I hope she finds out what's wrong with her. How old was she? Had to be, like, 24. Okay. A Gen Z-er. For sure Gen Z. Is that Gen Z? I don't know. Young. The entire staff was very young. But the food was amazing. The cocktails were great. She just could... Like, at one point I asked for a cosmo and they ran out of, like, the martini glasses, so she poured me an extra in a wine glass. She was like, "Do you care about gla- the type of glass it comes in?" I was like, "Girl, I would drink out of a fucking shoe." I don't- Like, if you saw me in college, you know I don't care about what glass it comes in. Would I prefer a martini glass? Of course, but I don't care. Most places, I like, I like do. That's, like, an experience. I just don't care, though. Okay, okay, okay. Like, yes, if I was gonna g- I would expect that, but if the answer is, "We're out right now," I'm not gonna be like, "Well, don't get me it then." Oh, yeah, no, I would never do that either, but- Exactly you know what's really upsetting is when you order a glass of wine and it's, like, a stumpy one. Hate the stumpy ones, and hate when they pour a quarter. Ma'am, I paid $14 for this. I know. I don't- It better be a high fucking tide you know where they have a good pour? Where do they have a good pour? And I didn't, I didn't think anything about it, and then I went on TikTok one day and it was like- Oh, the, the kid- "You'll be hearing from me." Yes. This is Long Cross. Oh, yeah. Oh, incredible. Yeah. I went with, uh, Mans's parents once, and- Oh, my God I was like, I hate to leave a drink that you paid for unfi- I will be shit-faced. Yes. And it was my second glass, and John's like, "Really?" They do not fuck around. And I don't leave wine unfinished, be so fucking for real, but it was, like, 2:00 in the afternoon and I hadn't eaten, and I was like, "I'm gonna be drunk." Like drunk drunk if you leave me any further. But it was like, and I remember when she poured it, I was like, "Oh, I have you pour." I went on TikTok one day and it was like, they will, th- he will be hearing from me, thank you for the long pours, something like that. Yes. And it was to, to the brim. Yeah. They don't fuck around. So- You have to lean over and sip from the top. Yeah. Yes. Yeah. That's a good pour. That's a good pour. So th- uh, outside of that, we had, like, the most beautiful Cape weekend, and then they, in Charlestown they had a walk for my Aunt Mimi and her best friend Michelle Gorman, who passed away, and it's always just a fucking bummer- Yeah this time of year, and, like, Bunker Hill Day without Auntie Mimi. I just miss her desperately. And so, uh, you know, they had the bagpipes go in, and you walk up Bunker Hill Street, and then you end at the bunker, and they had this really cool bench for Auntie Mimi and this one for Michelle, and they're next to each other where they used to sit, and this whole thing. So we're walking up the hill, and Danny, my nephew, is there, and he's six, and he's holding my hand, and we're walking up the hill, and they shut down traffic, and it's this whole thing, and I just hear, "Oh, what's your name? How old are you?" And I turn around, and it's whole-ass Mayor Wu. And I go, "Oh my God, Mayor Wu." Like, the whole mayor of Boston if you're not from here. Hello, ma'am. I said, "Hi, Mayor Wu." And I go, "Danny, she's the mayor of all of Boston." And he goes, "No way." And I go, "Yeah." And so he's chat- uh, just chatting with her, and she was so sweet and so kind. Also, it's th- she has plenty of shit to do. Like, the fact that she even came- Yeah was really nice of her. And she ends up, she goes, "I have something for you, but it's, it's in a car, so let me go have someone grab it." And so a couple minutes later, he goes, "Didn't the mayor say she has something for me?" And I was like, "G- listen, Pudge, she's a busy lady." Let the mayor cook. Let the mayor cook. Like, we're, we're walking uphill. Meanwhile, Erin is pushing Claire. She didn't wanna walk, so pushing the carriage uphill. It's, like, 90 degrees out, and we're all, like, sweating walking up the hill. I'm like, "Give Mayor Wu a second." And she comes back, and she gives him a coin, and there's a B on it, and it's shaped like almost like a Bruins B. And it was, like, this be kind challenge, and it was like the next time you have the opportunity, like, do something nice for someone. Danny Wu. And he goes, "I know just the thing." He stops in his tracks, turns around, finds Erin, and gives her the biggest hug. And Erin was like, "Kill me dead in the road. Just kill me dead in the street." Ugh. He's the sweetest. I just wanna put him in a bubble. Meanwhile Claire is the three-year-old, and she's, uh- she's so funny. You know when kids are in the carriage, they can, like, pull the shade up? Yeah. She pulled it up, looked at me, Mayor Woo, and Danny, gave us a side eye, and shut it again. And Mayor Woo goes, "Who's that?" I go, "That's his little sister." Stop. Yeah, it was so funny. It was so funny. So we did that walk. It was really nice, and then I went to a wedding in Nashville for my friends Shane and Jordan who are getting married. I had the best weekend. Like, it was all my... Most of my friend- not everyone, but it was most of my friends from home. And the night before, one of our friends, Alita, was like, "I've never been to Nashville." And we were like, "Oh, we're going to Broadway." And she had made reservations at this place called Butcher Town Hall. Can't recommend it enough. It was so fucking delicious. We, 12 of us, ate family style. I love that. Just got stuff for the table, everyone's drinking margs. Everyone's having a good time. Then we took Ubers to Broadway and bar hopped for the night. It was so much fucking fun, I was talking to my friends Steve and Cody. I met them when I was five. I am 30- I'm about to be 36 years old. We have been friends for 30 years. That's crazy. There was a pool at the hotel, so when everyone showed up the day everyone came, we were all just, like, hanging at the pool catching up. Like, there- it's just the best thing in the whole world, and the wedding was gorgeous. It was hot as balls, but- Naturally it was so much fun. It was, like, 100 people, so it was really nice 'cause it was this, in this farm outside of Nashville, so it was beautiful. And the flowers and, like, the ga- the gazebo thing they got married under was gorgeous. Thank God the reception was air-conditioned. We were dying. That would've been hell yeah. But, like, homemade sweet tea in the corner, and, like, the best buns I've ever had at a wedding in my life- Yes and brisket, and, like, just a true- Barbecue. Yes. Just so fucking delicious. We dance the night away. I, I have no notes. I will say, so we went to a restaurant one night, and Paula sometimes takes things from restaurants that she really likes. Salt and pepper shakers, maybe a glass. Yeah. Just depends. No judgment. And so we walk out of the restaurant, and she has a, a steak knife. And we're about to go to Broadway, and our cop friend, Cody, is like, "Yeah, so you can't just, like, whip that..." He's like, "Let me hold onto it for you. Like, if you genuinely wanna take it home." I was like, "How are you gonna get that on a plane?" Oh, was she checking a bag? Oh no, you can't. She didn't check a bag. I go, "You might have to steal a fork just so it looks like a pair." Yeah. 'Cause otherwise it just looks like you're carrying a weapon. She puts it in her boot. Okay. We go about the evening. We are pussy popping through Broadway, having a grand old time. And we get home, and we get up to the room, and she's running down the hallway. And we get to the room, and I'm like, "Oh my God, both of our keys are dead." Isn't that so fucking annoying? Like, how in the year of our Lord, 2026, are we still having cell phones or credit cards that are shutting the, the keys off? I don't know. Can we please figure that out? They have it figured out. No. And you know when you're on your last leg of the night, and you had, like, an end goal- You just wanna collapse my feet were burning. My heels hurt so bad 'cause I wore heels the entire night. I took them off in the street and Laura gasped. And I was like, "I'm sorry, they are literally burning. Like, I, I don't have a choice at this point." I also don't wanna be barefoot on Broadway. I felt like you. It was a very Colleen moment. Really beautiful thing. So we get back, and I'm just like, "I, I cannot go back downstairs." And of course, the hotel's a maze. It's not like we're in the first room. It's like this whole thing. She goes, "I will go downstairs, and I will get us keys." Runs down the hallway, yelps. Turns around, and out of her boot comes a full fucking steak knife. We completely forgot it was in there. It's a massive steak knife just sitting in her boot all night Did it ever come home? No, we had to leave it. We did have to leave it. It was a sad day. But anyway, it was p- a perfect weekend. Everyone had so much fun. Everyone was on their A game. We had the best time. I don't have a single note. I have no notes. That ever happens. I love Nashville. There is just- Nothing can go wrong in Nashville there is just something about how good the live music is in every fucking bar. Like, it's just, we went out on a Thursday night and it was as if it was Saturday night at 11:00 at night. It's just in-fucking-credible. We- The energy's just different we tried to jump in for some line dancing, which was great Oh. I mean, it was, it was a beautiful wedding. We just had the best time. Then I flew home on Saturday, got home. Also, the Nashville airport having live music in the airport in tons of bars, hilarious. I get home, I go to bed, and Sunday is Bunker Hill Day Bunker Hill Day in my family is a very big deal. It's essentially our Fourth of July. There's a massive parade every year. We go. I, I left my apartment at 10:30 and I got home at 10:00 PM. Long day. And I woke up on Monday, and I wasn't hungover, but I felt like I got hit by a bus. And now we're, now we're kicking. I'm leaving for San Fran this weekend for work. I have some fun weekend plans. I get Juneteenth off, so I have a, a long weekend. I watch Hacks. I know you don't know what that is. I know you don't watch it. I know what it is. I don't watch it. The finale came out recently. I was a wreck. I was a wreck. It's so beautiful. It's so good. It's so heartfelt. I just love that show so much. I'm obsessed. I love Hacks. Maternal instincts. We have to talk about it. We have to talk about it. It's on my list. I don't actually have the words. So I, I was unaware that she kills the human being. That was, like, I was actually sh- I knew about this. There's that movie that they made about it. I- You didn't realize, like, the family they were interviewing where she's the photographer at the wedding? Yeah, no, I did not realize. That was, like, genuinely a shock to me when they were like- Ugh, oh my God, the mom she killed her. Oh, the, yeah, the mom. The mom and the stepdad. Wait, what? It, yeah, the mom. She, she calls 911 and the dad- Yeah the stepdad shows up. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And they have to, like, go over her to get to the ca- I, I was a wreck. I was a wreck. No, I didn't realize that she legit- It's a- had to cut her open. I hope she fucking rots. And what's so scary about her is you can tell something is not right, but almost like she believes her lies. Yeah. But can't keep a story straight. I mean, imagine being her doctor knowing she got a hysterectomy and not being able to say anything. Like that woman who was like, "We just kept saying, 'Go with your gut.'" Yeah. I wonder if she got in trouble for that, 'cause it's, like, obvious. If someone said that to me, that's saying you're right. And, like, the poor people who are like, "The moment we saw it on the news, we knew who it was about." That's so- Upsetting fucking upsetting. That poor, that poor mother broke my heart People are not well Oh, I was so upset for them. Yeah. It's a, it's a really fucked up- Like should be shown by science show That person should. Yes. Do you ever wonder, maybe this is just a me thing, but like if we met that person IRL, you know, would we be like, "Something's wrong with her"? No. That is- You don't think? No. So that is the problem. Like, I think- Our judgy selves wouldn't be like, "Something ain't right about her"? I think I would. I think, I think that if you are around someone long enough, you will pick up on things where you go, "Well, that doesn't make sense." And you will eventually get to that point. If you met this person one singular time, no, I think, unfortunately, people like her are charming and kind and friendly and can... I mean, that woman at work that she worked with- Yeah who was like, "I lost a child." I cried with her. I g- I- that's, that's someone who was working with her on a day-to-day basis, and they were friends. Yeah. So I think that's what's so scary about- Trust no one this type of per- no, don't say that. But it's just like that type of personality can blend in easier. We want them to stick out. We want them to be like the boogeyman, but it, they're not. They hide in plain sight. It's fucking terrifying. She, she is a sick, sick person. And like the fact that she already had children she wasn't paying child support for. She wa- like, wh- why do you need more of them? Justice for Wade. J- poor Wade, when they're like, everybody stares at him, and he can't go anywhere. I'm like, y- can this man please find some fucking peace? Yeah, like, come here and have a farm. We'll take care of you. Yeah. Come on, Wade. Bring that farm over here. The, that entire friend group. Like, you just never recover from that. Like the friend who said, "I don't think she's pregnant," and they fought, and like after everything happened, they reconnected, and he started crying talking about it. Like it, there n- it, those are the types of stories where no one leaves unscathed. Yeah. And it's so fucking upsetting. No one worse than her family, her and the family, of course. Mm. And they also said that- Of the woman who- They- was murdered whoever, I forget who was, got in contact with her mom, and she's like, "I've been waiting for this call." Like that's creepy. Yeah. That's crazy. Yeah. And it's like, who hurt you? Like, seriously. That made you a fucking weirdo. Truly. Anything else you've been watching? No, but I have random thoughts. I've been so busy, I'm not even caught up on my podcasts. I'm, it, I am all over the motherfucking place. He's all over the place. I have great news. Okay. Things We Never Got Over is getting a show. You're gonna hate it. You don't know that. I loved Off Campus. I'm telling you, they're not gonna look like the way that... Can we just set expectations now? Off Campus met my expectations. I hope you love it. I know. I love this for you. I'm not yucking your yum. I would just like to set expectations that characters may not look the way that you want them to look, and they may add in some characters that may not ex- this in the book, and I need you to hear me. Are you listening? Yeah, but I don't like it. Right. You don't have to, but I just, I know how upset you're gonna be if this does not look perfectly and exactly like the book. Well, then you'll be hearing from me. Okay, maybe you should start writing strong-worded letters. In other news, r- in relation to this, did we ever talk about or slash did you ever read Icebreaker? I don't think you ever did, but I don't know, and I don't remember- Is that the other hock- smutty hockey book? Y- it's one of them, yeah. Is sh- It was a one of one. But she's a skater? Yes. They're making that into a sh- Figure skater either a show or a movie. Alex Cooper is producing it. Ah. Stop ruining my life. Yeah. Yep, and she's preggo. Yeah. Very preggo. Yes, she is. Whatever, fuck her, though. Jesus. I updated my phone. Okay. And it's the worst thing that's ever happened to me. Colleen, I need you to touch some grass. That's a crazy statement to say. It i- everything's different. I hate it. Also, maybe you can help me with this. Do, have you, do you have an updated phone, now that I sound like a 90-year-old? Considering last night I sat on the phone with Apple to help my- blind, elderly friends- Okay you'd sound exactly like them. Tell me. When I do it, take a screenshot now I have to go through this whole bullshit? I love that. I hate it. I just wanna save it. The whole bullshit, the whole bullshit she's talking about is where it allows you to just send it and delete it without saving it to your photos- Oh. You mean that- or saving it to your photos. Oh. Does it delete it right after? Yes, so it doesn't get added to your storage. Oh, I've been sh- I'm, like, cl- saving every single one. It's really annoying. No, you literally screenshot- I'm really bad with technology and you can, you can send it. Oh, okay. I like that. And then that's it, and then it just doesn't go anywhere. But I like that. Oh, I'm glad I could change your mind. Thank you for calling Apple Support. I hope you have a wonderful day. Wait, no, what's the name? I'll be sending you an email, and you can rate me on a scale from one to 10. I'm an Apple Music girly. You're an Apple Music girly. I am an Apple Music girly. When you go- everything's on the bottom now, and it's pissing me off. Okay, so if you click on it. Yeah? Nope. Oh. Go back. Oh. How do I go back? Home. Click on the actual name of the song. Okay. Is that what you're looking for? No, I just, when I searched, used to search, it was all up here. Now it's all down here. Okay. It's driving me- Okay crazy. Listen, change is hard. I don't like it. Got it. Anything else? They shouldn't have ever changed it. And now I keep seeing people type, freaking me out. I love to ignore. Or, like, sometimes I'll type things and then delete it, and then I'm like, "Oh, I actually feel like answering." And I can't do that. You've never had the three bubbles? Come on, everyone has the three bubbles that pop up. No, I, I was, like, 10 updates behind. Oh, girl, you're a wreck. I hate change. You are a wreck. I hate change. No, that's clear. I was o- oh, uh, when I was on that Bachelorette this weekend, there was a girl there who was complaining about, um... Not complaining, but she would be like, re- reference everything she thought, felt, saw. I'm an SSRI girly. And I was like- What does that mean? Like, Lexapro. Like, that, like- Oh. And it was like, "Oh, I'm really hot 'cause I'm an SSRI girly." I was like, "Listen, bitch, I'm fat and on an SSRI. No one can complain about the heat but me, okay? I don't wanna hear it." To use that as an excuse, wrong. Does- Wrong does it make you hot? Apparently. I didn't know that until she said it. But, like, just, that was one of, like, 30 examples she used of, like- Oh, like, that was the excuse- Yeah "I'm on an SSRI." "And, and it's an SSRI." I'm like, "Listen." Who, who among us? What, they hate to see me coming. The Prozac loves me. Great news that no one cares about. I know I think I brought it up one time, but it, I'm really dialed in now, and I, I cracked the hack. Hard-boiled eggs, they're back in. Colleen, I just- But you know what it is? What? Please tell me what it is. I can't pick them up and bite them. Like, it has to be cut in half already. Why are we still forcing this? 'Cause they, they look so appetizing. They're great. They're just great. They're a little bite and, like But I just didn't like them, and I got myself to like them. I like them now. I love that for you. Thank you. And I'm happy for you. I am so over the Knicks fans. Oh, I love it. I'm so happy for the Knicks. I'm over them. The Christian Dior Knicks in four. Can people stop standing on taxis and ruining them and people's formative income? Oh, no, no, no, no. The, the celebrating over the top- Sorry if you've never had a win in your fucking life. Okay. No, hate it. Hate it. I am so happy for them. I love that New York just feels electric right now. Like, I w- my friends, Steve and Alita, live in Brooklyn. Sorry, I'm being mean. Whatever. And they flew home and were there for game five when they won, and they were just like, "Bridget, it's summer. The Knicks are in," like, it, the vibes are just fucking immaculate, and I love that for them. I was there for game three maybe? Of the Knicks? Yeah. Yes, I was there. I was there two weeks ago. Oh, yeah. I mean, probably- Every bar feral. It's too much. Not even, though. It would be like, and they weren't even scoring. What do you like? I know, I haven't really had anything positive to say this day, on this particular day. I will say something that I did think was crazy is we pulled up to a bar that we were supposed to be meeting people at, and it was silent outside. And like, but like you could kinda hear people in the bar, and we opened the bar door and it was like obviously wall-to-wall, which like I love that for them. But even if I went to a bar in Boston and it was like the last Bruins game and it was that packed, I wouldn't enter. Like, we all collectively were like, "We wouldn't even enter if th- this was the Bruins." Which is like- Mm to give you context, that's all I'm saying. And we texted the friends and we're like, "Where are you? We cannot find you," because there's, we're sweaty body to sweaty body in here. And they're like, "Oh, we're outside." We had walked by the outside side patio that had TVs, and they were watching so intently that it was silent. There was 100 people out there. Yeah, you could hear a pin drop. I was like, oh, like I opened the door and I immediately thought- And it's probably jarring and everyone, I was like, "Oh, hello." Like I was- Have I walked in on something? I, I was, I was like, "Sorry about that. He's not from here." They're probably like, "Shut the fuck up." No, literally, that's probably what they were thinking. And I was like, "Hello." So I was there for- Just stop draping your hair all over my couch It's blonde hair, so I'm, that's why I'm concerned. It's not mine. I'm, I'm not blonde. Who's blonde here? Unless you have a bush I don't know about. A blonde bush. I don't know. You think I one, have a bush- He has a- and it's blonde? frosted tip. You think I have a frosted tip bush? It's braided. Yeah, I love to braid my blonde- It's blonde, I don't know what you want from me frosted bush- It's blonde on the couch. It's blonde. I guess we're quote-unquote happy for the Knicks, but I'm not. But I understand the energy was probably great. I saw a TikTok today. What? A woman trying to climb some sort of telephone pole- Oh street pole No street something. Why are we doing that? And this white girl sitting on it, and this girl takes her from the side and fucking tosses her on the ground. No. And she continues to climb, and the white girl gets up and tries to tear her down and pulls her pants down, and she has this big ass. And the woman starts, like, trying to tear her down and slapping her ass, so she starts twerking. And these were Knicks fans. And all the Knicks fans were like, "Whoa, whoa, wow!" The escalation. No, I hated it. It was fucking feral. It was feral. Well- I'm happy for them. It's... They've had a drought. I'm happy for Spike Lee. I hope Timothée Chalamet is happy. I'm happy for Mariska Hargitay. See, there you go. There you go. There's a win. There's a positive. There's a positive. Dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun. Dun, dun, bam, bam, bam, bam. She took some time away from the streets for the, this series. It took some time away from her job. Did you see Jamie Lee Curtis saying that she's, like, the heartbeat of the entire show, and is, like, so passionately yelling at, at her on Actors on Actors? And it's, it's, it's just what the entire human race wants to say to Mariska Hargit- Hargitay. Wow. Let me thank you, Jamie Lee Curtis. To Mariska. Have you seen, um, someone reenacting or talking about J.Lo's reaction? No. Oh, my God. You've never seen, like, the parody of people being like, "POV: You're J.Lo finding out about the"... Did you see the video of her? I have no idea what you're talking about. Okay. I'll show you the video of J.Lo. Someone recorded her when the Knicks won, and it's just, like, so J.Lo, but someone, um- Does she not react at all? No, she's like, "Oh, my God." She's like, "We gotta call everybody. Like, bitch, we all watching. You know who we calling." Hold on. Do you think it's performative? Yes. And someone was, like, pretending to be her, or it's like, "POV: You're J.Lo getting ready for the Knicks win." It's like, "Okay, so you have to record me, and, like, this is what in the..." Like, telling her what to do, and it was actually very on par. But Sox is like, even if it's all genuine, 'cause, you know, she is from New York- Mm-hmm, she is even if she's loved the Knicks her whole life, that girl, she just cannot do a thing right. No, she can't. I fear she can't. E- even the things that she probably means at this point, it- she's just got so many fucking haters. Her credibility is shot the Scots in Boston. I'm so upset that I wasn't around for that I got so many texts of like, "You're in Nashville and your husband is finally in the city." "What are you doing? I will be out about this weekend. You will not be able to stop me. I will find a man in a kilt, and I will make him take me back to Edinburgh, and I will live on a farm- Never come back and I will never see any of you bitches ever again." Okay. And godspeed. And I would love that for you. Listen, if I can't get an Irish one, I'm getting a Scottish one. Close enough. Same but different font. Exactly. Italicized. Can I tell you that Manza's brother was in Ireland this past week? Ugh. And we hadn't heard from him, so we were like, "Hey." The greatest place on earth. I was saying he goes, "The worst country I've ever been to. They have terrible water pressure." What, Frankie? "Terrible food." We were like... I thought he was kidding. We're like, "What?" He texts- It's literally the greatest place on earth. It's God's country. I mean, he probably is expected to be eating, like, fish and chips and stews all day long, so, like, maybe he wasn't prepped for that? I don't know. I don't know. But I was dying laughing- Go to Italy when he's like, "The water pressure sucks." Such a plumber thing to say. That's why. I always thought you would laugh at that. Um- Jesus Amanda Batula is disgusting. The reunions have come out. I did not watch this most recent one. They did, like, a third extended. I cannot. She's just, like, so unbothered and disgusted. And I looked at Fiona and said, "If I ever did something to you, no mat- Not even talking about, like, fucking your boyfriend or whatever, or your ex-boyfriend. If I did anything to you that made you so upset sitting on a couch with me that you are crying about something that I did about you, I would kill myself." Like, Sierra's weeping, and she's like this. Yeah. She's- In her fuck-ass bun. Yeah. I saw... I know we say this all the time, but I saw a TikTok that was like, you know the part where she's saying, I might have alr- already said this on the pod. Maybe. Who cares? Basically saying, "I didn't choose this. I didn't choose this." Yeah. And it's like, no, you didn't choose it. You were picked. It's your favorite thing. Mm-hmm. That's your favorite thing to be, Amanda, picked. That's the whole point. That's the problem. I don't know what beta blockers they both took before the reunions. But also, they don't- There's such a lack of empathy It was something more, because someone was writing in. Someone said, like, beta blockers don't actually change your feelings. Like, they don't make you, like, numb to things. Right. Right. They just are, it's the way you react, so you're not sweating, you're not anxious, you're not shaking. Right. Like, things like that, so it's like, there's not... That's genuine. That's not beta blocker. That's simply not. Right. They're not on drugs. They're- Yeah straight up have no empathy because they don't fucking care. They're just straight up sitting there like, "Yeah." They're just assholes. You look like Keith Morelf, and she is a twat. I, I cannot believe that the man that we're fighting about is West. He is such a fucking doofus. And someone was talking about this the other day. Oh, me and Liam were talking about it in the Cape, say the series goes the way that it's supposed to, that West and Sierra get back together, Amanda and Kyle split up- They're Kiki-ing, they're best friends, and like e- everyone's a happy family. West would immediately get the good guy edit. Oh, look at him being good friends to Amanda, getting back with Sierra, understanding that he fucked up. Yeah. Bounce back. Amanda Batula can get a full Ariana Madix makeover, like full redemption arc, Dancing With the Stars- She's dead Traders. The amount of money- She, she was on her way to getting that though, but- That's what I mean. The amount of money, the amount of brands who will literally not touch her with a 10-foot pole- Yeah for West Wilson he better have a magical dick. I'm sorry. Have you seen his nudes? No. Oh, I'll show you them. No, I don't wanna see his nudes. That feels like a, a violation- They're on his- of someone's privacy they're on the Twitter. No, I don't wanna see them. All right. Okay. That feels wrong. Okay. Well, it's talked about in the reunion, and he's like, "Yeah." And well, they came out, so they were, um, posted- Did he release them? No, somebody else did. But he was like, "Oh, I've sent those to, like, so many people." Like, he doesn't care. but he was like, "Oh." And when someone said, "I think there was nudes leaked of you," sitting on the couch at the reunion, he goes, "Oh, are my, am I soft or hard?" Like, the fact that you, one, don't know and also don't care is disturbing. I just, uh, I love Dara too. Yeah. So I have been an OG Dara fan 'cause I follow her on TikTok because of her makeup. So when I heard she was gonna be on Summer House, I was like, "Oh, this will be great." When she fucking reads him to filth. Mm. Get him. Drag him. I ju- I don't... And I don't get it, and I kind of feel like Amanda got off easy. Would you agree with that? Yeah, if I was Sierra, I would've beat her ass up. But the questions towards Amanda, it's just like w- I, I, I just don't feel like any of it was answered. I think that, no, 'cause yeah, she doesn't answer any of the questions, but also- That's what I mean. She like- She also d- they kind of beat around the bush with the questions. Like, it's like they were trying to be less aggressive. I don't know if there was a conversation beforehand. But I would just straight up be like, "Do you have remorse? Why did you do this?" But they don't ask- This is what I mean, the direct- That's not Andy's MO, though. Andy doesn't do that. But Lindsay made a good point of like, when you guys were all c- fucking coming for me at another reunion, I never got up. Amanda gets up and takes a one-hour break. Yeah. And ma- it- she's just the worst. Yeah, she is. And I hope it was fucking worth it. And to be totally honest with you, I hope they get married and s- ride off into the sunset because that is the only way any of this makes sense, is if he's it, even though I know that won't happen. I think everyone including them know it's not, it's not the end. That's what's so upsetting about it. What if, what if you were just like, "Yeah, I actually really fucked up. I was b- I was so lonely, and..." I, I don't know, just like eat it a bit more. Or anything else. Anything else. Do anything. Full remorse. M- like, crying because she feels misunderstood and like the victim instead of being like, "Sierra, I'm so sorry you hurt, I hurt you." Yeah. "You have had my back for nearly a fucking decade. I am so..." N- like, nothing. No. So disappointing. Yeah. Her argument is like, "I wasn't married." It's like, not about that. It's not about that. I didn't choose him. What am I supposed to be celibate? No, bitch. No one's asked you to do that. Just anybody else. Think about how many people are in New York. L- literally- Take any of them a- anybody else. You're in a city with millions and millions of people. Cast a line, pick any of them. Get fucked. Not with West. By the way, my last thought of the day. Can they stop gaslighting us into tornadoes here? Into tornadoes? Yes. Every t- every once in a while I get so excited 'cause it's like tornado warning. W- where? Where? Stop trying to make it seem like, try t- stop trying to make fetch happen. It's not gonna happen. Excited about a tornado? Yeah, I'd like to see a little tornado touchdown. Oh. Y- y- well you've never, no one's excited about a tornado. Yeah, but why do they- Those aren't like good things why do they sing it all the time? Like, tornado watch, tornado warning. All the time? Yeah, we got one today. Okay. Like, why? I, I didn't. In the summer we do. We get them a lot in the summer. But we would never get- I know, so stop, stop gaslighting us. Stop. Relabel it- Yeah to say like, a storm. Something's happening. There's something they're not telling us. There's something they're not telling us. See, w- l- the weather l- app is lying to us. I don't know who's running it, but they deserve to be fired. If it rains for one hour of the day, stop making the entire day look rainy. I would agree. You have to look at the hourly, which is stupid. W- and even then, it's not even fucking accurate. Facts. What are you, what are you bitches doing? Put Mother Nature on the phone. Someone get me Mother Nature. Ring, ring, bitch. She not answering. Anything else? No, but I do have to pee. I do too. Okay. Thank you. A-one, a-two, a-three, four, five. Okay, it's a Bridget episode today. Are you ready? Never, but yes. Today we are talking about Paris Hilton in the betterment camp that she was taken to when she was a kid. Oh, my God, that's so random of you. I know. I like it, though. I think you're really gonna like it. It's really dark, and it's really depressing, but it, in true Bridget fashion, it has a good ending. Positive tings. Yes. Okay. Some positive things. Okay, so my sources for today are This Is Paris. It's free on YouTube. It came out in 2020. And Trapped in Treatment is a podcast. Paris Hilton is the executive producer. There are two hosts that are women. One is a survivor of one of these camps- Oh, wow slash schools, and I use schools very lightly, and any time I say schools in this episode, I want you to know I'm putting a hard quote. Quotation mark. Yeah, hard. And the other host is an investigator. Okay. I'm gonna hop around a bit, but stay with me, okay? Paris Hilton is the great-granddaughter of Conrad Hilton. He created the Hilton hotels all over the world. They are super fucking rich, like, rich beyond all wildest dreams rich. Her parents named her Paris because they love the city of Paris, of course, and when she was a kid, her nickname was Star. Okay. She has always been obsessed with animals, all animals. They talk about, like, she had a snake, she had goats, she had ponies. Like, she had fucking everything. She was actually a bit of a tomboy, and Nicky, her sister- That's crazy was a girly girl. Huh. I will say Kyle Richards is in this documentary, and she was like, "I do believe there was an obsession with Paris' looks too young." Like, there was just a lot of comments about how pretty she was and, like- Got it all of that. Her family is very strict and very conservative. She wasn't allowed to wear certain clothes or makeup or date or do really anything unladylike. Kathy Hilton was cracking that whip, okay? I love Kathy Hilton. And when she's 15, they move from LA to Manhattan, and she, Paris immediately falls in love with all the glitz and the glamour. At one point, they're living out of the Waldorf Astoria while she's going to high school. Casual. Okay, Gossip Girl. She's getting bullied, though. I think she always felt just really different from everybody else. Like I said, Kathy's super strict. She puts Paris and Nicky into etiquette classes and, like, debutante shit. Oh, very Gossip Girl then. They were constantly corrected about everything. They just could not breathe without being on the tabloids and in the newspaper, and they're heiresses, so they're Americans' version of royalty. Like, this is before social media, so if they went outside and they were, like, in a tank top, it was racy and slutty. Yeah. Right? So Kathy, w- in my opinion, she doesn't say this, but in my opinion, Kathy Hilton swung the pendulum the other way of, like, if you're gonna constantly be in the press, we're gonna, like, full Kate Middleton you, and you're just not gonna be able to do anything without looking prim and proper. Got it. Paris was like, it was like The Stepford Wives. We were told what to do, how to do it. Nothing was ever good enough. It had to be ladylike. You know, they just couldn't do anything. And so she does what every teenager does, period, regardless of how much money you have, and she rebels. Obviously. Because she hates it. She wants freedom. She just has all of this money, and she's like, "Fuck you guys." So she starts sneaking out. She starts going out to nightclubs. She's living for the night. It's driving her parents nuts. She cannot be tamed. She cannot be sequestered. They put her in therapy at one point, and the guy says to Paris, "Why do you sneak out?" And she's like, "I just want freedom and I want parent, my parents to let me live." And he's like, "Well, you should go to a betterment camp." Cool. At this point- great. At this point she's completely addicted to the nightlife. It is, the way she describes it, is it's the only place she feels fully accepted. This is where the character of Paris Hilton is born. Okay. If you don't know much about Paris Hilton, just know everything that you've seen in the media is manicured. That is actually not who she is as a person. That is a persona she puts on in public eye. It's like a shield. It's like a defense mechanism, which we'll get into. That's hot. That's hot. And, like, the voice, everything about it, the clothes, all of it. So she loves music. She loves having fun. She loves getting on a table and dancing and partying. This is where she feels happy and free and her, and welcome. Okay. Kathy Hilton is not fucking happy about it. As you can imagine. At one point she is on the phone with nightclubs threatening them. Of like, "If, if you fucking let my daughter in, I will shut your ass down." Like, she is not happy. At one point Paris' parents lock her in her bedroom because they're like, "You need to stop escaping." So they're- The killer is escaping. It, truly. So they're really trying to fix her behavior, so they send her to this, like, outdoor wilderness style program. Mm-hmm. Paris is 16, okay? Imagine 16-year-old Paris Hilton. It's in the middle of fucking nowhere. It's manual labor all day long. They're getting screamed at. It's very boot camp. And so Paris rallies the other girlies, and she's like, "Let's get the fuck out of here tonight." She's a leader. And so they g- they make a run for it, essentially, like, through the mountains, and it's through corn fields and stuff, and a group of boys finds them, brings them back, and they are beaten physically. And they're hit in front of everyone in the camp to set an example of like, this is what happens when you try to leave. Got it. She gets out of there. They send her to another place. She escapes there for, as well. She just keeps running away. She goes to another place. She escapes. At one point she jumps down an entire flight of stairs. Like, she is desperate. At one point she escapes, and the Hiltons shut down the local airport so she can't get away. Oh. So just imagine, like, you at your most rebellious with all the unlimited funds a human could have, and being a 16-year-old girl. Got it. Yeah. So at their wit's end, the Hillins send Paris to a place called Provo Canyon School. All right. Air quotes. In Utah. I will call it- So it's in Utah. I will call it Provo or PCS. Okay. It's a betterment camp type of school, and we will talk about why these schools even exist to begin with. This is how it goes. Paris wakes up in the middle of the night. Two men are standing over her with a flashlight in her face saying, "We can do this the easy way or the hard way." They grab her. She kicks. She screams. She, at the top of her, lungs, yells, "Help me, help me, help me." She is fighting them off. The trauma. They then handcuff her and blindfold her while she's s- sobbing. And as they are pulling her... She fully thinks she's getting kidnapped, because she is. Out of the blindfold at some point she can see down the hallway, and both of her parents are watching this and sobbing. Nikki says she heard what was going on, but she didn't do anything. And the next morning, her mother was like, she's at boarding school. And they were like, "Did you, did you ask why?" And she was like, "No, her behavior was out of control." Yeah. "Like, I was a good kid. She was sneaking out all the time. I just figured they sent her to a school and she didn't wanna go. I had no idea-" Yeah "what was happening." So they fly her to Utah to attend Provo. Mm-hmm. So let's talk about just the troubled teen industry just for a second and these betterment camps, because you may be saying to yourself like, "What the fuck is that and why do these things exist?" The troubled teen industry didn't appear out of nowhere. A lot of it, a lot of it goes back to the '50s and '60s when addiction treatment programs started experimenting with aggressive, quote-unquote, tough love therapy. If you are from my generation or above, think of like the Scared Straight program on crack. Got it. Okay? There was this drug rehab facility, and it eventually becomes super cult-like, and one of its main techniques involved putting people in circles and verbally tearing each other apart under the belief that humiliation and confrontation could break down unhealthy behaviors. Oh. From peop- for... Yeah. It, it, it's so insane. So this has been going on for a very long time. This is not new. Got it. Other programs copied these methods and thought, "Okay, well, if this works on addicts, maybe it can work on rebellious teenagers." Hmm. Again, parents who are just, like, at their wit's end and don't know what to do. So by the 1970s and '80s, because of the war on drugs and all of the shit that comes with it, parents were terrified of drugs and gangs and juvenile delinquency, and programs began marketing themselves as a last resort for struggling families. They promised to turn troubled kids into responsible young adults through strict discipline, behavior modification, and isolation from negative influences. And you might be thinking to yourself like, "Okay, you can say that." These schools have great marketing. Like, in the day of Google- Mm-hmm if you Google them, it's this, like, reformed kid who's like, "I used to do X, Y, and Z, and now here I am," and everyone looks normal and healthy, and it's all about, like, mental health, and it's... Th- their marketing is a fucking lie. Mm-hmm. These places are hellscapes. I... It is absolute hell. I cannot stress this enough. Then they, all of these places kind of break off to these sister programs, so that's when you get your, like, wilderness style bullshit. They learned discipline and self-reliance, and many of these wilderness programs became feeders into longer term residential treatment centers- Oh in boarding schools, therapeutic boarding schools. So you might be thinking to yourself, "Okay, but they're only sending, like, really troubled kids there. They're only sending, like, the worst of the worst." So no lots of the kids sent to these s- quote, unquote schools were caught sneaking out, bad grades, drinking alcohol, smoking weed, being sexually active, or fighting with their parents. It's giving parents who don't wanna parent. It's just like a, it's just not the answer. It's just not the... What, what I'm about to describe to you, I can understand parents not realizing that's what they're sending their child into, and I hope that if they had known that, it, they would seek alternate routes. Yeah. But this is fucking crazy. So in Paris' case, she was just a wealthy teenager who liked to party. So- Amen, sister, I understand. Live your life. Right. So the fact that parents could legally hire strangers to take their kid out of bed at 2:00 AM sounds like something out of some dystopian future. Mm-hmm. But it was a legitimate business, and it's technically not kidnapping because the parents sign off on it. Right. They're paying for it. Yes. They're literally paying for it. Also, let's talk about the transportation for a second. Mm-hmm. Because, like, why do they show up in the middle of the night? Why are they grabbing you? Why are they shining a flashlight in your eyes? All of this is on purpose. They say it is the best course of action. Mm-hmm. Because if you approach someone broad daylight in the kitchen, they can grab a knife, harm themselves, harm the parents, harm the security guards, the people taking them. In the middle of the night, you catch them- You're vulnerable yep, you catch them off guard. It's fast, it's efficient, and it scares the hell out of them, and so fast apart... Th- things move quicker. Yeah. they also say that the people who take them are trained in, like, de-escalation and handling with care so no one gets harmed, and- I don't know if I believe that yada, yada, yada. Every single person, because this podcast talked directly to survivors, every single one says this is the beginning of the trauma for the fir- the person being taken, anyone who witnesses it, the siblings, the parents. Top to bottom, it is worst fucking case scenario. This is like the spider crack in the window. Got it. Absolutely atrocious. And again, all of this is legal. So Provo, just a massive trigger warning before we get into this. We are talking child abuse, we are talking drugs, r- every single trigger warning you can think of, just insert it here. Some of the kids who went here Don't have memories of being there. And- Because it was that traumatic? Yes. And that's not because your, your brain was having so much fun. That's because they literally blocked it out because of how awful it is. From the moment you get there, you are stripped, you are s- you are searched, you are asked to squat and cough. They do a vaginal search, like a really horrific one. Again, some of these kids skipped class, and as they're walking down the hallway, there are people in straitjackets screaming. Oh. People pissing on themselves. Like, it is... The moment you walk in, you're like, "Oh, Toto's not in fucking Kansas anymore." Like, this is crazy. They had this class structure where they would pit kids against other kids, and if you did well, you got benefits and you would get privileges. Mm. Like, really small privileges. The lowest of the low was called investment, and investment is when you were in the most trouble. Sometimes it would be sitting in a chair and staring at the wall for hours and hours and hours on end. And if you even made the slightest movement, so like kids with ADHD or anything that would make them jerk, they would get beaten and told, like, they had to sit there for longer. The, the game was essentially rigged for you to fail, for these kids to fail. The worst of it was when they put you in the investment room. Mm-hmm. They would strip you down so you, quote-unquote, "didn't hurt yourself." You are in tiny shorts and a tiny, tiny shirt. They would jack up the AC on purpose. They would not feed you. It is complete solitary confinement. They could observe you, and there was one skylight And you were just yelled at and humiliated on a regular basis. Paris said that the people who worked there seemed to get off on torturing children and seeing them naked. Sickos. It's so fucked. They prescribe everyone pills, but wouldn't tell you what you were taking. So if you were like, "What is this?" They wouldn't tell you. Paris was forced to take pills that made her super tired, and she felt numb all the time. Some people in there were described, and she describes this, of like lights on and no one's home. Yikes. Tons of kids on suicide watch. Paris at one point realizes she can spit her pills out into her Kleenex so she can, like, feel normal and her brain can operate. But because the system was set up for them to all rat on each other, someone tells on her. And they eventually find the Kleenex where she's been spitting all of her pills. They put her in solitary confinement. They put her in the investment room. She's freezing. She's starving. She's alone. She's scared. She said there was someone in the next room screaming in a straitjacket, and she was there for over 20 hours. If that isn't bad enough and you're thinking like, "Oh, well maybe they may not be the worst of the worst, but at least they're like- Yeah late teens or young adults," the, one of the youngest people at Provo is eight. Ugh So they purposely try to break you while you're in there. 56 calls of assault and 25 sexual assault calls happened to the police from Provo in a matter of a few years, and that's just the ones we know about. So as she's sitting in this horrific, uh, camp, school, whatever the fuck you wanna call it, she hates her parents. She hates them. She's there for 11 months, and she says the only thing that saved her, and they show this horrible... But it's so sweet, and it's, like, her... It's an animation of her sitting in investment with barely any clothes on, freezing on the ground- Mm curled up, and the only thing that saves her is what she's gonna do when she gets out and who she's gonna become, and she's just picturing all the success she's gonna have. And she's just like, "I'm gonna get so successful, and I'm gonna make so much money. My parents will never be able to control me ever again." And she says they had no idea how bad it was. And when she gets out, she's 18 years old. She is so traumatized about Provo, she doesn't tell anyone. She doesn't talk to Nikki. She doesn't talk to Kathy. She doesn't talk to her dad. She talks to none of her friends about it. Yikes. No one. And the people she knew in there, they didn't have contact with each other. Oh, okay. So when they get out, it's like they're out. And- And no one's talking about it? No. No, no, no, no, no, no, no. No. And she just had everything taken away from her, and so she's like, "That's why I always want stuff. That's why I always want things because I, I just got everything taken. So now when I wanna get something, I just buy it." And she was like, "I've always had trust issues, especially in relationships." But, like, with her parents, everybody. So Paris gets out. She doesn't talk about it with her family, but what does she do next? Well, she's Paris motherfucking Hilton, so she's an icon. She's partying, she's modeling, and then her sex tape comes out. Mm. She was pressured into doing that. That was not something she wanted to do. She was 19. She was fucking traumatized. She was deeply in love with this guy. He guilted her and pressured her into it. He said it was just for them, and then he released it. And he kind of made this blueprint of, like, if you spread a sex tape, you will become famous. Mm. And there's this really heartbreaking moment where she was like, "I never... That I had a plan. I never needed that. I never needed to do that. And had I not gone to Provo and been traumatized on a daily fucking basis and told that that type of behavior was normal, I nev- that never would have happened." Yikes. And then that comes out, like, 2001. In 2003, The Simple Life comes out. Oh, wow. So she is just, like, in every tabloid, and of course, every late night host made her the fucking butt of every single joke. SNL did too. Yeah. Like, you know, back in the early aughts. I mean, they just got it. If you're in the limelight, just expect it. Yeah, but especially in the early aughts. We're talking, like, Christina and Britney and- Paris yeah, just a really horrible time to be in the paparazzi's eye. And at the time, after The Simple Life comes out, a picture of Paris was selling for $1 million. That's crazy. So ima- imagine you're the paparazzi, right? And you know that the best picture will get a million dollars. What does that cause? Fucking war. People- Yeah are literally- Stalking her probably stalking her and beating the shit out of each other to get to her- Yeah to get a picture of her. Paparazzi are such an ick. It's so gross. It... Literally, go get a real job. You're so fucking gross. But then what's interesting is she decides she wants to take control over her own image fully, and instead of relying on people taking her photo, she starts taking pictures of herself. Okay, baddie. The selfie. Paris Hilton becomes the first influencer in the world by recording herself on a regular basis and taking pictures of herself. She literally creates the selfie. And the vlog. Yes. Now she's like a DJ, she's a designer, she's a model, she's an actor, she's a singer. Anything in the entertainment industry- That bitch can do Paris Hilton has done. She has like s- 19 product lines or something that have- Yeah all raked in millions and millions of dollars. Like, she is that bitch. So I wanna go back to the documentary. It, it's really about like Paris being Paris, right? The clothes, the closet- Yeah the money, the p- the paps are everywhere, everyone's shooting pictures of her. She's flying all over the world. Full, full circle. She was a bling ring. Yes. And at one point she flies to Korea, and two of her fans show up at the airport and flew over 30 hours to see her. She has fans all over the world, she calls them the little Hiltons. And then when you start to really get into the documentary, you see how lonely she is. Yeah. And like, it, what happened to her is eating her up inside. She's not s- she has a reoccurring nightmare- Yeah of two men standing over her in the middle of the night. She can't sleep. Traumatic. She's so traumatized, she has horrific insomnia. Mm-hmm. She hates going to sleep, it causes her a ton of stress. She's flying all over the world where people love her but don't know her. Yeah. Because they just know this persona she created- Yeah in a nightclub to feel loved and seen and accepted and free. Yikes. And so then it stuck, this brand like stuck with her, and she can't separate from it. And so, you know, at one point she's in a makeup chair, and she's like, "Yeah, I got three hours of sleep last night." And she starts talking about her dream, and she starts crying in the makeup chair, like curled up. And at one point her sister says to her like, "Hey, maybe you should go on vacation." And she's like, "Yeah, right." She hasn't been on vacation t- since she was a little kid, like a teenager or something. She can't relax. She shows her phone screen time, and this was in 2020 when it came out, it's like 16 hours a day. She's just constantly on her phone. She really struggles with dating. Yeah. And she says, you know- Well, she's fine now Yeah, and she just talks really openly about the sex tape and how traumatizing that was. And in the documentary she's dating a guy, and before he comes over she's setting up hidden cameras. And she's like, "I have horrific trust issues." Yeah. And she's DJing at Tomorrowland, which is like this massive festival. It's like the biggest festival in the world. And her boyfriend starts a fight with her before her set, and they're screaming at each other, and she's like, "He's so drunk." Yeah. And she's got her playlist up on her computer. He drops the com- the computer, then he shuts it, and she's like, "What the fuck are you doing?" They fight so bad she takes his wristbands off and is like, "Get the fuck out," and dumps him on, in the documentary. Yeah, she should. And at one point she starts to cry. I just felt so bad for her. She says you know, "This is a fantasy cartoon life that I created." And she points to all of her shoes, and she goes, "The thing is, I don't give a fuck about any of these things. I've hardly worn any of these shoes. I just wanna sit in my sweatpants and hang." Like, she wants to scrapbook, she wants to hang with her dog, and she wants to eat leftovers. She's done. That, that is who Paris Hilton actually is. So all of this being said, she decides to reach back out to her roommates from Provo, the people who were there at the same time as her. It's been 20 years. That's crazy. They all come together at Paris' house and have a conversation. They all cry. It's so beautiful to watch, but also I just can't even imagine. Yeah. They all have nightmares. They all talk about how they were all in abusive relationships at one point Paris says that she has dated five different men that got physical with her, there is a direct correlation- Of course there is of how they were treated when they were teenagers and who they dated. Yeah. 100%. 100%. At one point, like, getting angry means you care. Yeah. And it's just, that's just not true. At one point they talk to Kathy, like the interviewers off-screen say to Kathy, you know, "She was put in solitary confinement." And Kathy, to her credit, looks shocked and was like, "She never told me that." And then there's another part where Paris sits Kathy down and says, "Hey, we're doing this campaign where we wanna talk about what happened to us at Provo." And Kathy's like, "Yeah, when they yelled at you?" Like, just does not understand. Yeah. And then Paris goes on to just say, you know, "We were abused," and she just talks about it like they've never talked about it before. And every time, she says, "Every time I tried to tell someone in the family, they told us inside, 'We'll just tell your family you're lying.' We were punished, we were abused, so we weren't allowed to talk about it." Yeah. "And we'll just say you're a liar and you're making the whole thing up." Kathy understandably gets so upset, and she says, "Had I known and Dad known, we would've been there in a second." Mm. And they hug it out, and they say, "I love you." And Paris, with her fr- friends from Provo, they do this, um, Instagram campaign called Breaking Code Silence, and they basically write on a poster board all the things they experienced, and they put duct tape over their mouth and take a picture and post it, and it's horrific. I mean, they're just, the abuse on these posters, the... It's just awful. Paris posts this on her Instagram. Yeah. And she says, like, "I waited so long 'cause I was so worried about my company, and my business is so important to me, that I was worried that this would deter the rest of my life," but it, it does the opposite. It's such a big deal. The thing that these survivors had been talking about for decades and nobody was listening, now one of the most famous women in the world are like, "Hey, by the way, it happened to me, too." And everyone's paying attention. She's an activist now, Paris is, and she says it's the most meaningful work that she's ever done. In recent interviews, she's highlighted her involvement in state and federal legislation related to- Good youth institutional abuse and online exploitation, two things she knows very well. In 2022, Paris comes out with the podcast that I mentioned earlier, Trapped in Treatment. She's the executive producer. It's hosted by Rebecca, who's an investigator, and Caroline, who is a survivor. They do an amazing job. I will tell you now, I listened to a bunch of episodes to prep for this, this podcast episode, obviously. It's super upsetting. Mm. Like, go in just ready to hear some horrific shit. Yikes. But it's so important at the same time. Like, these, these places should not fucking exist. Yeah. So now Paris is doing great. She married her partner, Carter. Mm-hmm. She, in the documentary, is like, "I don't know if I'll ever get married. I don't know if I'll ever have kids." Well, she loves her children so much. Mm-hmm. So she has a son called Phoenix- That's who it is, yeah and a daughter called London, which I loved because in the documentary she's like, "I've always wanted a daughter and I've always wanted to name her London." So she actually had a surrogate, so she had two kids. They're like 10 months apart or something. Oh, that's nice. And she surprises Kathy with a baby. She's just like, "This is mine now." She has a media company called Eleven Eleven Media. She is actively lobbying lawmakers on child welfare and digital privacy issues. She speaks openly about PTSD, anxiety, ADHD, and long-term effects of her experience as a teenager. She does say this is the best point that she's ever been in in her life, and she knows that she's not alone anymore. And at one point they're like, "Will you ever divorce from this brand or this persona?" And she basically is like, "No." She just seems really attached. It feels like a defense mechanism. Like, this is- Yeah the thing that helped her survive, and without it, she doesn't know- Yeah, just who she is who she is. Yeah. You can tell by the end she just feels more at peace knowing other people were there to talk her through it and talk- finally talking to her mom about it. Yeah, I feel like that brought her a lot of peace. Yeah, you gotta, you gotta talk about your shit, gang. So I asked ChatGPT to wrap us up, right? Okay. Our girl. And Chat said, "The good news is that Paris Hilton's story helped shine a spotlight on an industry that survivors have been trying to expose for decades. While some programs still exist today, there is far more public awareness, scrutiny, and accountability than there was when Paris was a teenager. Since she spoke out, facilities have faced investigations and lawsuits. Some have closed, and lawmakers have pushed for stronger protections for children. In many ways, the story isn't just about what happened to Paris. It's about how thousands of survivors finally got people to listen, and how that attention has started to create real change. This story starts with a teenage Paris Hilton being dragged out of bed by strangers, but it ends with an adult Paris Hilton sitting in government buildings, helping pass laws so that fewer kids have to go through what she did." Yeah. "And honestly, whether you love Paris Hilton or think she's ridiculous, that's a hell of a character arc." I would agree. And that is the story of Paris Hilton in PCS. I didn't even know that was a thing. Yeah, so I heard about it because I remember when she made that post and how big of a deal it was because she was the ditzy blonde, like, "That's hot." And, like, on The Simple Life with Nicole Richie, just so rich you're not even on planet Earth anymore. Yeah, not the same playing field. Yeah, you're, you're just not touching the same grass that we are. She's actually fucking brilliant. Like, Kathy Hilton said she's one of the smartest people you'll ever meet. That's so funny. And at one point, one of the girls from Provo is like, "I remember sitting in class," because if you did well enough at Provo, you got to, like, go to class. during their class system and, you know, you, like, earn points or whatever, and the teacher asked a question. She was like, "I will never forget you piping up and talking about economics and saying something so eloquently and brilliantly and simply," and when she was done, thinking to myself, "Holy shit, that girl's a fucking genius." Like, she's actually so smart. She's just been through a fuck ton. Yeah. And you know what? She's amazing at marketing herself. She's, she works her ass off. I mean, she legitimately has, like, 18 different jobs. Now, does it help- She did it all that she's a nepo baby? Of course it does. Like, hello. You s- we... She started off on home base. Yeah, but you have to have a personality and some sort of brain to do it. She fucking hustles. Hustles. She seems to really love DJ-ing, 'cause it mixes her, the love of the nightlife. It's honestly hilarious. Yeah, I know. I lo- I love when celebs become DJs. I think it's hilarious. She- Except for Kyle Cook e- except for Kyle Cook. She loves animals. She still helps out with animals. Now she's a mom. I mean, she's, she's doing it. I'm so happy for her. Like, I'm so happy she got to have this experience and kind of, I don't know, what... The best analogy I can think of is, like, suck the poison out of the wound almost. Yeah, like find some peace and then it's- Yeah, and it's like it doesn't go away, but j- hopefully she's, she's found some peace. Yeah, for sure. That's hot. I don't even know if I could do it like that. With a l- a little rasp? That's hot. No, I can't do it. With some, some vocal fry? I can't do it. Okay. Well, maybe you should watch some videos of Paris Hilton. I figure you would be, like, a big simple life girly. I was past that. W- oh yeah, 'cause you were a bebe. I was a child. I was a wee lass. Who did you idol- Like, was it Hannah Montana? Kind of, yeah Like, who was your...? Hilary Duff. Hilary Duff. Oh, of course. Yeah. I also loved Britney Spears. Like, I was weirdly obs- But no one else was weirdly obsessed with Britney Spears. Oh my God, I loved, I loved her so much. Oops, I Did It Again. Oops, I- That song fucking slaps. That music video? Mm-hmm. Get out of here. The Slave 4 U one is good, too. Mm. Mm-hmm. Love that one. Which one? Oh, Toxic, when she's on the plane. Yes. Yes. I mean- Iconique. Iconique. Okay. What are you up to? What's coming up? Nothing. What do you got? Nothing. I have to go to Vegas for work and nothing. I'm going to San Fran for work. I don't wanna go. I think you need to find... I, I get, I totally get it. You didn't enjoy it last time. I think you need to find your, like, home base within Vegas. I agree. Like, your favorite restaurant. I feel better now about it. Yeah, so, like, when you go, you still have those comforts. Like, you find your favorite pub sub, and you find your favorite... Do you know what I mean? Perch. Yes. You gotta find, you gotta find your perch. Hacks, the TV show I love, happens in Vegas. Oh. And every time I look at it, I think of you. Little oomph to get you going in excitement- for your trip. Yes, for my, for my bachelorette in August, which I'm buying RuPaul's Drag Race live tickets. Between RuPaul's Drag Race live and, and Backstreet Boys at The Sphere- At the same time I, I'm... I actually might pass away. It's going to be incredible. Where does he, she perform? So it's not RuPaul, it's the drag queens. Yeah. And they put on, like, a live drag show at The Flamingo. It's The Flamingo, okay. That was my question, yeah. Yeah. The show's at 9:30. I'm like, "Okay, Vegas." Hmm. That doesn't surprise me. She's late. That doesn't surprise me at- ooh. On a Thursday? No, not even... Out of that. W- uh, I saw the way those people were at 5:00 in the morning- when I left, was leaving for my flight home. I know. Fear. I felt fear. Yeah. I remember when I went to Vegas as, like, a ripe, disgusting 23-year-old feral animal, we were going out at, like, 12:30, 1:00- Yeah and getting home at 6:00 AM. Yeah, yeah. Feel different, man. But I'm, I'm 35 now, uh- I mean, you could still do it, I just feel like it's dated on- I'm tired. Well, don't be... Take a nap. I know. I know. Too tired? Take a nap. And it's on my birthday. Like, I have to go see RuPaul's Drag Race on my birthday. Of course you do. Like, suck it the fuck up. Of course you do. Duh. I would judge you if you didn't. Thank you so much. Honestly, as we get older, I find myself talking about the weather so much, it's, like, irritating to me. Yeah, I hope you all have great weather, and you don't let the weather app lie to you, and you- Liar you do your rain dance, and you will the sun to come out, and it fucking will. Like from The Proposal? To the window. See, you always say that, and I always think of Annie. The sun will come out tomorrow. Oh, no. That's what, that's where my brain goes, okay? It's an okay. Okay. Love you, mean it. Love you, mean it. Goodbye. Goodbye. Goodbye, good day, good day, sir.